Story: 'The Night Workers'

[hazel 11]

This is also sparetime work

 

hazel

 

The Night Workers

[mikomi 10]

Hazel.

 

Elegantly written,I liked it very much.

[hazel 11]

Mikomi

Thanks for the feedback, it's very difficult to view one's own work and if no one says anything, you never know how the reader feels.

Pleased you enjoyed it

 

hazel

[sauerkraut 10]

That's a very clever piece of writing. I got completely the wrong idea from the opening sentence and was given a big surprise ín the closing sentence - which I assume was the plan! Maybe you could have just said the sound of the phone summoned her back, rather than called her back "to the office" (so that the intrigue is kept right to the end) - but perhaps others more on the ball than I will have twigged by then anyway.

 

I like the way the descriptive writing really evokes the scene. Descriptions (whether of situations, atmosphere or simply surroundings) are something I always struggle with.

 

I enjoyed reading it.

[pattricia 574]

This is very good Hazel, you are getting better with each story.