Coronation Street thread

[Padders]

7 minutes ago, Rockers rule said:

 

Here you go Padders as promised.

TV run down of Christmas Corri + bonus observation's.

Can't believe it's nearly 11 months since I last posted on this Corri thread, but here goes.

 

Part1.

Unable to move after Christmas dinner (that's my story and i'm sticking to it ).

No option but to watch Coronation street with HTSBO.

First rule of 'Fight Cub'? you don't mention 'Fight Club'.

First rule of 'Storming off in a Huff' in 'Soap Land' - Leave yer phone at home , because what could possibly go wrong .

Good old Fizz belting along in't middle of nowhere singing 🎵 What a wonderful world🎵 or something like that (I wasn't really listening).

What could possibly go wrong .

Car breaks down - 'well bugger me', in't middle of nowhere as well, with no phone, nor money  

Thankfully, up pops Santa's 🎅 little helper (resplendent in his red duffle coat) still carries 'real money' with him finds a red telephone box (that hasn't been vandalised) and Fizz makes it to her surprise Christmas day wedding  

The registrar has to be brought back because he's already set off thinking Fizz wasne gonna show.

The comedy writer for Coronation Street must have had a moment of inspiration (or hadn't been out celebrating) with the fantastic bit of interaction between The registrar and the always unshaven scruffy **** Kevin.

Registrar; I didn't get far, there was congestion at Nutsford services.

Kevin; I had a pair of trousers like that 🤣 🤣 🤣 I nearly lost my my 0% Guinness .

 

Part2.

Eye-lash (instead of Eileen). Comedy writer has earned his bonus this year ✔️.

I digress, Eileen and her surprise new settee for Christmas.

Come on. plagiarised from an advert even I've seen on't telly, the helpful miscreants of Eileen's household having clubbed together bought a lovely red leather Chesterfield.

Oooooop's it's a miniature Chesterfield (great merriment) for a doll's house. (laugh i nearly opened another can )

£131+£3.99 (dearest) on't fleacebay.

 

WHAT DO WE DO ❓ WHAT DO WE DO ❓

 

Use a coffin, chuck a throw over it, job's a good un .

(I'd have had Eileen saying "Does this settee smell of 'Formaldehyde" 🤣

 but obviously Corra's comedy writer couldn't spell Formaldehyde or having had a couple of inspirational moments already, needed a rest for a while.

 

Part3.

The lovely Paula Wilcox about to get duped out the money from her house sale and finally submit to 'Percy Filth' with the slimy brother of Fish face Gail. 

Wise up Girl  I know there's an age difference, (just) but I'd stand being your 'Toy Boy' if 'Percy Filth' is all your after 😍   .

 

Observation.  Les Battersby eating Christmas Turkey with tyre tracks - one of Corra's  greatest moments.

For a Christmas day special I thought yesterdays offering lacked luster .

4/10 must try harder .

 

 

 

Emmerdale.

Emmerdale, same rule applies. 

Unable to move after Christmas dinner had no option but to watch Emmerdale with HTSBO .

 

Now we're talking.

Christmas day in't gaol. 

Long lost Brothers.

Cheated on Hubby's.

Ostracised Trollops.

Son ignoring said Trollop.

Unknown they've been cheated on partners.

Unknow they've been cheated on partners who's partner has pupped up the lass who has only just found out she is not the daughter of who she thought was her mam but the daughter of the woman who was the partner of the guy who has just gotten killed and the same guy who was seeing the sister of the guy who's in gaol who's young son actually killed the bugger not him.   (Lost 🐘🐘❓don't follow me )

(No full stops, No comma's, No excuses ) 

Christmas cards from the Dead.

Christmas Jumpers in Abundance .

Randy nearly moments with ex.

Disappointed Ex's.

Second Disappointed Ex?

Disappointed youngster coz he didn't get any shells for his Dads firearm for Christmas .

Deformity belittlement (Marlon being called 'Sticks')  .

Fick Doctor but not too fick that he can't manage to stuff down three Crimbo dinners down his neck.

(Above read ' must have been smaller plates than Mr's Rocker served up 😋)

Street party's. 

