The capture, trial, conviction and execution of Saddam Hussein of Iraq

[disillusioned 10]

SADDAM LAYS DOWN WEAPONS WITH "PEACE AND JOY IN HEART"

Following world-wide marches for peace the Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein has today laid down all his weapons of mass destruction, ended all state sanctioned torture and executions, and declared Iraq to be a "centre of universal joy, love and harmony."

 

 

 

Peace, Protest and Shopping!

The President, standing on the steps of Baghdad jail, declared that his "soul had been touched" by the supportive actions of hundreds of thousands of people all over the western world. "I am so bowled over by this" he continued "that I have decided to end my nuclear weapons programme, offer up all my chemical weapons to Hans Blix - bless him - and immediately hand myself in to the War Crimes Tribunal in the Hague. What's the address again? Can I take a bus?"

 

 

Saddam's two sons Uday and Qusay then came forward to the microphone and - sinking to their knees - proclaimed that following the "outpourings of love and affection" from the protesters they too had decided to mend their ways and - from now on - end their programmes of Iraq-wide mutilation, rape and kidnappings and enter a "contemplative life devoted to the teachings of Gandhi, Nelson Mandela and - most saintly of all - Mother Theresa". Speaking for the Iraqi Republican Guard General Ali al-Majid, now bedecked with CND badges and pictures of sweet little Kurdish children formally announced "the total retreat of the Iraqi army from Kurdish areas, the ending of eye-gouging and mass rapes for a trial period and - most humane of all - the conversion of all torture chambers into softly padded bouncy castles - the kids will love it!"

 

Liberally spreading flowers and dispensing justice and harmony in equal measure, Saddam's half brother Barzan Al-Tikriti then came forward and asked for forgiveness. "What's the murder of several thousand members of the Barzani tribe between friends? Okay, okay I was young - all forgiven now though I'm sure!" he proclaimed as he was suddenly surrounded and mobbed by a crowd of several hundred peace loving 'human shields' recently arrived from Oswestry.

 

 

Greeting the news in London, crowds of protestors started cheering, with Mexican waves breaking out spontaneously. Protestor Laura Webb said, "It's clear that bombing a country, removing the genocidal totalitarian leadership and liberating its people is simply not the way to effect change. What we needed was crack teams of twittering, middle class liberals to go on a lovely, lovely march. How right I was. Ooh, there's Charles Kennedy over there!"

 

Warming to the theme, Stephen Knight of the Peace and Love Liberation Lib Dem Army said, "well, I know Saddam is not a very nice man but really," he whined, "you can't effect change in a country with military action. Look at Afghanistan. Look at Bosnia. Do you remember the Second World War you twits? I was all in favour of sending Saddam a tart note, or looking very stern or something. This has all gone to show how right I was!" as he then went off to Selfridges for a Saturday afternoon shopping spree.

 

Speaking to the Brains Trust, Middle East expert Dr Hugo Al-Hackenbush said, "it's true, a war on Iraq could kill many thousands of innocent people. But that's not what's important. What's important is that a few B-list celebrities, several hundred thousand well-fed, middle-class liberals - and Charles Kennedy - get a lovely day out in the beautiful sunshine and the chance to say how awful Tony Blair is. What could be more satisfying than that?"

 

 

Meanwhile, Saddam, now dressed from head to toe in sackcloth and ashes, with a dozen beautiful doves resting on his shoulders - a small badged picture of Charles Kennedy resting on his lapel - said, "It's true. I have been a little heavy handed in the past. 150 000 Shia Moslems here, a few thousand Kurds there. Systematic rapes, torture, eye-gouging, the starvation of my people, the use of chemical weapons. The deaths of millions in the war with Iran. The invasion of Kuwait. I was a bit misguided, it's true. But the sight of hundreds of thousands of good liberal people, marching up and down the streets of Paris, New York and London, marching for my right to continue my regime, to do the hell I like, to stay secure in my borders and rule my people the only way I know how - it brought a tear to my eye. And it would have brought tears to the eyes of most of my prisoners as well, had they any left. Falaqa, anyone?"

 

 

 

Taken from http://www.brainstrust.org

[halevan 11]

What a letter, what a subject, how right you are, these idiot's who went marching for peace are living in cloud cuckoo land. Do they really think that Saddam Hussain will give up his weapon's of mass destruction or change his way's?

 

If they do they must be mental! this murdering thug is determined to defy the world ( just like Adolph Hitler was ) and we all know what happened there dont we? These crank's that have travelled to Bagdad to be a human sheild should have their half a brain examined. :shock: :shock: :shock:

[DaBouncer 13]

Story Here

 

Reports are coming in that Saddam Hussein has been captured in Iraq.

 

The reports, from the Iran News Agency and an Iraqi Kurdish leader, claim he's been arrested in Tikrit.

Reports ARE unconfirmed at this time though!

[Internetowl 10]

more than likely one of his body doubles! but good news if its true - perhaps they'll chuck in the towel finally and our troops can come home

[RPG 10]

Its all confirmed now, DNA tests have been done apparently

[DaBouncer 13]

More News... seems a little more confirmed now. And Blair seems to believe the story.

 

Ousted Iraqi President Saddam Hussein has been captured by US forces in Iraq, the coalition says.

 

He was found hiding in a cellar in his ancestral hometown of Tikrit, Iraqi official Ahmed Chalabi said.

 

British Prime Minister Tony Blair has welcomed the news saying it "removes the shadow" from over Iraq.

[Sidla 10]

The Pentagon won't confirm it, but Blair will. Crazy.

[Internetowl 10]

interesting they'd got the video's of him out so quickly - talk about trying to rub it in. He looked very tired and unkempt on the video. Not much chance of a fair trial for him me thinks...in Iraq - it'll be an execution, in the US it will be internment without trial for the rest of his natural.

 

My tip, he should go to the War Crimes unit - he'll be able to share a cell with Milosevic!

[DaBouncer 13]

I think the pentagon have now confirmed it Sidla!

[Phanerothyme 12]

Originally posted by Internetowl

interesting they'd got the video's of him out so quickly - talk about trying to rub it in. He looked very tired and unkempt on the video. Not much chance of a fair trial for him me thinks...in Iraq - it'll be an execution, in the US it will be internment without trial for the rest of his natural.

 

My tip, he should go to the War Crimes unit - he'll be able to share a cell with Milosevic!

 

The last thing they want is him spilling the beans in front of a live telecast.

[tango2 10]

Originally posted by Internetowl

interesting they'd got the video's of him out so quickly - talk about trying to rub it in. He looked very tired and unkempt on the video. Not much chance of a fair trial for him me thinks...in Iraq - it'll be an execution, in the US it will be internment without trial for the rest of his natural.

 

My tip, he should go to the War Crimes unit - he'll be able to share a cell with Milosevic!

 

Does he deserve a fair trial,afterall did the millions that were murdered under his instruction get a fair trial.

Obviously the Americans will now use this for there own Media Circus to reinforce how good they think they are.

 

In the same way they won both world wars all on there own NOT !!!!

 

Not bad realy it only took them 8 months to find someone that was right under their noses all the time.

It has been reported that he was handed over and not caught,this story sounds more like the right one

[Mike 10]

Everyone deserves a fair trial - but I think we can rest assured that even with a fair trial, he'll either be executed or permanently incarcerated.

 

I know he wasn't exactly big on handing out fair trials himself, but to give him anything other than a fair trial is just sinking to his level, and would hardly help the already precarious situation in Iraq.

 

I think that the people of Iraq will want to see justice done, but on *their* terms, and not just handed out by the Americans like it was to Saddam's sons.