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Remember any old silly verses etc you were told as a child

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It's probably already been posted but anyway.

 

Scabs and matter custard

Snot and bogey pie

All mashed together with a dead dogs eye

 

Take a slice of mouldy bread

Spread the _____ ? thick

And wash it all down with a cup of cold sick.

 

:help:

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This is the version I was taught Megalithic ;)

 

Scab and matter custard

Toe nail pie

Dead dogs giblets

Cats squashed eye

Hospital phlegm

All nice and thick

All washed down

With a cup of cold sick :gag:

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Yum yum piggy's bum

Wrap it up with chewing gum

When it's sticky

Pull it's dicky

Yum yum piggy's bum

 

We had a variation of this -

 

Yum Yum chewing gum,

Stick it up your mother's bum,

When it's brown,

Pull it down,

Yum Yum chewing gum. :)

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This may already have been posted, I don't have time to read the whole 35 pages ;)

 

In days of old

when nights were bold

and toilets weren't invented

they dropped their load

in the edge of the road

and walked away contented!

 

 

Toby was a little dog a little dog was he

He cocked his little rudder up to pee against a tree

He saw some smoke arising and he thought it was on fire

So he cocked his little rudder up and peed a little higher!!

 

 

I remember a few more about The captain of the lugger and such but they're a little naughty to put on here!! :hihi:

 

 

Biggsy :)

Edited by biggsy
cuz eye carnt spel proply!!

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Not heard them before Biggsy :thumbsup:

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from my old headteacher at hammerton road school in 1961 "feet take me east feet take me west feet take me home again to tea and let me rest"

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Here's an old one from school, involving some local cigarette brands.

 

Little Willie Woodbine

Called for Gertie Goldflake

Took her for a Park Drive

Laid her on the Turf

 

Pulled out his Cork Tip

Pushed it in her Navy Cut

No. 9 months later

Out came Robin

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Aye tiddly aye tie I said

I saw a sausage fall down dead.

Seriously. My aunt Mag was always singing it to me.I wasnt keen,she had no teeth.

 

---------- Post added 22-11-2013 at 11:42 ----------

 

There was a young man named falls,

Who toured all the low music halls,

His favourite trick was to stand on his head.....

And roll round the floor on his elbows.........

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oil (hole) in my stocking,oil in my clog, if you don't gi me a penny i'll punch your dog. This was said after carol singing instead of the God bless you bit.

 

Our version ended with hole in me bum where the s*** comes through.

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Hitler has only got one ball

The other is on the kitchen wall

His mother, the dirty bugger

She chopped it off

when he was small

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Hitler has only got one ball

The other is on the kitchen wall

His mother, the dirty bugger

She chopped it off

when he was small

 

I learned this as

 

Hitler he's only got one ball

The other is in the Albert Hall

His mother

The dirty bugger

Chopped it off 'cus it was too small

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I learned this as

 

Hitler he's only got one ball

The other is in the Albert Hall

His mother

The dirty bugger

Chopped it off 'cus it was too small

 

It was originally more like:-

 

Hitler ,he only had one ball,

Goerrin had two but very small

Himler, was very similar,

But poor old Goebels had no balls at all.

 

--------------------------

Sticks and stones can break my bones, But whips and chains excite me .

Edited by beezerboy

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