Is the age of chivalry dead?

[altus 540]

Stop describing Women by their body parts for starters. I could describe you using a part of your body . Something like. You Little Pri _.

It's quite clear you know you're talking nonsense as you are, again, resorting to insults rather than answer questions.

[sgtkate 10]

It’s just something men used to do.Its probably predominantly older men that still do it as i imagine they see it as something nice to do that makes them feel a bit better about themselves.

 

There’s no need to get too deep into it. It’s not hurting anybody.

 

As someone said above - if a woman does not want the seat they only have to say no.

 

Men used to lay capes over puddles, squire women around the park etc - it’s all a bit mental of you get too deep into it.

 

We do loads of things that are odd for no reason - dining etiquette etc

 

That's the thing, doing something because you are conditioned to do it rather than understanding why it's a decent thing to do (like holding a door for someone of either gender) surely removes any courtesy from the action doesn't it? And yeah, totally overthinking this one! If a guy tried to give up his seat for me I'd probably look around for the disabled or elderly person who I am clearly blocking getting to the seat!

[Sierra 22]

But still noone is able to say *WHY* it's a nice gesture! What is special about a women? Why wouldn't you give your seat up to another man (assuming he's not disabled etc), or why shouldn't a women give up her seat to a man? Can you please tell me what makes women more deserving of the seat than a man?

 

It's just an absolutely ridiculous idea that somehow you are being a better person because you gave your seat to a woman...do the guys who do it go home thinking they are amazing or something? I genuinely cannot get my head around this.

 

Kate, please...

 

You are way, way overthinking this. Anyone is free to give up their seat to anyone else. Isn't that wonderful? That you could do something nice for someone else, just because you feel like it? YOU DO NOT NEED A REASON! THERE DOES NOT HAVE TO BE A REASON.

 

There's really nothing to get your head around. If a man (or anyone else for that matter) offers you their seat, you can accept graciously, or you can politely decline their offer.

 

On second thought, why is it a nice gesture? For the same reason it's nice to let someone with only a loaf of bread go in front of me and my cartful of stuff at the store. It shows consideration for others and the ability to put someone else's needs before my own.

 

It doesn't make me amazing or better. It makes me considerate. And that's all.

[PRESLEY 1,229]

It's quite clear you know you're talking nonsense as you are, again, resorting to insults rather than answer questions.

 

I dont answer your questions I just treat you with the Contemp your description of Women deserves. Grow up its not big and its not clever.

[monkey104 10]

But why? Do you think women are less able to stand than men? It's actually a quite insulting attitude to have towards women rather than being courteous.

 

Well when I offer my seat to a women and if she is offended then I will apologise.

It’s never happened yet and I daresay it never will.

It’s been nice but I am out!

Edited March 19, 2018 by monkey104

[Cyclone 10]

No wonder the world is in <removed>. No one has to give there seat up or infact hold a door open for someone . Ill educate you ignorant planks, its called having good manners. Courtisy (spelling) and above all being a Gentle man. Personal pride makes a Gentlemen if you aint got that theres no hope and Karma will have its way. Explanation WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND. Youll soon be aware its happening when your going through a door and your hands are full, shopping ect, and someone lets it slam in your faces.

 

I hold a door open for people, sex and gender are irrelevant.

I give up my seat to people that have more need for it than me. Sex and gender don't mean you have more need for it, so otherwise it's first come first served. It's not courtesy or being a gentle man it's a patronising anachronism to try to give your seat to someone simply because their female.

 

---------- Post added 19-03-2018 at 18:57 ----------

 

Spoken like a True Chauvenist. I will always give my seat up for a lady maybe one day when Im in need of a seat a lady will give her seat up for me.

 

The implication being that you think they are in need simply because they're female. Terribly sexist.

 

---------- Post added 19-03-2018 at 18:59 ----------

 

Why do you keep saying Vagina. Is there something wrong with you. (Perv) or dont you like women or summat or have you just been dumped or probably got bullied by an older sister whilst trying to grow up, obviously unsuccesfuly, or just didn't get the required attention from your Mommy. Or Just a Woman Hater in General. You have no respect for Women. Get urgent Therapy.

 

Does that word make you feel uncomfortable?

 

---------- Post added 19-03-2018 at 19:00 ----------

 

If it's a nice gesture for a man to give up his seat for a woman; it must also be a nice gesture for a woman to give up her seat for a man! Question, would the men who are giving up their seats for women, just because they're women; also be giving up their seats for other men, just because they're men?

