summer1955

remembering my hubby who died march 2006, my father inlaw who died sept 2006 and my dad who died jan 1993

your wrong there it was brought out long before that as in 1973 my hubby and i was on one but cant remember what it was called back then and then they changed it to family credit. i think the most you could get back then was about £5 and we got the full amount as he was on a low paid job, think he only earned about a £1 more than dole money and i had just had our first child and there was no child benefit for a first child back then

for some people over 50 is not too old to be looking for someone. if thats what you realy want. some people are so used to being in a relationship that they feel that they do not function properly without a partner in thier life. i am 53 been single now for nearly 3 years since hubby died been with someone since for 4 months and it was hell, so i weighed up the good and bad things for a relationshp and decided theres too much bad than good and dont want another man in my llife ever, i am better off on my own. i honestly cant think of one good reason why i need a man and i am not turning the other way either.

i watched it the first time round and i thought it was funny too, best laugh i had in ages

just sounds like i have felt many times and the exacts word to what i have thought myself some tablets dont work for everyone and you may need to change them i was put on some once and they made me worse i felt like my head was going to explode even the smallest amount of noise felt like it was realy loud and i got realy nasty tempered on them also once prescribed prozac and they were the same i was put on trazadone and they were ok you dont have to call the samaritans if you dont feel you can lift up the phone and just start talking to someone you can email them.maybe writing to them about how you are feeling may help you i know its dificult to get someone to talk to and there is a waiting list but sometimes doctors think they know whats best and dont always. i wanted to talk but because i had lost my hubby the year previous to last year when i was put on the tablets again, i just got berievement councilling and i had other things that where going round my head but they did not seam to want to know and just sent me to this, which i had already been on some councilling when he was ill and first died. i hate taking tablets and i am not on them at the moment but i know i will be back on them soon due to my circumstances changing and i know i will not beable to cope as the only way i am getting through each day without tablets is not to do anything that realy stresses me out, so the only people i have around me are my family and nobody else, so i dont go anywhere much just to shops and my mothers.

i remember in the early/mid 80s we had a gas fire fitted a friend of ours told us dont go to gas company you can save some money just get someone out of paper we did he told us. so i did, they came round put this gas fire in, we had got off a friend of ours not the one that said get someone out of paper when they had gone i thought it did not look right it seemed low but never had a gas fire before only coal fire so thought maybe it gets better when its been on a bit it had been put in about half an hour when my hubbys friend came over to see him he said the fire didnt look right, i told him i thought it didnt and as i went to the corner of the room noticed that our 2 zebra finches where dead i tried to get the people that put in the gas fire but this woman said she just took phone calls for them and made appointment and i told her what happened i got on to gas company who came out and condemed the gas fire saying it was no good and they should not have put it in, they also had not put the fire in properly they had not put a back plate on which they are suppose to. they then went to check the rest of the gas appliences the cooker they said was faulty the oven on it they condemed as it was leaking gas and when they checked our gas meter that was also leaking gas they said we were very lucky, but if we had not had the fire put in we would never have known about the other things as well. i kept telling my hubby everytime i put money in gas meter i could smell gas but when he went to it he couldnt smell it told me i was imagining things.

i dont trust anyone only my family

According to Cardiff's Common Cold Centre, the symptoms of a common cold include: A scratchy, sore throat; A blocked or runny nose; A cough. Common flu symptoms include: Spells of high fever (hovering above 101°F) and chilliness; Severe muscle aches and pains; Followed later by the traditional cold symptoms; Flu tends to have a more sudden on-set than a cold.

on the first come first served lettings there are 2, 1 bed flats one at darnal and one at pitsmoor there is no age restriction , there is also a 3 bed masionette at winn gardens

i dont watch much tv. last night was just the soaps, first hollyoaks then emmerdale corrie and eastenders and back to corry and tonight it will be just the same hollyoaks emmerdale and eastenders that mostly all i ever watch except for thursdays i watch terminator the sarah connors chronicals and on saturday it will be x factor and tv burps and sunday might not watch any tv unless there is a musical thing on again like the last 2 weeks christmas i usually watch more tv as i usually sit and watch a few films

yes but you still have to be confident in talking to people so you have to be ok with comunications skills even if you dont have to have qualifications

