April 2012 theme and competition entries

[Ron Blanco 10]

April 2012 theme & competition: Resurrection

Set by Lady Agatha

 

April is a red letter month for the gardener. This is the time to really get cracking with the sowing and planting, and there is incomparable joy in seeing the garden come back to life. Resurrection is indeed a familiar concept to the Christian in April. I believe that all Christian festivals have true pagan roots and that April must have long hosted a festival celebrating the land's return to fruition. So this is the April theme - Resurrection. Maybe you would like to use a Sci-Fi theme, or take us back to pastoral roots. Interpret as you wish.

 

TO ENTER: Competition entries of 500 words or less should be posted on this thread. If you prefer to write a longer story, outside of the competition, then please post it in a new thread with both the title and 'April 2012' in the heading.

 

JUDGING: Lady Agatha will judge the entries, and will announce the winner in early May.

 

THE PRIZE: The prestige of becoming the SFWG Competition Winner AND the opportunity to choose the writing theme for June 2012.

 

COMPETITION PROTOCOL: All writers enjoy receiving feedback, be it high praise or constructive criticism, but in the interests of competition decorum, please could we ask you not to post your comments on individual entries until after the winner has been announced. After that, please feel free to let rip with as much feedback as you like!

 

Any problems posting/uploading your piece, please consult the guidance 'stickies' at the top of the Forum page. If you still have problems, please contact either Tallyman or Ron Blanco.

 

Have fun!

 

Ron

[mr_blue_owl 10]

A Penny for Your Life

Arthur left his car at the side of the road and started walking. After he had trudged a short distance he came to a fork in the road at which a signpost had been erected. The wooden signpost had two arrows affixed which indicated that the right fork led to ‘RESURRECTION’ while the left fork led to ‘ETERNITY’. ‘What odd place names they have in this part of the country’ thought Arthur ‘I must have been driving through the Bible Belt’. It was also a bit odd that neither of the arrows had the distance to their respective destinations, meaning that he could not choose the shortest walk to go and seek assistance. Arthur looked up the road leading from each fork; there was no sign of any buildings on either of them between where he stood and the bends where the roads disappeared around high ground to the left and right respectively.

‘Resurrection or Eternity? Which was it to be?

 

At around the same time, Dr Sanjay looked at the comatose patient in the intensive care unit of Fleetwood General Hospital and doubted that he was going to make it.

However while the life support machine continued sounding its steady Bleep-Bleep-Bleep, there was still hope of the patient recovering after being declared clinically dead for several minutes. There was a tap on the door and nurse Fisher poked her head around. ‘Is it alright for Mrs Dawson to come in and sit for while?’ Dr Sanjay nodded his assent ‘Of course’.

Mrs Dawson looked in askance at the Doctor.

‘It is going to be touch and go’ he gently advised Mrs Dawson.

‘When will....’ her voice trailed off in a sniffle as teardrops ran down her face.

‘We should know one way or the other very, very soon’ Dr Sanjay replied.

Mrs Dawson sat listening to the ‘Bleep-Bleep-Bleep’ of the machine as she peered inside the box at the few items of her husband’s belongings. Watch, reading glasses, wedding ring, pen, wallet and the ‘lucky’ coin she had given him before they were married. Mrs Dawson picked up the coin and pressed her lips to the smooth surface of the penny on the ‘Heads’ side.

 

Meanwhile Arthur had decided to strike out to Eternity and took a step to his left.

 

At the Fleetwood General Hospital, the life support machine started to slow its ‘Bleep ---Bleep---Bleep’ ‘No!’ shouted Mrs Dawson.

 

Arthur ears pricked as he thought he heard a faint voice in the distance’; he shrugged his shoulders and took another step towards Eternity.

 

Slower still went the ‘Bleep ----- Bleep ------Bleep’ and a red light on its console started to glow.

‘No, please. No!

 

Arthur stopped as once again he thought he heard the distant voice, then for some reason he remembered the lucky coin in his pocket.

Heads - Resurrection, Tails -Eternity.

Arthur Dawson looked which side of the penny was face up before glancing back at the mangled wreck of his car and starting down the road to Resurrection.

 

The Fleetwood Hospital life support machine resumed its former regular ‘bleep-bleep-bleep’ as a green light softly illuminated on its console.

