Help with ditty.. Your dinner is in the oven dear

[Arthur Ritus 30]

My old pa whenever anybody was late for dinner would rattle of one of his little ditties but i cannot remember it. Much searching on net hasn't turned up anything. went something like this:

 

Your dinner is in the oven dear da da da da da da,

your da da da da da da da a da da da a new, ( “pipe” in there somewhere)

Your slippers are by the fire side but where the hell are you.

 

Its really bugging me, i must have heard it so many times i cannot believe i cannot remember it. Perhaps somebody out there can put me out of my misery, he wouldn't have invented it himself so maybe someone else knoews the verse.

[Yorkshire 53 10]

Can I have a go ?

 

Your dinner's in the oven dear, it's keeping nice and hot,

Your pipe is on the mantelpiece, by your tobacco pot.

Your Green Un's waiting for you dear, your Littlewood's to do,

Your slippers are by the fireside, But where the hell are you ?

 

Can't you find the original on some site ? It may appear.

[Alcoblog 10]

My old pa whenever anybody was late for dinner would rattle of one of his little ditties but i cannot remember it. Much searching on net hasn't turned up anything. went something like this:

 

Your dinner is in the oven dear da da da da da da,

your da da da da da da da a da da da a new, ( “pipe” in there somewhere)

Your slippers are by the fire side but where the hell are you.

 

Its really bugging me, i must have heard it so many times i cannot believe i cannot remember it. Perhaps somebody out there can put me out of my misery, he wouldn't have invented it himself so maybe someone else knoews the verse.

 

Is it,

 

Your dinner is in the oven dear,

as well as your stamp collection.

 

Your pipe's gone through the waste macerator dear,

'you beginning to make the connection?

 

Your clothes are in the bin my dear,

Your car's tyres all been slashed

 

Your little black book of phone numbers, dear

set alight and trashed.

 

The carving knife's gone missing dear

no fingerprints to find

 

I've emptied all your bank account my dear

before it slips my mind

 

No DNA for forensics dear

the hazmat suit's been torched

 

A lot of heat it took my dear

the carpet's all been scorched

 

Your slippers are by the fireside my dear

but where the hell are you?

 

Are you out with that floozie again my dear

or are you up the flue?

 

[Yorkshire 53 10]

Can't beat that, brill ! I've done it as if it's a woman talking, it's the 'slippers by the fire' that threw me.

[maggi 10]

Ha! There's a little plaque with this on in my parents' house.

 

Your slippers are by the fire, dear

Your pipe and a book that's new

Your dinner is in the oven

But where the hell are you?

 

Happy days, eh?!

[Arthur Ritus 30]

well done alcoblog that's brilliaint.

 

Maggi that will be the one, many thanks its been nagging me for years. I'm not sure if he said it differently or more likely my memory mixing it up - it was a long time ago.

Again many thanks.

[Yorkshire 53 10]

Do you know anymore Maggi, preferably Sheffield centred ?

 

There was one about Banner's store in Attercliffe, but I forget most of it ;-

 

Get thissen ter Banner's dad,

Before the sale is o'er.

They've reduced their saws and spanners dad,

By the lift on the second floor.

 

There's about 4 verses, but I forget the rest.