Becoming a single mum

[mellydh 10]

hi, i'm new to the forum. I am about to become a single mother. Wow i am so scared of what lies ahead. My son is just 4 weeks old and i have been with my partner for 18 years. Our relationship has just totally broken down which i am extremely sad at and will probably never get over it . Wondered if anybody is in a similar position. Any words of advice??

[coretext 10]

hi, i'm new to the forum. I am about to become a single mother. Wow i am so scared of what lies ahead. My son is just 4 weeks old and i have been with my partner for 18 years. Our relationship has just totally broken down which i am extremely sad at and will probably never get over it . Wondered if anybody is in a similar position. Any words of advice??

 

I'm really sorry to hear that. I wish you all the best for you and your son. I'm sure there are plenty of forumers that will offer you support.

[natasha77 10]

oh i'm really sorry to here that, they are a great bunch on this forum we have been through a difficult patch, but lots of support and kind words from fellow forumers really cheers you up.

 

if you ever need to chat just pm me, i will try to help, i am a qualified nursery nurse and have been for 12 years, and i'm a mum, and if you need any advice let me know.

[funkymiss 10]

Ah Melly, can you see no way of you and your partner patching things up? Is there any way you could see the two of you getting back together? Having a baby must be such a life-altering thing for a couple, maybe he is just not adjusting well and things will get better for you both soon?

[cosywolf 10]

Sorry to hear about that, hun. Very tough with a baby so young. Come visit us in the parenting group, and I'm sure there'll be plenty of tea and sympathy (or chocolate and laughs...whichever you prefer!)

[sTaGeWaLkEr 10]

((hugs Melly))

 

I'm sorry to hear of your situation. I can't begin to imagine how I'd feel breaking up with someone I'd been with for eighteen years. It's beyond comprehension for me.

 

Although things are probably pretty scary for you right now, I'm sure that given time you'll get yourself back on your feet and learn to fly again.

 

Just thought I'd also mention that there's a parenting group here on the forum if you need any help, advice, support or just some general company.

 

[Titian 10]

hi, i'm new to the forum. I am about to become a single mother. Wow i am so scared of what lies ahead. My son is just 4 weeks old and i have been with my partner for 18 years. Our relationship has just totally broken down which i am extremely sad at and will probably never get over it . Wondered if anybody is in a similar position. Any words of advice??

 

Hi mellydh,

 

Welcome to the forum!!!

 

Could your relationship breakdown be a reaction to having a new baby around??? Maybe it will pan out, hopefully, given some time to adjust?

[mellydh 10]

wow, can't believe people have replied so quickly. thanks for the kind words. Unfortunatly our relationship has been deteriating(sure that's not spelt right) for the last 18 mths. We thought we could work things out when i found out i was pregnant but it just isn't working and i don't want to stay together just for our son. He is a wonderful dad though and i hope we stay on good terms.

[rubydazzler 11]

oh that is so sad to read, after so many years together and such a new baby to cope with too ...

 

Have a rubydazzler special hug ... and then nip over and visit the parenting group, I'm sure they'll have lots to say that you'll find useful.

 

It won't solve the situation but it might help you feel a little less isolated.

 

x

[JoeP 11]

hi, i'm new to the forum. I am about to become a single mother. Wow i am so scared of what lies ahead. My son is just 4 weeks old and i have been with my partner for 18 years. Our relationship has just totally broken down which i am extremely sad at and will probably never get over it . Wondered if anybody is in a similar position. Any words of advice??

 

Welcome to SF!

 

Not something I've had experience of, I'm afraid, but all three of you have just gone through a major life experience - a new baby appearing in a long-term relationship. Everything's up in the air.

 

Are you still sharing a house and talking? If so it's possible that things might straighten out. How was your partner during the pregnancy?

 

EDIT - just saw the post about things deteriorating....

 

Sorry to hear that. I guess from a practical perspective it might be worth considering whether you can wait a month or two before any final decisions are made?

[pattricia 575]

Im really sorry to hear this.Lots of people have kids thinking it will bring them closer together,when in fact it has the opposite effect. A baby is very hard work, and the man often feels left out.Dont ever stay together for the sake of the children, as it creates more tension.Kids soon latch on when parents are arguing,and it telephones a message to them that isnt good.Better off without the arguments,which gives a more relaxed situation to everyone.Welcome, love, everyone on here is marvellous.

[Sedge 10]

Im so sorry to hear of your situation, my heart goes out to, it must be a really hard time for you at the moment.

i cant offer much advice, but there are some really great people on the SF, im sure some will be able to offer some.

All the best.