Mobile phones and kids

[pallu 10]

My 11 yr old is driving me nuts. Some of his friends have just been given or already have mobile phones. One even has a blackberry! He says he needs it to keep in touch with his mates. He already has an i touch and access to computers and our mobiles and a landline. How will his "own" phone make a difference? I know it is about being grown up and like his peers and I do know that in the next 6-12 months he will need his own phone so he can keep in touch with us. But I was planning to recycle one of our old ones with a pay as you go thing. I feel like an ogre and some of my reluctance I know is about control ie me controlling him. Am I being difficult? Should I give in? He is a good kid. I know that this is the beginning of the end and just the first in lots of "discussions" about what he can and can't do.

Any top tips gratefully accepted.

[Mummytwo 10]

An 11 year old does not need a phone. You are being sensible unlike his friends parents.

[pottedplant 10]

Hold out on anything like personal mobiles, face book, twitter etc for as long as you can. At 11 kids need to be running about not sat texting and writing messages about themselves.

 

As for your statement "will need one in next 6-12 months to keep in touch with us" I would just ask if you had one at that age? I didn't.

[Isabelle 10]

Definetly get a pay as you go one, don't get a contract and maybe you could make him 'earn' phone credit by being good and doing chores, help him learn the value of working to get things he wants.

An expensive phone would be more likely to be stolen, and you would both be gutted if he lost or broke it, maybe you could compromise?

[CorkerSWFC 10]

I bought my lad a smartphone for his birthday from T-Mobile, it was a phone what they had played with to show how easy it was to copy what I-phone are robbing people blind with...

£30 quid and it's absolutely brilliant...

[HeadingNorth 11]

Hold out on anything like personal mobiles, face book, twitter etc for as long as you can. At 11 kids need to be running about not sat texting and writing messages about themselves.

 

As for your statement "will need one in next 6-12 months to keep in touch with us" I would just ask if you had one at that age? I didn't.

 

I didn't have one until I was older than most parents. That's a bad reason for not letting anyone else have one until they reach the same age.

 

 

There are two questions to be asked; does he need a mobile phone? No. Does he need to not have a mobile phone? Again, no. It's down to parental judgment.

[janie48 98]

My 11 yr old is driving me nuts. Some of his friends have just been given or already have mobile phones. One even has a blackberry! He says he needs it to keep in touch with his mates. He already has an i touch and access to computers and our mobiles and a landline. How will his "own" phone make a difference? I know it is about being grown up and like his peers and I do know that in the next 6-12 months he will need his own phone so he can keep in touch with us. But I was planning to recycle one of our old ones with a pay as you go thing. I feel like an ogre and some of my reluctance I know is about control ie me controlling him. Am I being difficult? Should I give in? He is a good kid. I know that this is the beginning of the end and just the first in lots of "discussions" about what he can and can't do.

Any top tips gratefully accepted.

 

I think you are being very sensible by not giving in.Some parents seem to indulge their children with all the latest toys and gadgets,they may be doing that because they are not able to give them the most precious gift (time) don't feel too pressured,your son will appreciate your wise choices later.

[Bypassblade 10]

Sorry but the child is 11, I know lots of kids have them, but I think that's pathetic, they are okay when say 15 as go out more & can keep in touch. I remember many years ago my eldest daughter asked to go somewhere she was 12, I said no not old enough, she said all my mates parents are letting them go.

 

I said do they call their parents Pete & Tracy, she said no dad, I said well when they do; you can go.

[discodown 11]

My 8 year old has said he wants a phone. I asked him who he was going to call. He didn't know. Therefore he doesn't need one.

[Oldtrout 10]

What about letting him have his own PAYG, but restrict his use to just one hour per night. Insist that you keep it safe, in a drawer or such, and he must not use it without permission. If he shows he can be sensible and stick within the rules, then maybe increase his usage.

[Joanl 12]

I was watching someone on the news the other night when O2 were having their problems. This poor mum was distraught, she couldn't get in touch with her family, she didn't know if they were ok or even if her husband was ok How on earth anyone else ever managed before mobiles I daren't even begin to imagine.I found that pretty scary in itself, let alone kids not being able to use their mobiles whenever THEY want to let alone whilst at school etc....

Edited July 14, 2012 by Joanl
finish it off

[Oldtrout 10]

I was watching someone on the news the other night when O2 were having their problems. This poor mum was distraught, she couldn't get in touch with her family, she didn't know if they were ok or even if her husband was ok How on earth anyone else ever managed before mobiles I daren't even begin to imagine.I found that pretty scary in itself, let alone kids not being able to use their mobiles whenever THEY want to let alone whilst at school etc....

 

I think it's like a lot of things, once you get used to something, it's hard to imagine how you managed before. Bit like learning to drive.. once you can drive, you wonder how you ever got about before.

 

However, it does sound like that mum being distraught was over-reacting slightly. You don't need to know where and how everyone is every minute of the day.

 

Once kids have unlimited access to a mobile phone, that's it ... for life! The same for adults.