Who has the most slappable face in entertainment?

[timo 10]

Who would you most like to slap in the face, from the parade of talentless grotesques we are regularly exposed to on television, radio etc? In my case, I would like to don black leather gloves and repeatedly slap the face [Gestapo-style] of Cliff Richard. I would relish administering a thrashing to the unctious visage of the 'Peter Pan of Pop', as revenge for his sickly, oily music ['Mistletoe and Whine' etc], and 'Jump up and down for Jesus' Evangelicalism.

 

Other candidates might include silly little boys like Ant and Dec, the oafish, foul-mouthed Gordon Ramsay and the Corncrake-voiced, mincing Will Young.

[Lea1979 10]

Linda Barker and Sara Cox. i'd like to smack their heads together.

 

both annoy me more than anything else i can think of.

[timo 10]

Sarah Cox's horrible, in-bred, chipmunk-like Lancastrian face causes me great displeasure. However, I would never slap a lady [and Cox is, at least, anatomically 'female']. I might be tempted to pelt the slack-jawed, talentless mare with eggs, though. Does anyone understand a word of what Cox is saying? I know Lancastrians who have quipped that even they require 'sub-titles' whenever she engages in her bizarre speech patterns. They seem to be a hybrid of Bolton coloquialism, combined with the 'click-language' of the Kalahari, and an impression of a distressed Carrion Crow thrown in. How did this charmless moron ever get into broadcasting?

[Lea1979 10]

well. i am a Lancashire lassy (from near Bolton too as it happens) and everyone i know hates her with a passion. she speaks some weird martian type language. i just cannot stand her at all.

[Swan_Vesta 11]

Quite easily Jade Goody. Her facial features looks like someone has skinned a prozac addled pig's face and then laid the flesh over a semi deflated rugby ball.

 

"I'm not a minger!" Yes you are and you deserve a slap

[Greenback 10]

Oh, don't get me started on Linda Barker and the rest of the flouncing stick-a-bow-on-it-and-call-yourself-a-designer crew.

 

That lot aside, the painfully unfunny Chris Moyles could do with a bit of a going over, as could Ann "skin tighter than a bongo drum" Robinson and Davina "talent vacuum" McCall.

[timo 10]

Swan Vesta,

Did you know that the 'Crazy Frog's' horrible, fleshy features and deformed genitalia were modelled on those of Jade Goody? The Bermondsey 'minger' is clearly genetic refuse, and does indeed deserve several slaps.

[*Ryan* 11]

nadia from big brother,

[gatecrasher3 10]

Jimmy Carr, what a complete and utter freak show.

[timo 10]

Gatecrasher,

Spot on, old bean! Who does he think he is? We are constantly told that such people are 'top comedians', 'the new face of comedy' etc. The man is about as funny as the Ebola virus.

[SimonS 10]

For me it would be anyone in Hollyoaks.

Or Elton John.

 

Maybe they could all stand in a line and i could run down it.....

With a chainsaw.

[Carmine 10]

Justin Lee Collins!

 

The charges are:

 

1. Dresses in velvet jackets.

2. Sounds like Jethro the village reatrd.

3. Looks vaguelly like me, so now people are convinced I have an elder brother from Bristol who talks crap and gets on their tits on tv!