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Tell us a Limerick (Part 9)

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The weather can't make up its mind

Whether to be nasty or kind

If it's gonna be nice

Make it more than a trice

That Paul Hudson must be half blind.

 

:hihi::hihi::hihi::hihi::hihi:

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I had two young ladies visit me

Bringing flowers and cream cakes for tea

We had a good natter

About this and that matter

Then scoffed all the cake ravenously.

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Rossy's been 'entertaining' again

He's the most insatiable of men

Every day, around three

Troops of nymphets come for 'tea'

And a Swiss roll ... well good for them!

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A swiss roll just about sums it up

I'm as virile as my neutered pup:rolleyes:

Some tea and a bun

Is my limit for fun

I'd just die if a lady said yup.:gag:

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Today I've been doing some weeding

And the plants feeding

Blackberry I've cut

Garden tidier, but

It scratched me and now I am bleeding.

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I'll bet it just looks a treat

And you're chuffed at completing your feat

Now just look around

At your pristine ground

Then open a bottle and pull up a seat.:thumbsup:

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Well it's nice to called young lady and nymphet:love:

So I'd to add my thanks and have a little bet:D

That the ones who named me that:D

Must be as blind as proverbial bat:suspect:

Or they're after money, Frayed I've got none pet:hihi::hihi:

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Today I've been doing some weeding

And the plants feeding

Blackberry I've cut

Garden tidier, but

It scratched me and now I am bleeding.

 

Sounds like a major disaster

And time to stick on a plaster

Blackberry thorns

Are devils with horns

And so's my cotoneaster

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Well look what the cat dragged in:D

Where in the devil have you been:suspect:

We're glad you're back:D

And ant got the sack:gag:

I'll have a tonic laced with gin:hihi::hihi:

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Rj's got the gardening bug

He's growing his taters in mud

His beans are a sprouting

His lips are a pouting

already for a tart rhubarb pudd

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It's gardening bugs that I've got

The sort that make your plants rot

There's flies green and black

Snails and slugs I don't lack

And something I think is blackspot

 

I can grow dandelions and clover

And nettles that pop up all over

The goose grass and weeds

Need no special feeds

To burst forth like some super nova.

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Just tell me abaht it owd chum

Them weeds are a pain in the bum

On the plus side, it's true,

Wild strawbs growing too

Which, with cream, are quite nice in the tum.

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