babychickens Posted October 20, 2006 Share Posted October 20, 2006 out of interest, how many of you are domestic goddesses who manage to spend every moment that your baby is awake with the baby, and yet still manage to keep the house clean, clothes laundered, washing up done, and beautifully presented meals on the table? personally i like a bit of me time - i do all the house work while she's asleep, and am them so pooped that when she's awake i tend to spend a fair amount of time (maybe 1/3 of the time she's awake) slumped on the floor next to her (she's 4 months and a little reticent in learning how to roll over) or slumped on the sofa watching tv while she looks/chews her baby books and toys. does this make me a bad mother? lots of the ladies i know seem to effortlessly have clean houses, fed husbands, and babies which never seem to be left alone... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scoop Posted October 20, 2006 Share Posted October 20, 2006 out of interest, how many of you are domestic goddesses who manage to spend every moment that your baby is awake with the baby, and yet still manage to keep the house clean, clothes laundered, washing up done, and beautifully presented meals on the table? personally i like a bit of me time - i do all the house work while she's asleep, and am them so pooped that when she's awake i tend to spend a fair amount of time (maybe 1/3 of the time she's awake) slumped on the floor next to her (she's 4 months and a little reticent in learning how to roll over) or slumped on the sofa watching tv while she looks/chews her baby books and toys. does this make me a bad mother? lots of the ladies i know seem to effortlessly have clean houses, fed husbands, and babies which never seem to be left alone... You should've come round my house when sccop junior was a baby. Chaos! Like you I was too tired to do much other than care for the baby. If I were to have another one, I'm afraid I would be employing a cleaning lady, a chef and a dog walker! (when does paul Mc Cartneys divorce come through? Looks like I'll be needing a considerably richer husband!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scoop Posted October 20, 2006 Share Posted October 20, 2006 Also, remember - babies also like me time. They dont want to be stimulated every waking moment. That time she spends looking at the baby gym, chewing the book, trying to roll over are all very important parts of her development. Sounds to me like you're getting the balance right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
medusa Posted October 20, 2006 Share Posted October 20, 2006 I was going to say that too- it's important for babies to learn that just because you're not playing with them constantly doesn't mean that you're leaving them. If she's chilled and happy while she's there (I mean that assuming you go to her if she's unhappy) then giving her some time to explore the world her way is just fine, as long as the time that you spend with her you're paying her full attention. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clairy Posted October 20, 2006 Share Posted October 20, 2006 You are not alone!! My best friend is a domestic goddess and has just popped out her 4th child! I, however, look like the worst mother on earth next to her! I spend very little time with my daughter during the week and then try to make up for it a bit at weekends, but she plays really well on her own, which I think encourages a higher concentration level and boredom threshold. Anyway, could go on and on, suffice it to say, most people are not mother of the year! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zebra Posted October 20, 2006 Share Posted October 20, 2006 Hear hear, if only I was like that. My washing pile is perpetually out of control, something, somewhere always needs cleaning or tidying up, at least one room is a tip at any time and the others barely recognisable sometimes. I prioritise my girls over everything else, especially because they are twins and having two reduces the time you can spend with each of them as an individual. Typically twin development is slower because you always have to have one playing alone or kept safe whilst you do the risky stuff with the other, like trying first steps etc. Playing together is possible and we do lots of that and lots of taking turns. An extra Zaphod Beeblebrox head and another pair of arms would probably help. However, my partner and I made a concerted effort to load the washing machine whilst warming bottles, clean the dishes whilst the girls eat in their highchairs and so on, multitasking makes life easier. I make sure I spend time with each child doing words, walking, generally silliness and reading, ensuring they have individual time and stimulus. I also see to them having chill out time and/or tv time and I do leave them to play for short periods whilst I do other things. We probably then spend an hour or so after they go to bed doing housework, tidying the days chaos, cleaning the highchairs and floors of their most recent deposits etc etc. Our house leaves a lot to be desired but it's getting better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NatalieSheff Posted October 21, 2006 Share Posted October 21, 2006 gees my house is a tip - find it so depressing, i iron when hes in play pen and do computer work as he sleeps, homework at his bed time and clean as i go. sometimes feel really guilty if im trying to tidy and hes crying for attention or if im hoovering, but then feel awful is house mess when hubby comes home. anyone fancy cleaning for me? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PIF_Tails Posted October 21, 2006 Share Posted October 21, 2006 I only manage time on my computer as I nurse whilst doing it !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aussie80 Posted October 21, 2006 Share Posted October 21, 2006 it's nice to hear other mums feel the same! with my first child it was bliss....she was a pretty content baby and would be fine on her play mat/chair etc amusing herself. she did have her moments and we always had our together time. with my second (who's 5weeks) it seems he's the total opposite. As a person who likes to be kept busy, physically busy i mean, i'm feeling a bit lazy cos he seems to like to always being held, the most i get out of him is about 1/2hr sleep on his own before he wakes up and i'm not able to do all the things i mean to do, like the housework/cleaning. i'm not complaining about having to be with him all the time, i do love the time i spend with him, but it does seem to be 24/7 lately and if i want to do anything it's a case of waiting til 'dad' gets home til i can. I've just brought one of those baby carriers.......i'll let you know how it goes!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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