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If You Could Live Your Life Again,what Would You Change ?

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On 19/12/2019 at 18:17, DerbyTup said:

 

In terms of "career" - I don't have any regrets as such.  I've had a rich and varied career in many different industries and I've done a wide range of jobs from things very junior to very senior.  Most of all I've met some fantastic people along the way and been to some fantastic places as well.  I can look back and think..."maybe I'd have gone further and faster if I'd done this or that", but then again I'd have missed out on some very rich life experiences along the way perhaps.  I've been lucky in many ways, but I also think that it's about how you view and approach life.  I'm outgoing, I like change and I don't mind taking risks.  That's not for everyone I appreciate, but for me it's essential.  I easily get bored of doing the same things the same way.  I won't even drive into town and back the same way.  I love variety.  

 

In terms of "relationships" I'd say it's a bit of a mixed bag.  There are some relationships that I was in where I should have exited much sooner.  There are other relationships I was in where I should have cherished them more and treated them with greater respect. I put that down to immaturity, although it was fun at the time!   If it's true that all your life experiences flash before you just before you die, there are some relationships that I'd put on "fast-forward" and others I'd watch frame by frame, in slow motion! 😃  I was always reluctant to commit to a relationship, until I met my other half.  Even then I was a bit reluctant!  But after 7 years of dating her she finally persuaded me that I was getting fatter and balder and needed to get married sharpish!  So I did.  22 years later I'm still glad I did!  

 

Not sure what is meant by "change another time zone"?  I have lived and worked in different time zones and really enjoyed experiencing differences in culture amongst different people.  It's fascinating.  Not least, to learn how other cultures see us.  If the question is about living in a different era then that's really difficult, but I'd probably choose the late 20's or 30's when people seemed to dress smartly, act courteously towards each other and things seemed to be on the up.  

 

I suppose my biggest regret really is when I've hurt someone's feelings.  It's mostly been unintentional, but I can be a bit insensitive to others at times and I also don't suffer fools gladly.  There have definitely been times when I've let folks have it with both barrels - and I've usually regretted that.  It may have made me feel better at the time, but afterwards I've felt bad about it for ages.  And people never forget.  They might forgive, but they never forget. 

 

I was at an ex-colleague's funeral a few weeks ago and I bumped into a guy that used to be my boss, 20 years ago.  Now, you'll have to take my word for it, but this guy was a bit of a tosser.  One day he called me out, in front of colleagues, for a bit of criticism.  In fact, it wasn't one thing, it was several things.  We were in a meeting at the time and at the end of the meeting, after he'd gone, my colleagues asked me why he seemed to have such a problem with me?  That was it!  That's what I was feeling as well, but the fact they'd all noticed it just lit my fire.  I went to find him in his office, walked in, and asked him what his problem was?  I then proceeded to give him the biggest bollocking he's ever had in his life.  He literally went white with fear, because boy, I was angry.  No swearing, no threats, but as these words were tumbling out of my mouth I could tell he was bricking it and at the same time, a little voice in my head was saying, "Shut up!  You'll ruin your career!".   But I didn't care.  Anyhow, back to the funeral the other week and the first thing I did when I saw him was to go over, smile, shake his hand and ask him how he was doing?  And his response was friendly, but the next thing he said to all around us was, "I remember being in a meeting with him some years ago and I must have said something that upset him, because he burst into my office afterwards and gave me the biggest bollocking I've ever had".  He was making a joke of it, but obviously it was still fresh in his mind after all those years.  I laughed about it too and I reassured him that I have mellowed a lot in later years and if that same thing happened again now, I'd knock next time! 😃 

 

 

 

That is a nice reply Derby Tup.  Very honest.  My biggest regret is my first serious boyfriend.  I've never been out with anyone like him since (i'm now 37) so I suppose it was a learning curve.

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17 hours ago, Agent Orange said:

Nothing. Everything, whether good or bad, happens for a reason.  Instead, I would rather concentrate my energy doing all the good stuff from now until death.

Agree.  As my mum used to say, "What's for you, won't pass you by." 