quoted from the site ms macbeth put You will also need to show that you are capable of working with and caring for dogs and other animals and that you are competent, knowledgeable and confident in aspects of animal handling, husbandry and welfare. Candidates should also have good communication and customer care skills. so if you dont have any of these skills which you only get if you have done this work or something simular can you get a job that does not need any qualification you might not need any qalifications but you still have to have some skills for the job,

yes and a lot of these people that are milking the system exagerating their illness eventually do get sick to be genuine. like the saying goes what goes round comes round. i have known many people that have exagerated their illnes to get more money or not have to get a job only to find they then are genually ill and do need these extra benefits if you go to an advice place to get advice over what to put when you fill in these forms they tell you to put it down as if every day is your worse day and not that you have good days and bad days. why should someone go to work if them doing a job makes their symptoms worse and difficult to manage. you may see someone and think there looks nothing wrong with that person why is he/she claiming incapacity benefits or disability living allowance, but there may be more wrong then you can see. there are a lot of people that are claiming illegally and its not just the people that are unemployed, some of them are working as well as claiming these benefits. you are making it out that only the people that are unemployed are milking the system and they are not, there are also people that are working and milking the system as well with your quote ""Thats why so many people have theattitide of 'I will keep popping out kids so i can get a house and never have to work".

there are some jobs he cant do as he as got a trapped nerve in his spine one at the top and one at the bottom of his spine so he as a lot of back problems and something where he is not lifting he as just finnished a course with job plus in a warehouse lifting which he should not be doing realy and he as put his back and shoulder out again and off sick for a month it happened on his last day as well.he realy needs a job that is not too many hours standing and with not lifting and he says he is not bothered about earning a lot of money if it just a few pounds more than dole money to get them off his back. he realy wants retail work as thats what he as always done when he as been working which is mostly government training and only had one proper job which he liked but the man had to sell the business as he could not afford to keep it on. he is 35 years old and all he as ever done is goverment schemes since leaving school, and he as done quite a few of them. mostly working in newsagents, charity shops, wilkinsons which he as just done. he signs on for 6 months to a year then he is on a scheme for probably 6 months then back to signing on for another 6 months to a year. he as applied for numerous jobs

the person that was training him when he went to do something with electician work and he was told he would only be on the course for a year and said it takes 3 years to do the proper course and that at his age and not much experience in anything he would not get a job

to add to the main question which you have quoted i know what its like to be on benefits for a long time. my late hubby died nearly 3 years ago and he was 50 we were married nearly 34 years from being both 16 and he worked about 5 years out of all that time yes in the beggining it was his own fault he couldnt stick to a job not because he didnt like to work or that he didnt like the jobs he was doing he had a bad temper never hit anyone but would storm out of a job,and he was a good worker when he worked as my dad told me that as he worked once in same place as my dad and his workman told my dad what a good worker he was. so he was constantly changing jobs and from say about 1975 until 1980 he wasnt working went for a few jobs but he felt he didnt have anything to offer after going for an interview and he was told in a round about way that he was thick was told that because he discribed how he would do a job with his hands he didnt have the brains to do the job and was in danger of either accidents or not doing the job right as anyone that thinks with their hands and not their brains are slow and not intelegent enough this put him off for awhile as this realy got to him which was something from his childhood about being called thick and stupid ect and his mum had to have him to a psychiatrist to prove to him that he wasnt, so he always had issues with things like that. which is why he used to walk out of jobs a lot. he wanted to show them that he did want work and he got a governement scheme in 1980 for a year and he only lost 1 week the all time he was there and even when the job was not suited to him as it made him come out in a bad skin problem he wanted to carry on as he wanted to work but after the year was up would not keep him on due to this from 1981 until he died he never had another job went on schemes even did some volentary work which he liked and they made him give up as it took up is right for unemployment benefit. he even did a course in computer maintenance as well.he even wanted to do vollentry work for his money to help kids keep out of trouble with computers even spoke to a policeman that used to come to him over computer problems and he said the government couldnt afford to do this,he said he didnt want paying gladly do it for something to do for his dole money as he just loved computers.he said he would have kids to our house i said no chance to that. he didnt lie when he said he would have a job and wanted to work if someone would give him a chance but no chance you will probably say he was a lier too saying if they would get him a job he would work but he wasnt. after a while you do loose the plight to look for jobs as the longer you have been out of the work the harder it is to get a job.he sent off many applications but he never got an interview for a job. not everyone on long term unemployment want to be there, yes a lot is their own fault but there is a lot of people that do things when they are younger and immature that can spoil their lifes in some way. he would have a go at most things and could mend computers cbs a lot of electrical things, plumbing, he would try and have a go at almost anything. and dont say he could have done training in some of these things to get certificates government training when he did them was not long enough to get any certificates and he was told when he was doing the courses that he would not get a job in what he was training in at his age and that was when he was in his 30s and was told that if you have not got any proper skills by the time you are in your 30s you have no chance and expect to be out of work a long time

