Tricks to play on apprentices?

[Cycleracer 10]

tartan paint, sparks for the grinder, left handed spanner/screwdriver, long stand, 6ft of fallopian tubing, bucket of steam, glass hammer, etc etc etc. Theyve all been done to death.

 

Yep they have, its all 1970s stuff, apprentices today are a bit more wiser.

[Rooty 10]

At work they asked someone to go downstairs and fetch a chocolate teapot, he got downstairs then realised he'd been had. I got asked to see if ***** had any bellendsleydale cheese....i weren't falling for that one!

[Harleykim 10]

Tell them the boss had a sex change, and is a little sensitive about being called he/she..so they must only call the boss "it"

[Harleykim 10]

Put some water in your hands, walk up behind them, and pertend to sneeze, while throwing the water at them, then walk away muttering to yourself and holding your hands over your mouth and nose

[sheff-lad 10]

Not really apprentices but here's some we've played on the work-experience kids or the xmas temps in a department store:

 

Bags for a dyson hoover :~ (the poor lad actually spent 20 minutes looking for these till the manager found him and asked what he was doing, told him and the manager helped him look too for about 10 mins until he realised it was a wind up !!)

 

ink cartridges for the till receipt printer :~ doesn't use ink, it's thermolytic paper !

 

sky hooks :~ for putting up hanging banners

 

new beeps for the security gates !

 

cruel, but if anyone has any more for use in retail i'd love to try some!!

[artisan 10]

An apprentice electrician (on his first day) was sent to me to ask for a 'short circuit'. I told him to go back and tell thwm we had non, he was back about half and hour later saying 'if you have non of those can you get us some earth faults'? I took him to one side and explained the error of his ways.

He learned his lesson too well hower. Some weeks later he was working in my dept. and one of the lads sent him for a rubber mallet. The young lad thinking he was being had on again refused to go.

He got his backside kicked from here to breakfast time

[Herbert 10]

spots for the spot welder, sparks for the bench grinder and engineers blue on the rim of the brazing goggles:hihi:

[dynamicdebz 10]

sky hooks :~ for putting up hanging banners

 

 

These are actually a true object!

They are hooks that suspend from ceilings that hold info, usually directions on them.

[depoix 11]

Not really apprentices but here's some we've played on the work-experience kids or the xmas temps in a department store:

 

Bags for a dyson hoover :~ (the poor lad actually spent 20 minutes looking for these till the manager found him and asked what he was doing, told him and the manager helped him look too for about 10 mins until he realised it was a wind up !!)

 

ink cartridges for the till receipt printer :~ doesn't use ink, it's thermolytic paper !

 

sky hooks :~ for putting up hanging banners

 

new beeps for the security gates !

 

cruel, but if anyone has any more for use in retail i'd love to try some!!

a little similar,i told a bunch of building trades apprentices they were due for their vaccinations,they asked what vaccinations,i said they should have read the small print,they were going to be working on sites with old rusty nails broken glass etc etc,i knew the young lady who had just arrived,parked her car and gone into the managers office,she was the wages clerk,i had a word with the boss and her and both agreed it would be a laugh to start the weekend, well i got them all lined up,there left sleeve rolled up ready,as usual there was the mouthy one,big,stupid and all macho,well as each lad walked into the office he was told to scream as loud as he could,draw his wages and leave by the other door,this was great as the screams got louder,the big mouth worked his way to the back,at last it was his turn,i walked him into the office, he babbledsomething about not wanting it in his arm, turned round and dropped his trousers,without flinching sue,the lady with the wages " posted" his envelope straight in his crack, he shot of calling everyone f xxxin wanxers,but he was very quiet the following monday at work,another was when a mate of mine took his apprentice drinking after he passed his exams,the work team all turned up and they did west street and a club or two, the lad passed out so the elder lads took him home and put him to bed,but not before they put a condom up his bum with the help of a pencil, this along with a few love bites on his neck,monday morning was all banter about the night out,they asked him how he got home as they left him with the two other blokes he had been talking to in the club,he never mentioned anything,but my mate says he kept asking what other two blokes ?

[Rooty 10]

when a mate of mine took his apprentice drinking after he passed his exams,the work team all turned up and they did west street and a club or two, the lad passed out so the elder lads took him home and put him to bed,but not before they put a condom up his bum with the help of a pencil, this along with a few love bites on his neck,monday morning was all banter about the night out,they asked him how he got home as they left him with the two other blokes he had been talking to in the club,he never mentioned anything,but my mate says he kept asking what other two blokes ?

 

Lol, gosh, thats evil, funny though

[peterw 10]

When I first started in newspapers I was asked to contact a newly-arrived R.C. Priest and find out all about him for a news item. I asked what sort of questions I should ask, and he told me to first ask was he married and did he have any children.

 

The second one came when I was told it was obligatory to join the Union. In newspapers, the branch is called a Chapel and I was warned in advance that as part of the initiation ceremony at its next meeting, which was to take place in two weeks, I would have to learn off by heart an entire chapter of the Bible, and recite it in front of the members.

 

It was a struggle, but I learned it and recited it to about 50 staff who had a hell of a job to stop themselves bursting into laughter. Can’t remember which chapter it was, but I recall something about “Many Mansions”.

[Longcol 604]

A popular one in Stocksbridge Works was to send the new lad to the stores for a "long stand".

 

After they'd stood there for an hour or so the brighter ones twigged.