cutie23 Posted December 13, 2011 Posted December 13, 2011 Hi, I know someone who is seeing a married man and she knew this from the day she got involved. The man she is involved with said he would never leave his wife as he loves her just sex their life is flat. The person I know is happy with this arrangement she only sees him on the odd occasion i.e. once a yr now but before a couple of years it would have been more frequent. Far as she is concerned she is not cheating as she is single and it is the guy. However I feel that it is wrong there is a question of morality here. How do I make a point to her that you are wrong in what you are doing as you know he is married as opposed to you didn’t know. What are people’s opinions on this matter?
HeadingNorth Posted December 13, 2011 Posted December 13, 2011 In order to cheat on someone, doesn't there have to be some form of promise to that someone?
Halibut Posted December 13, 2011 Posted December 13, 2011 What your friend is doing is wrong and has the capacity to wreak havoc on other people's lives.
Rich Posted December 13, 2011 Posted December 13, 2011 In order to cheat on someone, doesn't there have to be some form of promise to that someone? Yeah, if the bloke's married, he'll have made that promise in his Wedding vows to the wife.
andygardener Posted December 13, 2011 Posted December 13, 2011 Yeah, if the bloke's married, he'll have made that promise in his Wedding vows to the wife. I may have misread the op's post but my understanding was that chap playing away with her mate didn't have a sex life with his wife. Wedding vows do include the old have and to hold bit so they work both ways. Clearly anyone in a healthy sexual relationship with their wife should not be cheating on them, but if the case is that there is no sexual relationship between the man and wife can we make the same judgement?
Halibut Posted December 13, 2011 Posted December 13, 2011 I may have misread the op's post but my understanding was that chap playing away with her mate didn't have a sex life with his wife. Wedding vows do include the old have and to hold bit so they work both ways. Clearly anyone in a healthy sexual relationship with their wife should not be cheating on them, but if the case is that there is no sexual relationship between the man and wife can we make the same judgement? I think so, yes. Unless the vows you took said 'I vow to go and screw someone else behind your back as soon as you stop putting out for me'. Which it probably didn't.
hugh jarse Posted December 13, 2011 Posted December 13, 2011 the word used was "cheating".....what part of cheating is morally right? we use this word when someone is doing something wrong
andygardener Posted December 13, 2011 Posted December 13, 2011 I think so, yes. Unless the vows you took said 'I vow to go and screw someone else behind your back as soon as you stop putting out for me'. Which it probably didn't. I understand what you mean but surely it's the behind the back (ie not being honest about what he's doing) that is the moral issue not the screwing if there is no sexual relationship to cheat on?
cressida Posted December 13, 2011 Posted December 13, 2011 I think so, yes. Unless the vows you took said 'I vow to go and screw someone else behind your back as soon as you stop putting out for me'. Which it probably didn't. I agree, and if she only does it once a year it hardly seems worth it
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