so what about them that work and claim benefits are they better because they work and what about the men that are working and living with a partner and children and say they are not so as their partners can claim benefits, are they better people because they are working. there are a lot of people claiming like this and i would say that the ones just claiming benefits they are entitled to are the better person than the ones that are working and getting full benefits as well. you probably think that they are better as they are paying into the tax system for their partners to claim benefits. i dont think someone that works is a better person than someone that does not there is good and bad in all people. if you are not a murderer or a phedophile an abuser or someone that thieves off other people than you are a good person and it does not matter if you work or not, working does not make you the better person so if a person that works is one of those people that i mention then are they better than someone claiming benefits even if they have probably exagerated a little to probably get their money. most people if they can get away with it will do something illegal if they are not hurting anyone. i cant believe anyone is 100% honest all their life.anyoone that can say that they have never said or done something that they should not have then they can say they are the better person

there are not enough jobs for everyone and there are many that are signing on that want a job and apply for many. my son went for an interview the other week for a job it was only for the christmas period but he thought he was in with a chance as he was doing a govenment training scheme there which was due to finish, he didnt get the job which there was about 6 i think on offer and there was over 100 applicants for the jobs yes there are some out there that dont want a job most not because they are idle but because they think why should they get a job and be worse off than claiming dole money, especially the ones with a family, the single ones are better off working

you could be right there jabbers i am fascinated as well and deep down wonder if its like you said recordings in a place but what about ghost that do not belong to that place one house i lived at we were there for almost 7 years and nothing weired ever happened in the house except i saw my dads face in the private outside and also something when i looked out the back window but in the house nothing. but then a few months or maybe could be up to a year before we moved out it felt a bit weired i am convinced that the man that used to live there before us had died and come to visit his old house. he had bought the house off the council but sold it them back and moved into a bungalow i was told that when we moved in there and i knew he had cancer of the throut as we had booklets for him. i would love to know if he had died as thats the feeling i got unless something was telling me my late hubby was ill as he was ill but didnt realy know it at the time and i was getting one of my funny feeling to someting being wrong which i sometimes get. i have lived in many houses that have had weired happenings. the house where we lived when my hubby died i didnt want to move into as i had a strange feeling when we went to look at it as we were not going to be happy there but he wouldnt listen to me. at the moment i am in two minds on something which i am trying to work out. i believe in reincarnation, well i did and feel my granddaughter is my hubby reincarnated as she is his double and like him in other ways, but i have been to spiritualist meeting and have messages from him and they have been right and some they could not have possibly known or even guess at. but then if i am still getting messages off him then he cant be reincarnated as my granddaughter. so maybe i am wrong in reincarnation and i dont want to be as i have always believed in it as i have felt i have been here a few times and have had the feeling very strong. so i am telling myself that my granddaughter is not him reincarnated even though everytime i look at her and watch her i feel it so. she never saw her grandad but she always looks at his photo and points to it even when she was only a few months old and first started to smile she looked at his photo and smiled as if she knew him

christmas is always the hardest time for missing our loved ones and it does not matter how long they have been dead. my dad as been dead almost 16 years and i still think about him at certain times, time does make it easier as you know you have to move on and get on with your life.its good to think about those magic times you shared. my happiest memories about my dad was when i was younger and most sundays he would go for a drink and on his way back he would go into barnards at manor top and get my mum some chocolates and me a big box of smarties. every witsontide we would walk over to park on ridgeway road then up to elm tree where i would sit outside just in the doorway.being an only child a girl i had to be a lad as well and we always played football and other ball games when he could as he used to work long hours. this is the 3rd christmas without my hubby and nobody realy says much but i know my kids are thinking about him especially as it was his birthday just over a week ago and my son as been playing his music when he comes over.we often sit and talk about what we think about what he would be listening to today or watching on tv if he was here. for me everytime my granddaughter comes to visit i see him, she is the double of her grandad and she is 18 months old.everyone says how much she looks like him, its as if she as been re incarneted as her, even before she was born and they showed us the photo of her in the womb i couldnt believe how much she looked like him even hubbys mum and sister said how much she looked like him i hate these kind of threads they always make me want to cry

