Sunak Crosses The Atlantic?

[cressida]

IT WAS Christmas Day at the Sunaks’ 


Their Yorkshire mansion was full of good cheer


They were California dreamin’


They’d be Stateside in less than a year.


When the PM unwrapped his presents


His delight could not be surpassed


He got a wallet to keep his Green Card in


And Bermuda shorts styled at half-mast.


Akshata was gifted a riveting book 


A best-selling novel? Not quite. 


It was a guide to American tax law


And getting non-dom status right.


Said Sunak: ‘When we lose the election


We’ll head to Heathrow straight away


By the time Starmer’s droning outside No 10


We’ll be flying first-class to LA.


‘I’ll be rather sad to leave Yorkshire


With its snow and its wind and its rain


I know Santa Monica could never compare


But we’ll just have to face up to the pain.


‘I never quite mastered Tyke sayings 


But when locals uttered these phrases:


‘Rishi, tha’s a reet wazzock’,


I think they were singing my praises.


‘Oh look, a Christmas card from Suella!


A surprise, when you think that I sacked her.


At this joyful season of peace and goodwill 


Could it be that regrets have now racked her?


‘Her message is the words of a carol, 


But I’m afraid her tone is quite scorning


It says: “I saw 300 migrant boats come sailing by 


On Christmas Day in the morning.”


‘Akshata, darling, why look so glum


When our plans are nearing perfection?’


Said Akshata: ‘A dread thought just crossed my mind: 


What if you win the election?’


Said Sunak: ‘That’s not going to happen


The Conservatives are a force that’s long spent


We’ll be like dinosaurs hit by an asteroid,


A mass extinction event.


‘From Covid to climate to migrants


To war memorials with yobs on


We’ve brought 13 years of disaster,


An omnishambles with knobs on.


‘So to our Pacific penthouse we’ll repair


I’ll write my memoirs, you’ll go shopping


While Starmer makes Britain even worse


With no chance of any boats stopping.’

[Mister M]

[The_DADDY]

[cressida]

It was all rather tongue in cheek🤫

19 minutes ago, The_DADDY said:

 

Is that pretty tom?

[The_DADDY]

5 minutes ago, cressida said:

It was all rather tongue in cheek🤫

 

Is that pretty tom?

I believe it is. It's the picture from his old La Chambre members card.

[hackey lad]

32 minutes ago, Mister M said:

Didn’t know Rishi had a big helmet.

[Mister M]

19 hours ago, hackey lad said:

Didn’t know Rishi had a big helmet.

Yeah, he swizzles it around very fast to do a helicopter, so he can get from place to place in double quick time.