Thief in your family, what would you do?

[my eyes only 10]

We have a giant coke bottle money box in our lounge. everyone in the house puts their change in it. Pennys, fives, tens, etc. No big coins.

 

The bottle was a 1/4 of the way from being full, when we noticed it was going down.

 

I know it's not my son as he has his own money and also puts change in the bottle.

 

My brother was always the "money thief" when we were all growing up.

 

He has been out of work for many years and never has any cash. We always take him for a couple of pints at the weekend and i got into the habit of giving him a few quid to buy some booze for himself.

 

A few weeks back when we first noticed it going down, i put a 5p coin under the bottle on the floor and dropped a 50p inside the bottle which landed more or less in the middle.

 

My brother had been up my place yesterday as i left him a home made pie. ( Thats another thing. I usually make extra so he can take one home).

 

We went to put some money in the bottle last night, and again it has gone down. I noticed i couldn't see the 50p and the 5p had gone, so i know the bottle has been tipped up.

 

I want him to know that i know that it's him, but it is difficult to say as he will throw a strop, deny it, then ignore me and my family for ever.

 

What would you do?

 

I'm gutted, as i feel we do a lot for him.

 

i would write on a piece of paper - to whom this might concern, keep your thieving mitts off my money or you might have a shock one day! I know how much is in here and where every penny is on the top!!!

 

I would do that so if he does go in to take some money he will know you know some money has been going missing. but i doubt he will menstion it to you if it his him. Hope this helps only an idea.

[Y.D.R.M.D.Y? 10]

Put a note under the bottle saying "I know it's you <insert name here>!!"... the only way he'll know it's there will be if he tips the bottle up... and he can't get annoyed cos he shouldn't have seen it, so he won't say anything!

 

I love this one!

 

You are so right, what can he say?

[poppypoppy 10]

I sympathise with you..cos we have our son stealing from us...I cant leave my bag with my purse in downstairs if I nip upstairs or go out to the bin....cos hes been in it and took my money...we have confronted him about it..cos we too have set traps for him..thats how we know its him whats doin it...but he denies its him...even tho theres only been him in the house when we have set the trap...I've also done the note thingy...saying keep yr thievin hands off my money..and another little note saying how much there is...my husband has also had his briefcase broken into by him...he got a screwdriver on the locks so he cud get to the money we put in there...we thought it was a safe place to put money...he got into it and stole it...we've now put a huge lock on the wardrobe and everything of value..and I mean everything..goes in there...and so far...touch wood..he hasnt tried that lock...but I know how you feel when someone you love dearly steals from you...I dont know what to advise you to do..cos we tried everything....

[Big Boy 10]

I sympathise with you..cos we have our son stealing from us...I cant leave my bag with my purse in downstairs if I nip upstairs or go out to the bin....cos hes been in it and took my money...we have confronted him about it..cos we too have set traps for him..thats how we know its him whats doin it...but he denies its him...even tho theres only been him in the house when we have set the trap...I've also done the note thingy...saying keep yr thievin hands off my money..and another little note saying how much there is...my husband has also had his briefcase broken into by him...he got a screwdriver on the locks so he cud get to the money we put in there...we thought it was a safe place to put money...he got into it and stole it...we've now put a huge lock on the wardrobe and everything of value..and I mean everything..goes in there...and so far...touch wood..he hasnt tried that lock...but I know how you feel when someone you love dearly steals from you...I dont know what to advise you to do..cos we tried everything....

 

I think you should contact the police.

[poppypoppy 10]

I think you should contact the police.

 

Yep threatened him with that too...it didnt bother him...the thing thats stopping me is hes my son....I know what yr going to say...and I know I'm not doing him any favours here...but its extremely hard to report your own child to the police isnt it...well it is for me...see I'm too soft with him...no excuse I know...

[Big Boy 10]

Yep threatened him with that too...it didnt bother him...the thing thats stopping me is hes my son....I know what yr going to say...and I know I'm not doing him any favours here...but its extremely hard to report your own child to the police isnt it...well it is for me...see I'm too soft with him...no excuse I know...

 

Dont forget that when you recieve your visting order to go visit him in prison.

Your not only doing him no favours, your also letting him think its ok which is a recepe for disaster. If you love him then report him.

[Y.D.R.M.D.Y? 10]

Yep threatened him with that too...it didnt bother him...the thing thats stopping me is hes my son....I know what yr going to say...and I know I'm not doing him any favours here...but its extremely hard to report your own child to the police isnt it...well it is for me...see I'm too soft with him...no excuse I know...

 

 

It's not your fault, same as it's not mine. Why do we have to lock/hide things away from our own family. It is a really difficult situation to be in. Unless it's happened to you, i don't thing anyone knows how awkward it is to deal with.

[Big Boy 10]

It's not your fault, same as it's not mine. Why do we have to lock/hide things away from our own family. It is a really difficult situation to be in. Unless it's happened to you, i don't thing anyone knows how awkward it is to deal with.

 

Your right on all counts but look at it from this angle.

By not reporting them to the police your letting them think its ok to steal. From family at first but that wont last. Soon itll be shops, other people, then other peoples houses. Before long they are in a particular lifestyle which is next to impossible to escape from. They may end up in prsion if they are lucky or they may end up stealing from the wrong person.

[daftlad 11]

I think unless you get the police involved it will not change. How much longer can you go on with money been stolen for. Money you have worked hard for is just been stolen by someone. He is taling the ****, wake up before its too late

[Y.D.R.M.D.Y? 10]

Unlike poppypoppy son, my brother takes coins which are lying around. He does it sneakily so i wouldn't notice. But i have this time. He wouldn't dare steal from shops, he too much of a coward and amature

[ksheff2 10]

Dont move the bottle!!!!!

Why the bloody hell should you???? It's your house and you should be able to keep what you want where you want, without the fear of having things stolen! (Especially from family!!!)

You must say something, though. Its going to be hard, but it needs doing.

 

You could always get your brother and your son together, (I know you know it's not your son), but that way, your brother wont see it as you're just confronting him.

Just say that you've noticed money has been going missing from the bottle, but, from now on...no-one is to take money from it. Make a point of stating that you're not having a go, or wanting an argument, but you felt something had to be said in order to put a stop to it.

 

Good luck

[muckymurphy 10]

you are in a good part to blame for this. you have provided him with beer, food and money while he has lived the life of riley. unfortunately for people like him everything will never be enough and they have to help themselves to more and this often means robbing their own family. they know their family will have to fight their conscience to sort this out. everyone is being robbed and everyone comes under suspicion. set up a camera to find out the truth. buy the camera with money from the bottle. just hope he doesnt steal the camera.