 

I don't understand why the existence (or not) of dangly bits between our legs should at all dictate who merits a seat on public transport.

 

All that said, it's something I struggle with too. Well, from my point of view, everyone is equal, and does not merit special treatment unless they have a specific need as an individual. The bit I struggle with is what's expected by society, men are expected to be a certain way, and so are women, and we're expected to interact with each other, in a certain way.

 

It would probably lead to a situation where no-one would be sat, because they were all trying desperately to be a 'good person' and give their seat away. Amusing, but pointless.

 

---------- Post added 19-03-2018 at 19:01 ----------

 

It’s just something men used to do.Its probably predominantly older men that still do it as i imagine they see it as something nice to do that makes them feel a bit better about themselves.

 

There’s no need to get too deep into it. It’s not hurting anybody.

 

As someone said above - if a woman does not want the seat they only have to say no.

 

Men used to lay capes over puddles, squire women around the park etc - it’s all a bit mental of you get too deep into it.

 

We do loads of things that are odd for no reason - dining etiquette etc

 

So younger men who can see the behaviour as rather patronising and don't do it shouldn't be criticised. Accept that times change.

The age of chivalry is not dead as the OP changed, the behaviour they describe is outdated and weird, potentially mildly offensive.

[PRESLEY 1,229]

I hold a door open for people, sex and gender are irrelevant.

I give up my seat to people that have more need for it than me. Sex and gender don't mean you have more need for it, so otherwise it's first come first served. It's not courtesy or being a gentle man it's a patronising anachronism to try to give your seat to someone simply because their female.

 

---------- Post added 19-03-2018 at 18:57 ----------

 

 

The implication being that you think they are in need simply because they're female. Terribly sexist.

 

---------- Post added 19-03-2018 at 18:59 ----------

 

 

Does that word make you feel uncomfortable?

 

Well if givin up my seat for Female is Sexist Im Guilty . Now what else do you wanna pick the bones of. Cyclone/ Halibut.

[ANGELFIRE1 10]

Sorry to say this, but it's for the oiks on here. Manners maketh the man. Here endeth the lesson.

 

Angel1.

[Cyclone 10]

Three of the seats were occupied by middle aged men. Considering that the majority of the standing occupants were female I was very surprised that none of them offered their seats to the females.

I know that we are in the age of equality and rights for women and rightly so but I could not bring myself to stay seated while there are women stood in my presence without offering up my seat.

 

Sierra, remember that this was the OP.

There is an implied criticism of the middle aged men and presumably all other men who don't give up seats like monkey104.

 

---------- Post added 19-03-2018 at 19:04 ----------

 

Sorry to say this, but it's for the oiks on here. Manners maketh the man. Here endeth the lesson.

 

Angel1.

 

Whilst you're in teacher mode, can you explain why it's good manners to offer women a seat but not other men. I await with bated breath.

[Guest makapaka]

So younger men who can see the behaviour as rather patronising and don't do it shouldn't be criticised. Accept that times change.

The age of chivalry is not dead as the OP changed, the behaviour they describe is outdated and weird, potentially mildly offensive.

 

I don’t think anyone should be criticised.

 

I accept that times change.

 

I would say being offended by it is equally weird.

[RiffRaff 10]

It's just the way you were brought up.

"Manners maketh man", and all that.

Hold a door open/offer a seat to a female.

Don't rest your elbows on the food table.

Ask if it's OK to leave same.

Putting your knife and fork together when your meal's finished.

Don't sniff - use a hanky.

Don't start your meal until everyone's been served...

 

There are probably more "rules" that I've forgotten.

I was just told that it was simply "good manners".

[Guest makapaka]

It's just the way you were brought up.

"Manners maketh man", and all that.

Hold a door open/offer a seat to a female.

Don't rest your elbows on the food table.

Ask if it's OK to leave same.

Putting your knife and fork together when your meal's finished.

Don't sniff - use a hanky.

Don't start your meal until everyone's been served...

 

There are probably more "rules" that I've forgotten.

I was just told that it was simply "good manners".

 

Exactly.

 

We do loads of odd things.

 

I think most women probably appreciate a bit of chivalry if it’s not done in a patronising way.

 

As with a lot of these type of threads the only people saying it’s offendive / inappropriate are men posting on behalf of women.

 

As if they need the help/assistance.......maybe I’ve stumbled across some irony there...

Edited March 19, 2018 by makapaka