Drunken aging ex Fairground Worker 'Dad Dancing' .

Yep it's all happening down on the Farm.

 

So how do you finish that hours worth of bilge 

 

Stuff yer dead Mam's ashes in a firework and send her skywards 💥.

 

Bring back Matt Skilbeck .

 

I can't believe i'm writing this next piece.

 

EASTENDERS

 

Couldn't watch Danny Dire getting his 

Mr's R said I couldn't watch it    apparently she hasn't watched it for a while and is still watching episode from March .

Gonna have to put her a telly in't kitchen 🤣.

I'll get one of the kids to put it on 'Catch-up?' for me and watch it all seratipiously like .

 

 

GHOST'S CHRISTMAS SPECIAL.

 

Definitely better than the last one.

Daft enough to be funny ✔️.

 

Keep safe out there & TV binge responsibly .

 

(Give us a shout if Paula writes back )

 

Rocker .

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Absolutely brilliant Rocker.

I had to skip Emmerdale and Eastenders cus I don't watch em.

But your synopsis of Corrie was spot on.

I've managed to get my Daughter hooked on Corrie, and the conversation we had last night was almost word for word identical to your post..

It's got to be the best comedy show on't Tele.

Thanks again Rocker 

 

[cressida]

Corrie have offered Bob Dylan a cameo after he said 'it felt like home'  -  it probably does to Bill Roache as well,  he spends most of his life there in his two-up two-down instead of his large house in Cheshire.

[Mister M]

1 hour ago, cressida said:

Corrie have offered Bob Dylan a cameo after he said 'it felt like home'  -  it probably does to Bill Roache as well,  he spends most of his life there in his two-up two-down instead of his large house in Cheshire.

I couldn't believe it when I read that Bob Dylan was a fan. You'd have thought that someone with his intelligence would have had more sense than to watch that tripe!

Unless of course he's watching the old ones from the 1970s and 1980s, when it was worth watching.

[cressida]

hahaha you'll have soap fans up in arms,  saying that , I don't watch them either - oh hush my mouth!

 

Bob Dylan has been in western films,  which I enjoyed all over xmas on BBC2 in the 90s.

Edited December 26, 2022 by cressida

[PRESLEY]

On 18/09/2022 at 23:07, smithy266 said:

I stopped watching it after they killed off Harold Bishop.

 

Did he get Bashed. 

[ukdobby]

How many bedrooms does Eilleen have?

[Rockers rule]

1 hour ago, PRESLEY said:

Did he get Bashed. 

Ernest Bishop was shot dead.

If I remember, quite topical at the time.

Pre (BACS) wages paid directly into your bank, wage snatches were quite common.

[Padders]

42 minutes ago, Rockers rule said:

Ernest Bishop was shot dead.

If I remember, quite topical at the time.

Pre (BACS) wages paid directly into your bank, wage snatches were quite common.

Ernest Bishop was shot on a Monday night.

The ambulance arrived on a Wednesday night.

If it wasn't for the NHS Ernest would be alive today.

[Baron99]

On 27/12/2022 at 13:56, ukdobby said:

How many bedrooms does Eilleen have?

We've often wondered that?  Eileen & the undertaker in one bedroom.  Her son; Sean; isn't the undertaker's sister living there?; Mary & Sean's son, when he turns up. 

 

The only 6 bedroom, 2 up, 2 down in existence. 

[Padders]

Well it seems the Rovers Return is struggling....

Like many pubs it is in danger of closing, the Rovers is a traditional pub with loyal customers...

But like many business's it's feeling the pinch of the cost of living crisis...

Therefore I would like to take this opportunity to reassure the clientele of "Padders Bar" that were in no danger of closing. After a modest increase in prices, the accounts are showing a small but healthy profit, although the Sambuca Cocktails are currently trading at a loss.

I can't raise the price of a Sambuca Cocktail for fear of repercussions.

I can also report that the INN-U-ENDO entertainment palace, is also under the cosh.

Please don't listen to any malicious gossip from the two SF rumour mongers.

Thank you,

The management........