Just found out I'm pregnant..very anxious!

[GoGo_dancer 10]

Hi

 

Just to give an overview, me and my ex-husband were trying for a baby for about 2 years, but I had PCOS, endometriosis and a blocked tube. I tried fertility drugs but no joy, and then somehow I managed to concieve, but miscarried within a matter of days. The strain of everything exposed huge cracks in our marriage and I decided to leave. It was the lowest point of my life.

In May last year I went ahead with a pre-scheduled laparoscopy to fix my blocked tube, and also had ovarian drilling and my endo lasered off. Shortly after I met a wonderful guy and we've just come back from an amazing holiday in Cuba, and guess what, I'm pregnant!

 

We're both thrilled with the news, especially after what I've been through, but I'm finding it very hard to stay positive. I'm almost convinced that I'm going to get my hopes up and something will go wrong and I'll miscarry again. Obviously I know it's common and there are no guarantees, but if anyone could offer me some advice on how to stay positive so I can enjoy this pregnancy that I've wanted for so long, I'd really appreciate it!

[anniec 10]

Thats fantastic news, I'm really really pleased for you.

 

If I'm honest being positive is going to difficult for you in the begining. You'll worry and fret no matter how hard you try not to. Be safe in the knowledge that this is totally normal.

 

Once you've had your 12 week scan you'll feel a difference thats when most women start to relax and enjoy the pregnancy.

 

It's a mad and crazy (emotional) time for you at the moment but it will get better and you will be a mummy before you know it!

 

Woo Hoo!!!

[jennycakes 11]

wow thats fantastic news,some things have a strange way of working out,

 

good luck and enjoy your pregnancy:thumbsup:

[Zebra 10]

Congratulations!

Focus on keeping yourself healthy and keep in mind that it's often said that miscarriages are usually because there is something wrong with the blastocyst/foetus etc, not because of the mother.

The great news is that you can successfully conceive, just keep your body a good place to be and nature will deal with the rest.

[GoGo_dancer 10]

Thanks guys. I know I'm worrying about something that's out of my control but, well, I just can't help myself!

 

My last miscarriage was classed as a chemical pregnancy so I know it wasn't my fault, but I've done some reading and I know the chances of having another chemical pregnancy are slimmer, so that's something.

 

I'm in much better shape now than I was before, I'm slimmer, eating more healthily and also much better prepared emotionally too, so I'm just going to keep everything crossed and hope this one decides to stick around.

 

I'll be due the week before Christmas too, so that should be fun!

[cosywolf 10]

I know very few people who just sail through it all convinced everything will be fine, and they're mostly very young or very optimistic.

I think the rest of us have past bad experiences or neuroses or too much time spent talking to other parents about childbirth etc (or moderating a Parenting Group, lol) and overinflate in our minds the possibilities of something bad happening to us/our pregnancies because being pregnant means so much to us, it is so hormonal, and you have so little control over any of it.

 

Even with one successful pregnancy behind me, I was a complete nightmare with my second, (who is now 7 months old).

I was constantly freaking out that I was going to miscarry, feeling convinced that something 'just wasn't right', etc etc. It's normal, and tho that doesn't really help when you're going through it, it's worth bearing in mind that you are not alone with it, nor are you going crazy, nor have you suddenly gained the ability to see into the future.

 

We all have different ways of dealing with it. I tried to keep my mind busy with other things, wolfing down books, organising household things (my kitchen cupboards were a marvel for a while there, lol), so that those first few weeks passed quickly. The feelings of anxiety probably won't disappear completely, but they will lessen considerably after your 12 week scan, more so after your 20 week scan, etc.

 

Congratulations, I'm so pleased for you. :) And you know where to come with all your questions/moans/news...

[*binty* 10]

Congratulations

[Corbyn 10]

Congratulations. I think cosywolf is right that most people worry even if they haven't had a previous bad experience such as yourself. I didn't plan my first baby and I knew nothing about pregnancy or pregnancy complications. I didn't worry an awful lot as I was quite unaware of how much there was to worry about.

 

I am 15 weeks pregnant now and a total worry pot! I was convinced something wasn't right early on. My 12 week scan has eased my worries to an extent but I still panic over everything. I think this is because I am aware this time and I know and have read about people who have experienced bad things.

 

Because you have had a bad experience you are bound to worry more and that's just normal. You may find that you may be able to get an early scan to ease your worries a bit and I think just talking everything through with your midwife (get yourself booked in soon if you haven't already) might help as I found just chatting my worries through with my midwife was useful.

 

Hope all goes well for you.

[treadlightly 10]

Congratulations on your pregnancy. As others have said a certain amount of anxiety comes to us all. It seems to me as if you got pregnant when you were happy and feeling positive, it is likely that will have helped you to conceive. Additionally having positive thoughts about the pregnancy can help result in a positive pregnancy. In my first pregnancy I was very anxious about lots of things, and felt negatively during this time also. I'm lucky enough to be pregnant again, and have a much improved attitude towards the pregnancy, thanks to HypnoBirthing (I took the course late on in my previous pregnancy).

 

My advice would be to enjoy your experience and enjoy the pregnancy. Although there are possibilities of things going wrong, that is the case with everything that we do, and if we constantly thought the worst every time we did anything we'd stay at home scared stiff of the world. Think about every time you step out into the road or get into a car, we are taking a risk, but we do it any way. Negative things can happen, but if possible spend your time thinking of the positive things that are happening instead of presuming negativity. I'd be very happy to chat with you more about this if you'd like. PM me for details.

 

Best wishes, and congratulations again.

[mummysaz21 10]

congratulations, i also lost my first baby at 8 weeks was the most painfull experience of my life and i wil never ever forget it and love that baby so much

 

BUT

 

i now have a beautifull 11 month old little boy who is my world, and yes i worried like mad at the beginning then you settle down for a few months then before your due youll worry again lol, thats what mothers do and you will continue to do for the next god knows how many years till we ourself pop our clogs lol, enjoy being a mummy sit back andrelax enjoy ur pregnancy as it dosent last very long and then its gonex

[steelerbabe 10]

Keep everything crossed especially your legs !! lol

 

Sorry to make light of it but you have to laugh or you will drive yourself mad. This is coming from someone who has also suffered from a miscaraige in the past.

 

Will keep my fingers crossed for you.