Funny things you have overheard

[AlBal]

I was once standing in Rotherham Bus Station, behind a couple of real throw-backs when I heard the following

 

Chav (a) You know our Geoff's Susan

 

Chav (b) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (nods head)

 

Chav (a) You know, in Rawmarsh

 

Chav (b) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (nods head)

 

Chav (a) She's got a reeeet cat

 

Chav (b) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (nods head)

 

Chav (a) They recken it can play bingo

 

Chav (b) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (nods head)

 

 

I never heard what happened to the Bingo-playing cat of Rawmarsh, but then again, I dont work in Rotherham anymore.

 

Ha ha ha, that really tickled me!!

[donkey]

Two women on a bus, woman one says'' what are you going to call her?''

Woman two: ''Wivony.''

One: '' that's a nice name, how do you spell it.?''

Two:''Yvonne.''

[grahamgraham]

hehe, all very funny storys.

[AtticusFinch]

It doesn't really qualify as something I've overheard, but it was a conversation between others that I became involved in by mistake.

 

About two months ago I was sat on my sofa watching TV on a Saturday evening when my mobile rang. It was a withheld number and as soon as I answered and said hello they hung up. I then carried on watching TV and a few minutes later I got a text message. It said:

 

"Hi Paul. Thanks for tonight, I really enjoyed it. See you soon. Love Lisa xxx" (in text speak).

 

I replied "I'm sorry but you've got the wrong number. This isn't Paul".

 

Honest mistake, I thought, and carried on watching TV.

 

A few minutes later I then got another text saying:

 

"This is the number that Paul gave me. I'm a bit gutted now. I was looking forward to some more action"

 

I couldn't work out if it was genuinely some teenage girl who didn't mind blurting out her sex life to complete strangers, or whether it was some kind of scam to get men round a stranger's house where there'd be people waiting there to rob them. Either way, I didn't reply.

[Norbert]

It doesn't really qualify as something I've overheard, but it was a conversation between others that I became involved in by mistake.

 

About two months ago I was sat on my sofa watching TV on a Saturday evening when my mobile rang. It was a withheld number and as soon as I answered and said hello they hung up. I then carried on watching TV and a few minutes later I got a text message. It said:

 

"Hi Paul. Thanks for tonight, I really enjoyed it. See you soon. Love Lisa xxx" (in text speak).

 

I replied "I'm sorry but you've got the wrong number. This isn't Paul".

 

Honest mistake, I thought, and carried on watching TV.

 

A few minutes later I then got another text saying:

 

"This is the number that Paul gave me. I'm a bit gutted now. I was looking forward to some more action"

 

I couldn't work out if it was genuinely some teenage girl who didn't mind blurting out her sex life to complete strangers, or whether it was some kind of scam to get men round a stranger's house where there'd be people waiting there to rob them. Either way, I didn't reply.

 

That's quite a sophisticated scam, how much did that text cost you?

[EdnaKrabappe]

I was once standing in Rotherham Bus Station, behind a couple of real throw-backs when I heard the following

 

Chav (a) You know our Geoff's Susan

 

Chav (b) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (nods head)

 

Chav (a) You know, in Rawmarsh

 

Chav (b) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (nods head)

 

Chav (a) She's got a reeeet cat

 

Chav (b) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (nods head)

 

Chav (a) They recken it can play bingo

 

Chav (b) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (nods head)

 

 

I never heard what happened to the Bingo-playing cat of Rawmarsh, but then again, I dont work in Rotherham anymore.

Brilliant.

[artisan]

A few weeks ago I was on the bus behind two old ladies, obviously old rivals, the converstion went

 

Ist lady, 'Do you remember Jim?'

 

2nd lady 'Oh Yes I do'

 

Ist lady 'You were very sweet on him when you were younger wernt you?'

 

2nd lady 'Yes, I was, and we were together for quite a time'

 

1st lady 'He died last month you know, were you not invited to the funeral?'

 

The nastiness of the old bag shocked even me.

[karatemma]

My friend was in the "ladies", from the next cubical there was a loud sound of breaking wind. Then from the cubical on the other side of her another old lady's voice called "Is that you Mary?"

 

Now when anyone we know breaks wind we shout it.

:hihi: !!!excellent!!! :hihi:

[littleboo]

We were in Bakewell a few years ago, just parking the car up, an elderly well to do couple were walking by. The Woman turned to the man and said 'I wouldn't p*ss on you if you were on fire' the poor old bloke just said nothing.

 

Another one on the bus was two dole wallers who were on their way to sign on, one exclaimed to the other ' that's it they don't give you any insensitive to work'

[LHarman]

We were in Bakewell a few years ago, just parking the car up, an elderly well to do couple were walking by. The Woman turned to the man and said 'I wouldn't p*ss on you if you were on fire' the poor old bloke just said nothing.

 

Another one on the bus was two dole wallers who were on their way to sign on, one exclaimed to the other ' that's it they don't give you any insensitive to work'

I once overheard a woman talking to her friend at a bus stop, saying how bad it was that her son had to get up at 8am to get to sign on in town, her friend said it was disgusting!!,god help him if he got a job then, hed be buggered!