Edited April 14, 2012 by mr_blue_owl
Coections

[greg2 10]

UNDER ONE THOUSAND

Mark glanced up from the sports section of the paper to check whether any potential customer had entered the showroom. It was pretty unlikely, especially on a wet weekday afternoon, but the professional salesman is constantly alert.

To his left, across the Citroens and Fords, there was no sign of life. To his right were the Vauxhalls and the old-but-nice group, currently headed by a BMW with a patched up exhaust. Nothing there either – no, there was someone in the far corner. The far corner …. Mark strolled over in as casual a manner as he could manage given his rising excitement.

‘Interested in the Resurrection, are we, sir?’ he enquired. He would tell this to Mrs Dawson this evening, and then say if the car business ever got difficult he could always work for the Jehovah’s Witnesses, and they would both laugh.

The Resurrection would have looked entirely appropriate in downtown Havana. Its Brazilian designer, inspired by the heyday of the US automobile industry, had equipped it with so many lights and so much chrome that there had been little room left for paint, though these distinctions were now being eroded by the general advance of corrosion. There was leather upholstery and a cavernous boot and it sucked in petrol like a basking shark amongst plankton.

‘Yes I am.’ The customer wore dark glasses and a black leather coat but don’t start thinking about The Matrix, this was a much more avuncular package. You could believe it came from a good Brazilian gents outfitter about the same time that the car had been bankrupting its first owner. ‘I believe this car is a Resurrection from Brazil?’

‘It is indeed,’ replied Mark, and he reached into the passenger compartment to finger the gear stick which, uniquely in a Resurrection, was a six inch model of Rio’s famous statue of Christ the Redeemer. ‘But you don’t have to go to Brazil for spare parts, there’s a dealership in Algeria.’

‘Splendid. I’ll take it,’ said the customer, taking out a large pile of £20 notes and handing about an inch of the pile to Mark. ‘I have to go somewhere else but Richard here will take the car away.’ Richard must have come in to the showroom while they had been speaking. He didn’t mind when the Resurrection failed to start, he and his mate just winched it on to their car transporter, which already contained one other Resurrection. Mark had never seen two Resurrections at once, but he was still silly in the head from selling that car and for £999.

The next morning Mark picked up the paper from the doormat – a classy car outlet should have a paper for customers – and read ‘Pele buys Post Office.’ It seemed the UK Post Office was to be purchased by the Brazilian communications and hi-tech conglomerate Resurrection SA, for £10 billion. There was nothing about cars.

[chem1st 10]

Resurrection;

 

Doing the deed and I came, then afterwards I laid there just lame.

The resurrection of my erection allowed me to do it again, and afterwards I laid there just lame.

[Tallyman 10]

Thanks to those who posted an entry in the April competition. Lady Agatha will be judging the winner, and will post her decision here. The lucky winner will choose the theme for June!

[Lady Agatha 10]

Well, Mr Blue Owl, I thought this month would be a foregone conclusion but you had some last minute competition! I thought that your piece was enjoyable and thought provoking. For all we know, life is simply a matter of chance. I like the superstition of the lucky coin - because the process of death is so uncertain it is tempting to weave all kinds of myths and superstitions into the little that we know. This was a compelling read and I really cared about what happened to Arthur, so well done.

 

I think I should also comment on Ron Blanco's separate offering. I liked how this slid from humour into horror - this story plays with us much as the two children do. It was a bit Hammer Horror or Tales of the Unexpected - which is ok in my book! It also has a serious undercurrent - how many parents out there really can't cope and don't get help until the worst happens? A good piece of dark humour.

 

greg2 - I loved your wonderful description of the car - especially the fuel consumption and the hilarious gear stick - I really laughed out loud at the thought of that wonderfully inventive piece of kitsch. You also did a great job of Mark's character - recognisable yet not cliched. A humorous, imaginative take on the subject.

 

chem1st - A short piece about which I can find little to say, except that I think I might have seen it before on the back of a toilet door.

 

I declare Mr Blue Owl to be the winner of this month's competition. Congratulations and I look forward to your theme for June.

[Tallyman 10]

Well done, Mr Blue Owl; I also enjoyed your piece very much. It's a credit to your writing that we discover what's going on quite soon, but I still wanted to read to the end as I was enjoying the ride.

