Stressed new mum - needing advice

[lubylou12 10]

im glad i didnt advise any of my friends to wean early based on what i was told now.

 

iv got eczema, asthma and a lot of allergies and i was exclusivly bf till i was 6 month so it works both ways. my son has eczema and a few allergies 1 which started before i started weaning and the other when he was 7 month. because of this you can understand me being a bit sceptical on what mw and hv tell you really

 

exactly, my friend said the same to me when i was feeling guilty about giving up breastfeeding, she told me, her first child was breastfed until 6 months and gets everything going around, whereas her other child was not breastfed and was weaned at 13 weeks is never ill, work that one out lol

 

i think some health visitors dont even have kids of thier own, i know most i have had havent and just go by the book book book:rolleyes:

 

and then my last health visitor was amazing, shes got grown up kids, she understands more, listens more and mostly gives her advice but also insists that mums know thier babys better then anyone else and to trust your instincts

[CHEZZFAYE 10]

exactly, my friend said the same to me when i was feeling guilty about giving up breastfeeding, she told me, her first child was breastfed until 6 months and gets everything going around, whereas her other child was not breastfed and was weaned at 13 weeks is never ill, work that one out lol

 

i think some health visitors dont even have kids of thier own, i know most i have had havent and just go by the book book book:rolleyes:

 

and then my last health visitor was amazing, shes got grown up kids, she understands more, listens more and mostly gives her advice but also insists that mums know thier babys better then anyone else and to trust your instincts

sounds like my mw lol. my last 1 didnt have kids n was usless i went in2 labour knowing nothing with my birth plan not even filled in, my hv has been pretty much the same when i told her my son could talk at bout 8 month she put babling in my book, so the words mum dad n baby are babling, she got a right shock the month after when the threw a book under her table looked straight at her n said gone ( felt like saying told you so).

 

my new mw has got 4 kids when i told her how old my son was at weaning she told me she did the exact same with her 2 youngest and my birth plan is getting filled in next wk. shes also said shes not gonna bug me about bf as i had problems last time and i obviously know what im doing as i have a very healthy happy son. my new hv has kids and i had a few worries bout my son shes been to my house ( old 1 never has in nearly 13 month) put me in touch with a nurserey nurse to encourage play and sorted all my worries out, and said my son is developing well so theres no problems at the moment.

[andre6cam 10]

hi i m a mum of 4 an young nan of 2.every time you have a child they give you different advice and go back to what they say don t do. i will say you sound a good mum 4 1 so if you beating yourself up don t.little bit of solids like baby rice could be the answer. its just trial and error.what about croupe?have you had him to drs? not telling you how to suck eggs just feel for you. when you go to him don t pick him up just stroke his brow and hopefully he ll settle.you could try this. try and not show stress to him.i know easier said than done .i hope he settles for you m8 good luck

[lubylou12 10]

sounds like my mw lol. my last 1 didnt have kids n was usless i went in2 labour knowing nothing with my birth plan not even filled in, my hv has been pretty much the same when i told her my son could talk at bout 8 month she put babling in my book, so the words mum dad n baby are babling, she got a right shock the month after when the threw a book under her table looked straight at her n said gone ( felt like saying told you so).

 

my new mw has got 4 kids when i told her how old my son was at weaning she told me she did the exact same with her 2 youngest and my birth plan is getting filled in next wk. shes also said shes not gonna bug me about bf as i had problems last time and i obviously know what im doing as i have a very healthy happy son. my new hv has kids and i had a few worries bout my son shes been to my house ( old 1 never has in nearly 13 month) put me in touch with a nurserey nurse to encourage play and sorted all my worries out, and said my son is developing well so theres no problems at the moment.

 

awww bless that made me laugh, wish i could have seen her face, i do think the ones who havent had kids themselve just go by the old fashioned books, much better with the ones who are mothers themselves.

 

ive been looking in my red baby books, and my litttle girl was crawling and saying mamma, dadda, nanna and pop at 8 months and was walking at 11 months, unbelieveble i know but true, then my son was way behind her, didnt crawl until 11 months and walked at 13 months, every child is different and has different needs, that why i say do what you think is best for them at that time and ignore all the haters and do gooders, you know your child like no one else:D:D

[lubylou12 10]

hi i m a mum of 4 an young nan of 2.every time you have a child they give you different advice and go back to what they say don t do. i will say you sound a good mum 4 1 so if you beating yourself up don t.little bit of solids like baby rice could be the answer. its just trial and error.what about croupe?have you had him to drs? not telling you how to suck eggs just feel for you. when you go to him don t pick him up just stroke his brow and hopefully he ll settle.you could try this. try and not show stress to him.i know easier said than done .i hope he settles for you m8 good luck

 

 

thanks you so much,i try my best, but have been pushed to the limit the last few weeks, and its hard but i survive lol, and yes agreed the advice changes more then thier knickers

 

what are the signs of croup?