yes i can remember it as if it was yesterday. i am no liar. i can see it in my mind exactly where the table was, where we all where sat and to most of what was said we put letters round in a circle with the glass in the middle. i was sat with my back to the wall which connected to the kitchen, his cousin was sat opposite me and my late hubby to my left side we asked if anyone was there, the glass just moved around a little bit then spelt yes, we asked who it was and it spelt jesu, i remember saying thats jesus minus the s. we asked if it was male it said no, then female and it said no. well you can guess what my hubby then asked if it was gay, bi and the like and it just went round in circles. my hubby and his cousins started acting silly asked some naughty questions and it just went round in circles. i got scared and told them to stop it as i thought it was them messing about. first my hubby took his finger off the glass and said its not me, then his cousin took his finger off the glass and said not me, which left me with my finger on the glass and it was going round in a circle and i knew i was not moving it. i took my finger off the glass it went round again in a circle and then it just shot straight at my hubby hiting him in the chest. my hubbys young sisters where sat behind an arm chair scared. that it exactly how it happened.not exagerated or added anything.i have a very good memory of remembering things like that or anything that as happened to me when i was younger. for trivial things of everyday my memory is not very good and i wish i remembered trivial things more than some things that have happened in my past which i would like to forget.

well i know what i saw or what we all saw.how can 5 people imagine a glass move on its own, i know we were all young my hubby and i 18 his cousin 19 and my sister inlaws who where only 10 and 12 and scared to what they saw nobody moved the glass or pushed it off the table it went a good 8 foot straight and it left a mark on my hubbys chest where it hit him with some force as if someone had litterally thrown it at him. i know no one pushed it or anything as my finger was the last one to move off the glass and i am not lying or exagerating and my eyes were transfixed to the glass, the house that it happened had many weired things happen we were not on drugs or drink and this is going back to the early 70s. and no i have not forgot anything or added anything over the years thats just how it was. i will never forget it as any other thing that has happened i keep an open mind to anything until it is proven 100% its not true

if you want kids and he does not then you are better out of the relationship as in the end it will come between you. a friend of mine some years ago she was in her late 20s and she had been with her bloke since she was about 15 and he didnt mind having kids but he didnt want to get married, she wanted to get married first before she had any kids i told her that having kids and not married is not taboo these days and she had better think about what she wants they had been together a long time and he didnt mind them having a kid and i told her that she had to have a kid as they were or leave the relationship as if she gets too old it will come between them in later life and she will start to resent him for her not having kids she changed her mind and told me that i was right it didnt matter that they were not married they had been together a long time and they did have a child and they are still together another 17 years later if you dont both want the same things then its best not to be in that relationship. you could get pregnant accidently on purpose and hope he changes his mind as a lot of men are just scared of all that responsability and when it happens soon come round but then you have to think that it could also be the end of your relationship if he does not want a child and are you prepared to bring it up on your own me personally i would go with the hope he comes round to the idea and get pregnant accidently on purpose. i know thats devious and not very nice in some ways but he may never know

you are right there a group seeing something like a light or something in the sky can all see it and make the same conclusion, i know once my late hubby and i saw something in the sky and i am going back to the middle to late 70s when we saw it and he was convinced it was a ufo i just said i hope not but didnt rule it out as it was not just kept an open mind as i always do the thing that 5 people saw was a glass move off a table and hit my late hubby in the chest and nobody moved it.even if it had moved by someone a tiny bit my late hubby was too far away for it to have hit him by just that he would have had to be closer to it the glass started going around in circles a bit too fast with our finger on the glass as my late hubby and his cousin where asking it naughty questions as they were only 18,19 at the time. i was scared told them both to stop, first hubby took his finger off so i blamed his cousin, he took his finger off and the glass was still going around in a circle i took my finger off as i knew i was not doing it and it went round in circle for a few seconds then went straight for my hubby who had then moved further back and it hit him right in the chest he was too far back for it to have hit him if i had just moved it a little when i took my finger off and it would have moved straight away as well which it didnt. the only other explaination is that i moved it with my mind. which i dont think i am that good enough to do.in my mind nothing moves unless you or someone or something moves it. there as been other things but you could possibly say its all in the mind and come up with explainations to why and i possibly could as well to some things that have happened.

jabbers added a chat room and it came on so it must work