How can I make more of my life, and cheer my miserable self up?

[relost 10]

We never did meet up for that jam. I could have taken you all the way. You could have been as successful as me! Playing the finest venues Sheffield has to offer*.

 

Cracking wedding btw. I'm not usually a breast man, but that chicken was a-mazing. Your bloke is lovely. Why not share him? Selfish.

 

 

* Excluding the venues anyone actually goes to.

 

Haha! Thank you. Glad you could both make it. You are part of our mad family now you've been to a wedding. It's official! See you at yours?? lol Hope the house move is going well

[charlie9865 10]

Your not alone Hun, we have all felt lost under a dark cloud at some point in our lives. Life is a roller coaster if it didn't have ups and downs then, it would be pretty boring.

 

Even if it is hard and can be a pretty testing time in life. I will tell you it does get better, and I may seem harsh saying this but it could be worse.

 

I think that everyday I wake up, and I have another day of fighting a condition I have known as motor neurons.

I was diagnosed at 21, and then got really ill with it about 4 year ago.

 

I had always been active, and I never told hardly anyone about my condition. As I had not wanted to be treat any different. All the little things everyone else took for granted I made most of, I walked every where. And my kids loved that we was always on the go.

 

After the birth of my daughter just over 4 year ago, caused my condition to progress. I had suffered postnatal depression, and with stress causing my condition to progress. With the birth of my daughter added to it caused me to progress quicker.

 

I ended up on neuro rehab unit for 5 month , leaving my baby and 2 boys with my husband. The people I expected that would be there was not, I not only had friends let me down but family.

 

I never felt so alone, and what got me mad about it all?? The fact this 5 month was the biggest fight I ever had in my life. How do you find the energy to fight when so much bad is going on around you?? When so many people are making life hard.

 

Still I thought and got back on crutches, and was stable. Things got worse though, my relationship with my family dissolved. Which was no surprise, I spent most of my life running round wiping their backsides for them when I was on my feet.

 

I was so annoyed that at a time, when I was supposed to be making most of my time with my condition being progressive. I spent it running round for them, yet they had not spared me half of the courtesy I had them.

 

And I had been discharged from hospital, you would of thought I was thrilled. And at first I was, but I was used to hospital routines and the company. And all of a sudden I was alone to deal with being home.

 

Although I was able to use crutches for short periods I mainly depended on a wheelchair. My home wasn't adapted , I ended up living in my living room for a year. Was only able to wash at the kitchen sink.

 

I just gave up , in the end the pain I was in was to much and not only had I lost everyone. I felt a spare part at home, as the kids and my husband had now got their own routine.

 

The good news is, come December 2011, I had a spinal block done. Which has relieved my pain massively, and over time I started doing more for myself. It was all small steps, I started with just setting one goal a day.

 

Even if I got dressed and to settee that was something, then I built on that. I now have a great social life, I have made new friends and have my little family. I am back to being chief bottle and pot washer, cleaner, nurse, mum, wife and maid. lol

I go abroad, and I am pretty busy of lately and I finally feel the cloud has lifted.

 

You know what changed my attitude, meeting a mother with MS. Her kids had to do everything for her, from feeding to changing her. They never complained and was so young about 14 and 17. The lady never moaned or wore a frown. I realized in that moment, that actually I might have my disability. Compared to this lady I was pretty lucky.

 

So next time your feeling down just remember it could be worse.

I also find keeping positive helps, I have a calendar with positive quotes in my friend got me. I find if I am positive it makes my life seem more positive.