 

Like Lady Agatha, I liked Arthur, and cared what happened to him, but in a short space of time you also made me care about Mrs Dawson, and her hopes for Arthur's recovery.

 

Greg2, I did enjoy your portrait of Mark, and the description of the car sucking in petrol 'like a basking shark amongst plankton'. I'm going to say something that makes me sound very stupid here, but: I can see from the reference to Mrs Dawson, and there being two Resurrections at once, that your story is somehow linked with Mr Blue Owl's, and perhaps the second resurrection is that of the Post Office (while the first may be Arthur's), but I've got to confess that I don't entirely get it. This is certainly my fault rather than yours, but would you mind elaborating? It would at least (I say this in an attempt to recover my dignity) provide a useful insight into your thought processes as you constructed this piece...?

 

Good work all round! Tallyman

[mr_blue_owl 10]

Well, Mr Blue Owl, I thought this month would be a foregone conclusion but you had some last minute competition! I thought that your piece was enjoyable and thought provoking. For all we know, life is simply a matter of chance. I like the superstition of the lucky coin - because the process of death is so uncertain it is tempting to weave all kinds of myths and superstitions into the little that we know. This was a compelling read and I really cared about what happened to Arthur, so well done.

 

I think I should also comment on Ron Blanco's separate offering. I liked how this slid from humour into horror - this story plays with us much as the two children do. It was a bit Hammer Horror or Tales of the Unexpected - which is ok in my book! It also has a serious undercurrent - how many parents out there really can't cope and don't get help until the worst happens? A good piece of dark humour.

 

greg2 - I loved your wonderful description of the car - especially the fuel consumption and the hilarious gear stick - I really laughed out loud at the thought of that wonderfully inventive piece of kitsch. You also did a great job of Mark's character - recognisable yet not cliched. A humorous, imaginative take on the subject.

 

chem1st - A short piece about which I can find little to say, except that I think I might have seen it before on the back of a toilet door.

 

I declare Mr Blue Owl to be the winner of this month's competition. Congratulations and I look forward to your theme for June.

 

Thank you for choosing my humble effort

By the way, Arthur went on to make a good recovery and lived to a good old age

Regards

Keith

[mr_blue_owl 10]

Well done, Mr Blue Owl; I also enjoyed your piece very much. It's a credit to your writing that we discover what's going on quite soon, but I still wanted to read to the end as I was enjoying the ride.

 

Like Lady Agatha, I liked Arthur, and cared what happened to him, but in a short space of time you also made me care about Mrs Dawson, and her hopes for Arthur's recovery.

 

Greg2, I did enjoy your portrait of Mark, and the description of the car sucking in petrol 'like a basking shark amongst plankton'. I'm going to say something that makes me sound very stupid here, but: I can see from the reference to Mrs Dawson, and there being two Resurrections at once, that your story is somehow linked with Mr Blue Owl's, and perhaps the second resurrection is that of the Post Office (while the first may be Arthur's), but I've got to confess that I don't entirely get it. This is certainly my fault rather than yours, but would you mind elaborating? It would at least (I say this in an attempt to recover my dignity) provide a useful insight into your thought processes as you constructed this piece...?

 

Good work all round! Tallyman

 

Thank you for your kind words

Most appreciated

Regards

Keith

[Ron Blanco 10]

Congratulations, Mr Blue Owl. A really satisfying story, and I particularly liked how you cleverly twined the two threads together.

 

Greg2, I thought this was a very interesting and amusing read, and I support Tallyman in his call for some additional elaboration.

 

Lady Agatha, thanks for your excellent comments and for setting April's theme.

[greg2 10]

I'm afraid Tallyman and Ron Blanco are crediting me with a higher level of sophistication than I intended: it was purely coincidental that the name I plucked out of the air for Mark's wife or landlady (I never quite decided which) was the same as the name of a character in mr blue owl's piece. I am sure I had read mr blue owl's piece earlier, and perhaps the name Mrs Dawson had lodged in the back of my mind, but at the time of writing it was a random surname which could equally have come out as Mrs Smith.

So the two Resurrections were simply two of these cars on the car transporter. The company Resurection SA is buying up these old cars before it relaunches itself in the UK, so that the old cars do not confuse and cloud Resurrection SA's new image.

I shall try to be more careful with names in future. But I do like the idea that one contribution could interact with another. Perhaps I will try it one month.

 

greg2