 

On death she would say that it was just "His / her day to die." 

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11 hours ago, Baron99 said:

"What's for you, won't pass you by." 

 

Does that also apply to people who are in extreme poverty and starving to death?

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Guest makapaka

I smoked - packed in now but wish I’d never started.

 

I wasn’t a bad looking kid when I was younger and I wasn’t careful about lasses feelings which when I met my mrs I realised I needed to be and should have been sooner.

 

i worried too much about daft things  - to the point of making myself ill with worry - which I still struggle with now but can control it better. 

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12 minutes ago, makapaka said:

I smoked - packed in now but wish I’d never started.

 

I wasn’t a bad looking kid when I was younger and I wasn’t careful about lasses feelings which when I met my mrs I realised I needed to be and should have been sooner.

 

i worried too much about daft things  - to the point of making myself ill with worry - which I still struggle with now but can control it better. 

But you looked cool smoking though right? I was absolutely positive I did. 

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Sat at the moment with a glass of Tamdhu & thinking about the initial post, while totally ignoring Waldo's post above, as it doesn't warrant any response. 

 

Don't have any regrets in life.  If you do, think back to the time when you made some major decisions, (which with hindsight you MIGHT now think you regret), then REMEMBER why you chose the direction / decision you did because at the time, that's what best suited you or your circumstances.  I can certainly think of a few. 

 

Life's.to short to worry about the past but you can still change tomorrow. 

 

 

Edited by Baron99

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6 hours ago, Baron99 said:

...while totally ignoring Waldo's post above, as it doesn't warrant any response. 

Please accept my apology Baron99, genuinely.

 

While I do find the notion you posited philosophical troubling, I was clumsy and careless in my expressed objection to it.

 

Also you said it was associated with your mom, and as I don’t know anything about you, her, or your relationship with your mom, I should have been a hell of a lot more delicate and sensitive,

 

I’m sorry,

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Guest makapaka
10 hours ago, tinfoilhat said:

But you looked cool smoking though right? I was absolutely positive I did. 

Totally mate 😀

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On 20/12/2019 at 23:55, Waldo said:

I think I’d spend more time posting on internet forums about what I’d like to do differently if I could live my life again. Hmmm...

 

Recently, I’ve been thinking how weak and puny we humans are. We are subject to all kinds of universal laws, like gravity for example. A whole bunch of stuff which we don’t create, but still, acts upon us, weather we like it or not. You and me are pretty insignificant, and it doesn’t really matter.

 

EDIT, forgot to add, also less thinking and more sha**ing my brains out please.

Had to laugh at this post. I agree with it.

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Not sure I'd change too much. I'm a great believer in that you are the sum of your experiences and I like to think that I'm a fairly decent chap now so changing anything might lead to unforeseen consequences.

 

For the geeks out there (myself included!)  - Star Trek, the Next Generation did an episode on this that I found fascinating.

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tapestry_(Star_Trek:_The_Next_Generation)

 

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On 22/12/2019 at 06:53, Waldo said:

Please accept my apology Baron99, genuinely.

 

While I do find the notion you posited philosophical troubling, I was clumsy and careless in my expressed objection to it.

 

Also you said it was associated with your mom, and as I don’t know anything about you, her, or your relationship with your mom, I should have been a hell of a lot more delicate and sensitive,

 

I’m sorry,

Thank you, Waldo.  Apology accepted. 

 

That's the problem with posts / emails etc, sometimes the tome gets lost in the message. 

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Ok. Time for a new thread before I go out.! 

 

Do you ever ever think to yourself of something you didn’t do, but wish you had ? 

 

I suppose youve heard my wish before but its still the same. I wasted 4 years working in an office before going to train as a state registered nurse. Although my wage as a student nurse was exactly half of what I earned in an office, I never regretted it, and soon caught up moneywise when I qualified.

 

So..... what would you change ? , is there anything you regret ? Would you have done anything differently ? Married a different person ?

 

Come on now it’s nearly New Years Eve . Wish upon a Star for a laugh.

 

 

See you all in the New Year.

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