Hopman

The lighting equipment was outside Ice Sheffield when I went past on the 15th.

A sandwich shop called Toilet Rolls?

I've seen a few yellow croci.

Isn't it a bit early for Leeds to make a dash for the play-offs?

He didn't know my Sky account number which is hardly surprising as I don't have an account. As for telephone numbers, I think he was using some software to generate random phone numbers.

I've just taken a call from a gentleman purporting to be from Sky advising me of changes to the insurance on the Sky equipment he thought I had. According to this gentleman the monthly cost I'm paying is £11-99 a month, but there are changes afoot. They are reducing this price to a mere £90 but it has to be paid in one go. Or there is the second option of £160 for two years. Which option would I like? When I said I had a third option he seemed surprised at this and asked what it might be. I told him the third option was that he was talking a load of tripe (other offal is available and was used in this case). He apologised for bothering me and by means of compensation offered to send me a free box which if inserted as he suggested could prove painful, so I suggested he save postage and use his own orifice for the purpose. I then put the phone down.

At one time over Easter teams played three games on (perm any 3 from 4) Good Friday Saturday Easter Monday Tuesday (and with smaller squads and muddy pitches).

The kick off was delayed for ten minutes because of VAR deciding whether to hold a minute's applause.

Final home game of the decade sees us 6th in the Premier League. I think we'd have taken that back in July.

A lot of seats will be lost in the next few hours, starting with one of the rows of benches in the BBC's virtual House of Commons which has disappeared.

Heaviest home defeat in three years according to Sky.

I've had my postal vote come through, and for once I've posted it back, rather than walking round to the Polling Station. And before anyone says if I can walk, I don't need a postal vote, I hadn't planned to be in the NGH at the time of the referendum.

Any ideas as to the manufacturer? That will narrow it down to a time period. Who's the shirt sponsor?

Years ago there was a case of a United player being sent out on loan who played against us (and scored at the Kop end), and it did him no favours when he returned.

Whilst this looks sharp practice on the part of SIV, you might need to contact SIV for clarification on this: Head Office For head office enquiries please contact us on 0114 223 3800 or email us.