How do I get a job with an Environment Department ???

[Lester_Bigot]

I fancy getting a job with an environmental department, how to I go about this, I'm fed up of having to work for a living

 

I have got plenty of ideas that can be used to reduce carbon emissions, and for my expertise I want a salary of 46000 per annum.

 

My Ideas are

 

1) increase road tax to £3000 per annum.

2) Introduce road charging to £5 per mile

3) charge people for bin emptying, ie £50 per plastic bag (people will have to consider alternative means)

4) Introduce a council green incentive tax of £140 per year

5) scrap cars that are older than 3 years old

6) Increase taxation on petrol

7) food tax of 15% on each item (to reflect the transportation costs and damage to the environment)

8)Introduce a Global warming tax of £299 per annum

 

 

My proposals I believe will reduce emissions, and will help us meet our Kyoto targets

 

No doubt people against will say, this is nothing more than an excuse to increase taxation, but I can assure you, its all about saving the planet.

 

Now I have officially declared myself an environment expert, wheres my cushy job and enoumous salary?

[Escafeldia]

Marvellous! Everyones an expert. You don't want a job in the Environmental Department you want a job with Gordon (Rob Dog) Brown. Why don't you also include

 

a) All persons over 70 years of age to be charged £6000 per annum for the environmental impact of their farts.

 

b) Farmers with cattle and other herbivors to pay £6000 per annum per animal as a "Methane" charge for the gases produced during the digestion of the vegetable matter they eat.

 

c) Only polititians should be allowed to eat Sprout Curry and drink Guinness at the same time. All other citizens will pay £500 per portion eaten.

 

On the other hand just get a job to which your talents obviously are directed - Fantasist. :loopy: