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I attended physio because of pain on my right side. Fortunately it is now cured but after about five weeks I got asked if I would fill in a  questionaire, which I did. One of the questions was, are you having difficulty getting dressed ? Which I was, but what are they going to do about it ?  Nothing. I am still awaiting my servant, so why ask ? 

Another was, are you lonely ? Well if I am, what is the person asking the question going to do about it, invite me out for the day with thier family ? Invite me to have dinner with them ? Again, no , so why ask ?

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12 minutes ago, spilldig said:

I am still awaiting my servant, so why ask ?  Another was, are you this Well if I am, what is the person asking the question going to do about it, invite me out for the day with thier family ? Invite me to have dinner with them ? Again, no , so why ask ?

6

The reason for my posting this thread was because I thought it was just me that didn't want to live alone and others didn't see it as a problem.

In fact 28% of households are single, people living with others may well be single. Is this just modern times and not an issue? It seems like an issue for you.

 

Why have we become a nation of singletons?

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@Spilldig
If it had been me completing that form,  I would have tried to find out why the question was being asked about loneliness.

My reason for saying that is because there could have been an opportunity-it could have lead to something. I am not saying you should have done that, but I definitely would have.

Edited by Janus

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El cid,
You don't have to explain why you started the thread, but I am pleased that you did. It is an interesting topic, to me at least.

I think the reasons why  people live alone are many and varied.

I live alone, but am unsure if I could cope with having anyone else living here. (Probably more accurate to say that the other person would not be able to cope with me).  Staying over "at theirs" a night or two, or the person staying here would be fine for a day or so.

May I ask, are you lonely? I am curious why you wanted another person (male or female) to be around. There is nothing at all wrong with that by the way. You sound easy going & tolerent-these are good traits.

 I feel lonely often. I am trying  to be proactive to bring about change in that area. Increasing my social circle I guess.

I think it is fair to say that people who live alone and are not lonely engage in a socially rich environment, whatever that may be to them.



 

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28 minutes ago, Janus said:

May I ask, are you lonely? I am curious why you wanted another person (male or female) to be around. There is nothing at all wrong with that by the way. You sound easy going & tolerent-these are good traits.
 

1

I never consider myself as lonely, but I have never wanted to live alone, always wanting a partner, but rarely successful. I do like people, but I am not outgoing enough to have a lot of friends, wrong hobbies too. Going online too much does not help.

This is what Google says about loneliness "Loneliness typically includes anxious feelings about a lack of connection or communication with other beings, both in the present and extending into the future."

 

 

I do have enough evening drinking pals and a dog, so I do get out enough, but no one to come back home to.

 

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19 minutes ago, El Cid said:

I never consider myself as lonely, but I have never wanted to live alone, always wanting a partner, but rarely successful. I do like people, but I am not outgoing enough to have a lot of friends, wrong hobbies too. Going online too much does not help.

This is what Google says about loneliness "Loneliness typically includes anxious feelings about a lack of connection or communication with other beings, both in the present and extending into the future."

 

 

I do have enough evening drinking pals and a dog, so I do get out enough, but no one to come back home to.

 

You do have someone to come home to,  Mans BEST Freind. :hihi:

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7 hours ago, El Cid said:

The reason for my posting this thread was because I thought it was just me that didn't want to live alone and others didn't see it as a problem.

In fact 28% of households are single, people living with others may well be single. Is this just modern times and not an issue? It seems like an issue for you.

 

Why have we become a nation of singletons?

My issue with it is the NHS wasting money on pointless surveys, Another is asking you to rate your GP. that one has a free post reply. Pointless, it will change nothing.

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Quite a number of years ago El Sid, I was having a phone conversation with  Tara (not her real name) whom I knew quite well.

She had quite an active social life, other female friends to have nights out with etc,  and her work was centered around people -always busy. She was a divorcee, lived alone in a decent size house-not a small flat in a highrise.

At the time I was seeing someone, about once per week, I was working full time plus overtime, and very busy  renovating a house I had just moved in to. In the phone conversation with Tara   (in reference to our respective situations) I said to her, "the problem is there are too many gaps ". She instantly understood exactly  what I meant without the need for an explanation. 

It's a strange sort of feeling. You can have the  most stimulating day/night/week whatever, but when you walk through that front door you feel the gaps

Edited by Janus

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That's an excellent phrase that one. Im no fan of Christmas but I feel the gaps quite a bit then and I'm not on my own that much. The rest of the year I try to avoid the places where the gaps are if I can.

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Interesting topic. I'm a bit of a "loner" in the accepted sense of the word. During my twenties I spent much more time in solitary activities and actively avoided my family at such times as Christmas. I was an only child at a time when people had large families so perhaps I have an innate resilience to being alone. I've just got on with it. 

One thing I've always found interesting is that people seem more willing to talk to you when you're alone. They don't do so when I'm with my OH.  

 

As mentioned above loneliness is seen by health professionals and researchers as having negative health connotations. 

 

If youre despeate for company and a sociable  petson, loneliness must be terrible

Edited by Ridgewalk
......

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On 1/5/2019 at 7:11 PM, spilldig said:

My issue with it is the NHS wasting money on pointless surveys, Another is asking you to rate your GP. that one has a free post reply. Pointless, it will change nothing.

 

Given that loneliness has health implications, early death, depression other psychological problems, it mayhelp them target services. I went to a meeting several years ago ( Political) and a councillor read out the figures for over 65s in my council ward.

 

Having said that I largely take your point. 

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