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Desperately seeking help, death of a relative

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I can't add to this other than my sincere sympathy.

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im so sorry for your loss. When my dad passed away 3 years ago we used Simpsons on city road, we applied for the a funeral grant and were succesfull but we ended up being a bit short also but Simpsons let us pay it off in instalments over a few months following the funeral. Im not sure if all of them can or will be willing to do this but it might be worth asking.

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honeyb35 you have my sympathy at this awful time.

 

I realise your family have already arranged the funeral so there is probably not much point suggesting alternative funeral directors now. You mentioned in the OP that your Brother in law's mum was legally his next of kin, but was ill so it was difficult for her to deal with things. If she signs a letter the authorities etc should deal with your partner or another family member on her behalf.

 

Best wishes to you and your family.

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I'm not involved in the planning of the funeral as such, his family are and have gone with JH now so nothing I can really suggest :( they are adamant it has to be a burial though, not a cremation.

The initial cost of the funeral was £3500, hubby has got it down to about £2500, but thats a graveside service rather than a church (hope it doesn't rain, BIL better send reasonable weather for us!) and no cars.

It has made me think about things like this - we really don't know when the end is for us. I must ensure my wishes are in place as a just in case - I don't want my family going through this if it happens to me. Simple coffin / cremation for me (and a decent wake!)

 

I can't offer any useful advice I'm afraid, but it's made me think about this too - I had no idea funeral costs were so expensive!

I'd go with Plain Talker on this one - the simplest service possible, after all, the deceased doesn't know. The funeral is for the people left behind. Simple service, huge party/wake afterwards to remember in style!

 

My godmother passed away a few years ago, at the age of 59. They had a cremation, and hired a youth hostel type place that everyone went back to for the wake. We had music, dancing, food, drink - everything we used to do with her when she was well. The "proper send off" doesn't have to be arranged by a funeral director that will bankrupt the family!

I guess the circumstances make a difference though - she was terminally ill for nearly two years, so by the time she actually died it was almost a relief - everyone had done their grieving as her personality slipped away while she lived :(

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sorry for ur lost it will be hus mum next of kin but if shes claiming benefits than she can apply fir the funeral payment u fill in the form for her and get her to sign it and put u filled it in on her behalf as there will be a section to say did someone fill this form on ur behalf and think with the funeral directors u can come to an arrangement where u can pay ut off each week as explain ur financial situation hope u sort it out xx

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It was less than 6 months ago, she had cancer and it spread to her brain so she knew she was dying for over a year, she told us not to waste money on the funeral before she died.

 

It was a basic service but still a nice one.*

 

Also there was Morts mums funeral, which I went to.

 

-- EDIT --

 

*well as nice as funerals ever are I suppose

 

My bf dad has just died and he has had to apply for a berievment grant as he is on benefits. He has gust gone to the funeral directors and been told that the absolute barest bones of a funeral(basically picking up from hosp,putting him in the cheapest box,and delivering him to the crematorium will cost £1800, thats with a £100 knocked off and then he says the grant will only be £1400Leaving me to find £400 which he requires as a deposit before he will touch him.How can this be ! I will see the amount of the grant so i doubt he is lying. Also when he went to the council to tell them of his death and end his tennancy he ended up sighning a form saying he had a wk to remove ALL OF MY OWN HOUSEHOLD EFFECTS and agree that anything left behind will be disposed of without notice to me and.Now a friend of mine who has been in a simular situation says if i dont get everything of my dads out of the house,they will charge me £400 +

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