 

yes hes been to the docs 3 times, first two times they say nothings wrong, 3rd time the said colic, and gave me infacol, but i really dont think its this as ive been through it before and its nothing compared to that:gag:

 

and yes i do also do that stroking his brow, he loves it bless, this is how i get him to sleep before bedtime, then he out like a light, just wish i had the time to do it all the time like he wants but just dont, i feel for my older kids as im always trying to stop him crying and they have to wait, but after all the advice here, im sure ill be ok, hes still my gorgeous little boy and we will get through it, yesterday was a brill day to be honest, i left the housework and just sat talking to him, go some lovely gummy smiles and coos, i love these days, but the house looks like a bombs hit it today, so time to clean lol

[Corbyn 10]

im glad i didnt advise any of my friends to wean early based on what i was told now.

 

iv got eczema, asthma and a lot of allergies and i was exclusivly bf till i was 6 month so it works both ways. my son has eczema and a few allergies 1 which started before i started weaning and the other when he was 7 month. because of this you can understand me being a bit sceptical on what mw and hv tell you really

 

My son has severe eczema even though I breastfed him and didn't wean him until 6 months. Doing all the "right" things won't always stop them from getting it, just reduces the chances. I'll do it all again with my daughter as I'll do anything to try to reduce the chances of her getting eczema. My poor little boy has an awful time with it and the time consuming cream regimes are hard on all of us.

 

Interestingly though, my son had food allergy testing done recently for milk, cheese, eggs, soya, wheat and tomatoes and wasn't allergic to any of them. I'm thankful in a way that I did breastfeed him etc as if he had had these allergies too I can't even imagine how bad his skin would be.

 

I understand what you mean about being sceptical but HV should tell you the ideal things to do e.g. breastfeed etc then you have the information and can still make your own choice.

[Corbyn 10]

lubylou12, it sounds to me like your son just wants your attention all the time. My daughter is the same. I think you only have 2 choices which are give in and hold him/interact with him all the time or start to leave him sometimes. I went with option one and I'm regretting it a bit now! I'm trying at the moment to get her into some kind of sleeping routine but it's not working. She fell asleep whilst feeding and I transferred her to the cot. The minute she was put in she woke up. 10-15 minutes later she's still crying

I'll give her another 15 mins to go to sleep and then I'll have to give up. She's a pain but I love her

 

EDIT OMG she's asleep!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't believe it!

Edited March 26, 2010 by Corbyn

[lubylou12 10]

lubylou12, it sounds to me like your son just wants your attention all the time. My daughter is the same. I think you only have 2 choices which are give in and hold him/interact with him all the time or start to leave him sometimes. I went with option one and I'm regretting it a bit now! I'm trying at the moment to get her into some kind of sleeping routine but it's not working. She fell asleep whilst feeding and I transferred her to the cot. The minute she was put in she woke up. 10-15 minutes later she's still crying

I'll give her another 15 mins to go to sleep and then I'll have to give up. She's a pain but I love her

 

yes hun he deffo wants that for sure, i cant possibly hold him all the time as i have too much to do, my house would not survive:D i have to leave him when im cooking etc, its just hard as he gets himself so upset, fast asleep now in his pram still from the school run and its bliss:hihi:

 

aww i feel for you hun i do, i know now id llove to put him in his moses baskets now and try to have a nap myself as was up late lastnight and shatterd, but scared if i lift him out of prams the silence will be broken lol

[Corbyn 10]

I would dearly love a rest but even if dd is asleep ds, who is nearly 3, would certainly not allow it! Just trying to mute him now so he doesn't wake her up! Forgot to add incase you don't see my edit on the other post - she's gone to sleep ... in her cot!!!!!!!!!!

[lubylou12 10]

I would dearly love a rest but even if dd is asleep ds, who is nearly 3, would certainly not allow it! Just trying to mute him now so he doesn't wake her up! Forgot to add incase you don't see my edit on the other post - she's gone to sleep ... in her cot!!!!!!!!!!

 

awwww good one hun, mine other way round, just woke up,

 

ive yet to put him in a cot, hope he takes to it ok

[CHEZZFAYE 10]

My son has severe eczema even though I breastfed him and didn't wean him until 6 months. Doing all the "right" things won't always stop them from getting it, just reduces the chances. I'll do it all again with my daughter as I'll do anything to try to reduce the chances of her getting eczema. My poor little boy has an awful time with it and the time consuming cream regimes are hard on all of us.

 

Interestingly though, my son had food allergy testing done recently for milk, cheese, eggs, soya, wheat and tomatoes and wasn't allergic to any of them. I'm thankful in a way that I did breastfeed him etc as if he had had these allergies too I can't even imagine how bad his skin would be.

 

I understand what you mean about being sceptical but HV should tell you the ideal things to do e.g. breastfeed etc then you have the information and can still make your own choice.

that the point tho my mw and hv i had for my son were both usless so gave me no good advice and constantly contradicted each other.

 

as for the brestfeeding i got it pushed down my throat at every visit, even though i planned 2 if possible. when my son couldnt latch on and i asked for a bottle after 5 hrs ( still on labour ward) all i got was your chart says your bf and it took me nearly another hr to give me a bottle. it turned out some fool had put my son had allready fed. so i probably will ignore most things they tell me again because when it comes to my kids i no best

[baby tiger67 10]

after having 3 kids myself and going through what your going through now, it could be one of two things, colic or they need more milk, i tried the more milk first and it didnt work, so a trip to the docs it was and bingo, it was severe colic, i was advised to give 4 oz of cooled boiled water with a teaspoon of brown sugar in it. plus colic drops, wow, it worked a treat.