Toilet wall humour.

[poison_pen 10]

This is bringing out the worst in us ! Bert has won the pools and is giving a barbeque in the garden of his new house to all his old friends after showing them his gold-plated indoor loo, one of whom says, " Hey Bert, haven't you done well, you used to eat in't house and s . . . outside !"

 

LOLOL remember if your out side peeing sing so they know your in here I remember the IZAL toilet paper too ouchie didn't aff hurt:gag:

 

---------- Post added 10-10-2013 at 14:58 ----------

 

My friend used to have this in her bathroom:

 

The organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was

In charge. Each organ took a turn to speak up:

 

Brain......... I should be in charge because I run all body functions.

Blood........ I should be in charge because I circulate oxygen for the brain.

Stomach... I should be in charge because I process food to the brain.

Legs......... I should be in charge because I take the brain where it Wants to go.

Eyes......... I should be in charge because I let the brain see where it's going.

Asshole.....I should be in charge because I get rid of your waste.

 

All the other parts laughed so hard and this made the asshole very mad.

To prove his point, the asshole immediately slammed tightly closed and

Stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.

 

Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief

Day 2 - Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly

Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable

Day 4 - Eyes became watery and vision became blurred

Day 5 - Blood became toxic and poisoned the body

Day 6 -The other organs agreed to let the asshole be in charge.

 

*MORAL OF THE STORY: NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW IMPORTANT YOU THINK

YOU ARE, YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE THAT IS IN

CHARGE.*

[Manxdeedah 10]

Sportsman on Cambridge Street had tiled graffiti int bogs.

 

"If Typhoo put the tea in Britain,who put the c**t in Scunthorpe".

[poison_pen 10]

Sportsman on Cambridge Street had tiled graffiti int bogs.

 

"If Typhoo put the tea in Britain,who put the c**t in Scunthorpe".

 

omgeee I LOVE IT

[jwilliamson 10]

Rotherham art college toilet in the 1960s. 'To be is to do' - Socrates. 'To do is to be' -Satre. 'To do be do be do' - Sinatra. Rotherham was well known for its intellectual sense of humour!

[Shogun 10]

Who was Kilroy anyway...

[Steptoad 12]

Who was Kilroy anyway...

 

From memory, I believe he was the man who checked the welding on steel panels in a shipyard during either the first or second world war. He wrote "Kilroy was here" on the panels he checked.

 

I'm sure somebody will correct my "facts", if they're wrong.

[Manxdeedah 10]

"Exit signs are ont way out" was another.

[daffodil123 10]

hark hark the bombs are roaring

must be the peas i ate this morning

quick quick the lavatory door

too late too late it's on the floor.

[flyer 10]

From memory, I believe he was the man who checked the welding on steel panels in a shipyard during either the first or second world war. He wrote "Kilroy was here" on the panels he checked.

 

I'm sure somebody will correct my "facts", if they're wrong.

 

It would to be the first world war they was all over the place by the second,Kilroy sounds a little amercan always thought it was a yank ???:confused:

[Jim Hardie 527]

My friend used to have this in her bathroom:

 

The organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was

In charge. Each organ took a turn to speak up:

 

Brain......... I should be in charge because I run all body functions.

Blood........ I should be in charge because I circulate oxygen for the brain.

Stomach... I should be in charge because I process food to the brain.

Legs......... I should be in charge because I take the brain where it Wants to go.

Eyes......... I should be in charge because I let the brain see where it's going.

Asshole.....I should be in charge because I get rid of your waste.

 

All the other parts laughed so hard and this made the asshole very mad.

To prove his point, the asshole immediately slammed tightly closed and

Stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.

 

Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief

Day 2 - Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly

Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable

Day 4 - Eyes became watery and vision became blurred

Day 5 - Blood became toxic and poisoned the body

Day 6 -The other organs agreed to let the asshole be in charge.

 

*MORAL OF THE STORY: NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW IMPORTANT YOU THINK

YOU ARE, YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE THAT IS IN

CHARGE.*

 

You have a fantastic memory. Sure it was your friend's bathroom?

[Rampent 10]

hark hark the bombs are roaring

must be the peas i ate this morning

quick quick the lavatory door

too late too late it's on the floor.

 

 

Poetry :D

[rossyrooney 12]

The painters work is all in vain

The ****house poet strikes again

 

---------- Post added 12-10-2013 at 18:53 ----------

 

To the sh*thouse poet

When he should die,

There should be erected,

Broad and high,

For his cunning

And for his wit,

A solid monument made of sh*t.

 

---------- Post added 12-10-2013 at 18:55 ----------

 

Here I sit in dull repose,

That fart you left still burns my nose.