Do you hate social gatherings?

[26b-6 16]

I do, I dread this time of year.  I believe (not diagnosed by any professional) I have a part introvert schizoid type personality disorder.  I've always hated most social gatherings and have often gone to great lengths to avoid them.  I've always struggled developing close relationships, I hate crowds, hugging type people, shaking hands, public transport or any form of of 'personal space invasion'  Avoiding these situations is becoming  increasingly difficult  but no more bearable..  My daughter aged 6 'is so cute and adorable' and whilst its flattering she receives so much loved attention I cannot bear it.  I feel really uncomfortable and angry when 'well meaning folk' invade my home,  try to hug me, making pointless small talk,  tell me to 'cheer up' how to feel and how we're somehow obligated to attend their annoying social gatherings.

[Guest]

47 minutes ago, 26b-6 said:

I do, I dread this time of year.  I believe (not diagnosed by any professional) I have a part introvert schizoid type personality disorder.  I've always hated most social gatherings and have often gone to great lengths to avoid them.  I've always struggled developing close relationships, I hate crowds, hugging type people, shaking hands, public transport or any form of of 'personal space invasion'  Avoiding these situations is becoming  increasingly difficult  but no more bearable..  My daughter aged 6 'is so cute and adorable' and whilst its flattering she receives so much loved attention I cannot bear it.  I feel really uncomfortable and angry when 'well meaning folk' invade my home,  try to hug me, making pointless small talk,  tell me to 'cheer up' how to feel and how we're somehow obligated to attend their annoying social gatherings.

I hated those "team buildings" back in the days.  Especially those with "lets spread  positive energy" and "we are all one big happy family"  mantra. 

reminds me of the communist system and all that collectivization rubbish 

 

And I agree with you. I dont want to spend my free time in those social gatherings. I rather play xbox and watch Netflix. 

Edited December 10, 2018 by Guest

[Jomie 30]

26b-6 - no need to diagnose yourself with a personality disorder. There is nothing wrong with your dislike of social gatherings. Lots of people are the same. There is no law that says you have to like/attend these functions. Think of ways to deal with this. Perhaps honesty would be the best way - tell your host the truth and maybe agree to attend the function for a short time then depart. Otherwise, just thank them for the invite and say that you do not feel able to attend.  Introverts have hidden strengths - look for yours and do not berate yourself for not being a social type of person. You have every right to be who you are -  we do not have to fit a mould to suit other people’s expectations. 

[bendix 10]

Why does everyone claim to have some kind of 'disorder' or illness these days?  Are we so starved of attention that we need to make ourselves more interesting.

 

No like parties is not 'part introvert schizoid personality disorder.'    It's just not liking parties.  Nothing wrong with that at all.

 

I was watching School on BBC this week.  Every little brat who didn't know how to behave because their parents are too last to discipline them was evidently ADHD and on drugs.   Nope, they're just brats.   And don't get me started on 'anxiety disorder'.   There is no such thing - it's just being anxious, a perfectly normal part of life.

[tinfoilhat 11]

Don't go, or don't invite people round. Drop junior off at her social gatherings. Just say you're working or have somewhere else to be. You'll soon drop off everyone's social radar.

[Guest]

17 minutes ago, bendix said:

Why does everyone claim to have some kind of 'disorder' or illness these days?  Are we so starved of attention that we need to make ourselves more interesting.

 

No like parties is not 'part introvert schizoid personality disorder.'    It's just not liking parties.  Nothing wrong with that at all.

 

 

Oh, you are so wrong about anxiety disorder! I had that when I was younger and it was hell. Its nothing like "normal"  anxiety feeling.

chocking, sweating, feels like suffocating, cant talk, rapid heartbeat, ..nothing like normal part of life.

However, it can be solved  and reduce to minimum, but it takes lots of work and time.

Edited December 10, 2018 by Guest

[bendix 10]

4 minutes ago, croat77 said:

 

Oh, you are so wrong about anxiety disorder! I had that when I was younger and it was hell. Its nothing like "normal"  anxiety feeling.

chocking, sweating, feels like suffocating, cant talk, rapid heartbeat, ..nothing like normal part of life.

However, it can be solved  and reduce to minimum, but it takes lots of work and time.

Yes.  That's another consistent theme; everyone who says they have anxiety disorder describes horrific symptons which, frankly, don't seem particularly horrific at all.   Pretty much sounds like being a normal teenager to me, and something everyone goes through.

 

 

[alchresearch 214]

[Cyclone 10]

3 hours ago, 26b-6 said:

I do, I dread this time of year.  I believe (not diagnosed by any professional) I have a part introvert schizoid type personality disorder.  I've always hated most social gatherings and have often gone to great lengths to avoid them.  I've always struggled developing close relationships, I hate crowds, hugging type people, shaking hands, public transport or any form of of 'personal space invasion'  Avoiding these situations is becoming  increasingly difficult  but no more bearable..  My daughter aged 6 'is so cute and adorable' and whilst its flattering she receives so much loved attention I cannot bear it.  I feel really uncomfortable and angry when 'well meaning folk' invade my home,  try to hug me, making pointless small talk,  tell me to 'cheer up' how to feel and how we're somehow obligated to attend their annoying social gatherings.

Who is "invading" your home?  Friends and family that you have invited?

 

Hugging is fairly easy to avoid isn't it though, just don't stand too close, and tell people you're not very tactile, they'll remember and stop doing something that makes you feel uncomfortable.

1 hour ago, bendix said:

Yes.  That's another consistent theme; everyone who says they have anxiety disorder describes horrific symptons which, frankly, don't seem particularly horrific at all.   Pretty much sounds like being a normal teenager to me, and something everyone goes through.

 

 

Being dismissive of mental health issues that you have no experience of nor expertise in is probably some kind of disorder.

[bendix 10]

8 minutes ago, Cyclone said:

Who is "invading" your home?  Friends and family that you have invited?

 

Hugging is fairly easy to avoid isn't it though, just don't stand too close, and tell people you're not very tactile, they'll remember and stop doing something that makes you feel uncomfortable.

Being dismissive of mental health issues that you have no experience of nor expertise in is probably some kind of disorder.

 

How would you know if I have experience or not?  One person's anxiety disorder, is another person's tough day that they will just struggle through.  That's the whole point.  There is no measurable definition - it all relates to how we 'feel'.  We have been so sanitised today to explore and exaggerate our feelings that people don't feel complete without a disorder or two.

 

Whatever happened to just coping and getting on with things, even when you're feeling anxious or nervous.  On one School last week, a 13 year old girl was asked to speak in front of her class.  She couldn't, because it's a hard thing to do as a teenager.  Most of us suffered similar worries back then.  But . . lo and behold . . instead of her difficulty being attributed to being a shy teenager who didn't want to be laughed at by her classmates, her reluctance as attributed to . . . you guessed it . . .anxiety disorder.

 

[Padders 2,865]

Bendix, I agree with you 90%..  I get absolutely fed up and bored, but I get on with life.. another person would be suffering from depression.

[Albert smith 11]

Now't wrong with liking one's own company, I hate public gatherings and family get togethers  that are often just people being nice to each other because that is what is expected.

The best part of ,my day is the early morning walk in the woods ,just me the dogs and nature to contend with better than any social gathering on the Planet,