Help! I'm No Longer Pretty! I broke My Nose!

[HappyHoosier]

Oi! Listen up! Those of you men who want abusing, queue up here and I'll be right with you. No pushing! No crowding! There's plenty of pain to go around!

[Jabberwocky]

Ill be honest with you all and tell you that Im an utter wimp. I know, I know that many on SF will find that almost impossible to believe, (hah) but Im willing to go through some pain to make myself appear humanoid.

My mush isnt a handsome one though, its lived a long and hard life, been used as a punch bag on many occasions, an ashtray on occasions as well as once being used to jack up a range rover, its also managed to stop a swinging, two ton sheet of steel as well as had various acids on it, so as you can probably imagine, its looking a little.... worn...

My other half quite likes it though, she says it has character ( The character of Hannibal Lector) and at the very least it stops trouble makers form attacking me when Im out and about- I mean, Im not the kind of bloke who worries about his delicate visage so Im not scared of adding a few more scars to it, unlike your average thug who wants to be pretty and scarless.

 

The snotter DOES look quite... startling though, I cant remember how many times its been popped over the years, but I also have a big dent in my skull at the side of my nose where I stopped a rifle barrel once.

On top of all that, I have several dents in my skull where various object have come onto contact with it at speed over the years.

 

 

Still, I have a LOVELY personality

[Appolo]

 

The snotter DOES look quite... startling though, I cant remember how many times its been popped over the years, but I also have a big dent in my skull at the side of my nose where I stopped a rifle barrel once.

On top of all that, I have several dents in my skull where various object have come onto contact with it at speed over the years.

 

 

Still, I have a LOVELY personality

 

 

That explains a lot of things mate how are you diddling?

[Jabberwocky]

That explains a lot of things mate how are you diddling?

 

Im diddling as many sheep as possible! Nothing to do with my many head injuries though, its just because Im a twisted pervert!

 

 

Long time no see, strangerrrrrrrrrrrr and its bloody good to see ya back here!

[shoeshine]

The snotter DOES look quite... startling though, I cant remember how many times its been popped over the years, but I also have a big dent in my skull at the side of my nose where I stopped a rifle barrel once.

On top of all that, I have several dents in my skull where various object have come onto contact with it at speed over the years.

 

I cant remember how many times its been popped over the years, but I also have a big dent in my skull at the side of my nose where I stopped a rifle barrel once.

On top of all that, I have several dents in my skull where various object have come onto contact with it at speed over the years.

 

All grist to the mill for an ex-NCP employee, I suppose, Jabber!

[Jabberwocky]

All grist to the mill for an ex-NCP employee, I suppose, Jabber!

 

Thats all BEFORE I started there! I darent make a list of the things I got while I was employed there, itd take all the SF bandwidth up

[shoeshine]

Long time no see, strangerrrrrrrrrrrr and its bloody good to see ya back here!

 

Hear, Hear, Jabs and Appolo!

[ShinyPurple]

LOOK!

 

I just want to be pretty again! Pretty like when I was-...

 

erm...

 

When I was...

 

When I...

 

 

Nooooooo.....you mean you'll never look like this again???!!!!???

[Jabberwocky]

Nooooooo.....you mean you'll never look like this again???!!!!???

 

Actually thats me now.

 

Look at that snot-cannon, its frightening!

[ShinyPurple]

Actually thats me now.

 

Look at that snot-cannon, its frightening!

 

I'm sorry...I know we aren't supposed to judge someone by looks alone but....well, frankly....it's not just your nose thats the problem is it? Quite honestly, you should really spend the rest of your life with a brown paper...better still...polythene bag over your head.