Would you marry a girl who worked in a sauna?

[Big_Dipper 10]

of what little money you have left you offer to give her £100/week, and live at your house rent free, but it isn't enought to send to her parents and maintain some kind of independence for her....what more can you do?

 

 

think this is what you've got to think about... she is deeply vulnerable, in a profession that batters away at her self esteem (like 99% of prostitutes), and is putting herself in danger of abuse and assault on a regular basis. She isn't doing this because she wants to, she's doing it because she feels she has no choice right? So, whether you marry her or not, i think you should ask yourself, as a friend or a husband, what can you do to help her?

[Big_Dipper 10]

assume you wouldn't touch any of the money she earned in that way

 

if she brought money into the home would you not be guilty of living off imoral earnings ?

[Jess22 10]

Yeah, good point star80, surely marraige should come well after helping her. If you love her (and I presume you do if you want to marry her) then find out about helping her out of the situation she is in, then you can decide whether to marry her or not.

[depoix 11]

why do you need to get married ? you say her parents live in poverty and she sends money home,do you feel you have to marry her so that she can stay in britain ? it sounds a little suspicious to me

[Big_Dipper 10]

perhaps she's done it so long that she views it rather differently to either you or I, she's well beyond thinking too deeply about it and just views it as a process with no emotion involved, the poverty that her parents is in is what she can't stop thinking about and for that she's prepared to have her body abused.

 

think this is what you've got to think about... she is deeply vulnerable, in a profession that batters away at her self esteem (like 99% of prostitutes), and is putting herself in danger of abuse and assault on a regular basis. She isn't doing this because she wants to, she's doing it because she feels she has no choice right? So, whether you marry her or not, i think you should ask yourself, as a friend or a husband, what can you do to help her?

[Big_Dipper 10]

here legally via asylum

 

why do you need to get married ? you say her parents live in poverty and she sends money home,do you feel you have to marry her so that she can stay in britain ? it sounds a little suspicious to me

[Queen P 10]

I think if this is a real situation you are wasting your time asking the question in the first place.Advice is great but as i presume none of the people on here know you personally,or the girl in question then at the end of this you will follow your own heart and intuition.It has to be something you are able to live with nobody else really matters do they? And if you are worried about what people think maybe you shouldnt be with her in the first place.

[Jess22 10]

So her family's poverty have caused her to live a life like this? Do her family know what she is doing to try and help them? And (please don't bite if this is way off the mark, as I don't know the situation or where they are from) but what are the family doing to help themselves, it sounds like this girl needs a lot of help.

[Big_Dipper 10]

her parents would disown her if they ever found out what she has been doing as they have strong religious beliefs, there would be a lot of shame on her and them if they found...

 

So her family's poverty have caused her to live a life like this? Do her family know what she is doing to try and help them? And (please don't bite if this is way off the mark, as I don't know the situation or where they are from) but what are the family doing to help themselves, it sounds like this girl needs a lot of help.

[star80 10]

well it seems like a rather impossible situation then. Not wanting to sound uncaring, but I think she might need to look after herself in this one - make sure she's alright first - go on a course, get some qualifications and a 'normal' job. And she probably needs to tell her parents what lengths she would have to go to to keep sending them money. Obviously i have no idea what they're like, but the probably think it comes easy...

[merlin_7799 10]

Immoral earnings?!

 

I say do what you feel is right - if you're happy go for it and all the best, if not why not and start to work around that. History is in the past and should stay there!

[melthebell 865]

yes

 

 

 

well i wouldnt keep on paying her if i didnt need to