For all you women out there- men who won't interact with children

[Gazza58 10]

yes i did in the back of my head it just carnt go on like this no more so i guess its make your mind up time

 

Well its certainly not your fault.

[deaf andy 10]

yes i did in the back of my head it just carnt go on like this no more so i guess its make your mind up time

 

good luck i hope it doesn't turn out messy

[natzzz 10]

No child should be made to feel unwanted or that they're in the way, your daughter is at the age where she understands/ notices what is happening around her, she needs to see her mum in a happy, healthy relationship.

 

If this 'man' cares so little that he's willing to upset a child due to his behaviour then not only is he not a man but he's also not a nice person in general. I know people who don't want and have chosen not to have children but they would never treat a child this way. It's disgusting behaviour to be honest but luckily for your kids you know this and hopefully have the strength to get rid of him and enjoy some quality alone time with them before the 13 year old resents you for feeling like you have picked him over her.

 

Good luck and be strong x x x

[Waypher 10]

The Jeremy Vile Show is full of single mothers who have put the selfish needs of their new "partners" before the real needs of their children.

It is just wrong.

A Mother's first concern should always be her children.

There are plenty of blokes out there so pick one who'll give your children the love, support and attention that they deserve.

[jbbaaby 10]

i had one of those blokes you mean and lost him my children will allways come first they allways have

[Waypher 10]

i had one of those blokes you mean and lost him my children will allways come first they allways have

 

That's admirable...and I hope you and your children find the bloke they deserve.

[Just Sarah 10]

he doesnt even talk to them my 13 year old treats him bad because of how he his with her she throws abuse at him all the time but what do i do i know why she does it and that is beacuse she knows he ates her i have to think of my children and not the boyfriend here my kids are so unhappy with the situation but he thinks it is there fault because we never get timd together

 

There could be the problem.

Perhaps your kids just hate the guy and he doesn't like them as a result.

By the by, if my kids spoke to anyone by hurling abuse at them id question my own parenting.

Not liking someone is NO excuse for abuse.

[jbbaaby 10]

i dont think that is the case at all my children do get told off when they step out of line but when they dont even do anything he his like this

[Guest]

Not everyone likes children or wants to be around them; that's an entirely reasonable position. It's also reasonable to assume that if such a bloke gets involved with a woman who has children then he's probably not after a relationship where happy families is the ultimate aim...

 

Providing a home where a child can grow up to be, hopefully, a happy, secure, confident and independent adult surely should be the goal of any parent. Introducing conflict into the home in the form of someone who makes it explicit right from the start that they heartily dislike children and, apparently, dislikes yours so much that he can't even be in the same room as them is, to say the least, not the way forward.

 

This behaviour:

...is it normal for them to sit in a separate rooms then them also to walk out if the children walk in...

from an adult is bizarre. You should run, not walk, away from this bloke.

[SqueakyPete 10]

[/b]

Only one answer really then.

 

I don't even know why anyone would need to ask the op's question.

My mother threw her 13 y/o daughter (my younger sister)out of her home,all because she had met a new man!

A very slimy/creepy looking man too! Who wouldn't look out of place on Crimewatch!

Anyway,this is the reason I have not spoken to her in maybe a decade or so.

And just to add,they split up 2 years later (apparently he turned out to be violent drunk),but to me,the damage done is irreparable.

[jbbaaby 10]

i would never put a man before my children ever i am in the middle because i think my 13 year old blames me for splitting with her dad and i think she feels that he will take her dads place that will never happen she has one dad and one dad only but marriges do break down and most certain it is the children that get affected x

[syne 10]

Your 13 yo shouldn't be allowed to abuse a guest in your house whoever they are ditto for your boyfriend. Though he should be able to deal with the strop and tantrum of a child whether he likes kids or not and if he really wanted to be with you he'd find a way to deal with his own issues.

If he's never had any experience of dealing with teenagers I could see how he'd not really want to be subjected to that particular form of torture.

 

You have to ask yourself is this a forever relationship? as at some point your kids will not be there anymore but in 40 years time you two could be looking back on this as a rose tinted memory.

you will know the answers to your own questions.