Ultimate singles thread - Part III

[KTHFB 10]

I didn't know you had split up, hope you're ok?

 

Fine and dandy! I'm better off out of it to be honest with you - tried to be a controlling boyfriend with me, I think not

 

Anyway - back on the market lads!

[Sazz1006 10]

Ha ha. Some men want labradors (faithful, loving, like nothing better than going for long walks and snuggling on the sofa) and some want labourers! I'd be no good to you, as I'm not a gardener either.

Yeah I work in a predominantly female orientated industry and to be fair, I wouldn't want to date another teacher anyway. The other men i meet obviously i can't date (parents!)

My hobbies tend to be the ones with people in their twenties. I am the oldest swinger in town unfortunately but it's what i like doing and a lot of my friends are in their twenties as i tend to have more in common with them. I also tend to fancy twenty something men but the older i get, the less they fancy me.

 

I think I need to grow up a bit, start liking gardening, knitting and sewing, and hobbies that are right for a woman of my advancing years, reading prima and best and then maybe I'll meet mr right at the horticultural society or something!

 

My bold!

 

I wonder when I'll feel grown up - I'm in my (very) early 50's and have been on my own 4 years now and never met anyone. I as yet have not succumbed to buying Prima! I've tried all the usual - could write a book on Internet dating- social groups etc. Everything aimed at over 50's attracts only the 'elderly' over 60's and I feel (and apparently look) much younger.

 

I spent Friday night on the Ecclesall Road wine bar trail and came home thoroughly depressed!

 

At least since I moved from my flat I now have a garden to potter about in .

 

Everyone says when I stop looking I'll find someone but I've stopped looking and I haven't!

[Robbie Loving 10]

Name is Robbie, 25 and profession is Lollipop man What a catch I am.

[epiphany 10]

God how sad that nothing has changed since I posted this.

Apart from the following...

I'm now 38:(

I've not seen Sheffnewb in forever.

 

Anyway today i'm feeling very single so i thought i'd repost. I've been on the dating sites for the first time in forever this morning for a browse and it seems the men on there aren't looking for a woman, they are looking for a labrador! Going on them really doesn't interest me anymore but I don't know how to meet someone anymore. :|I've tried actively looking for him, and just met the wrong ones. I've tried not looking for him and not met anyone. I feel I've exhausted all avenues but I really don't want to resign myself to being single forever. I've got more friends than I need so why can't I meet Mister Right?

 

I know this is a really easy thing for me to say but... have you ever considered that it might not be a problem being on your own? Like you say, you have friends, and good friends are hard to find in today's superficially moulded society.

 

It saddens me that people feel like they need someone to legitimise their existence, yet they may not even truly know themselves deep down (please don't take that as a bold assumption - just a thought).

 

I've often felt like there's this invisible pressure on me to "find someone" and "be with someone", which is when I did the whole dating site thing, out of curiosity. I just don't understand the logic behind this feeling. To me it seems more like an irrational inhabition that won't necessarily better myself. That may seem selfish, but there's a difference between selfishness to satisfy the outer ego and selfishness to satisfy your inner being, and I think it's very important to have a meaningful relationship with the latter. Far more important than any external relationship can do to validate your existence.

 

It also saddens me that people lament their age. I'm 25 at the end of this month and I have changed so much in the past 4 years. If I can keep growing and learning (more spiritually than academically), then age is but a blessing. A lot of the handrails we THINK we need in life, we don't at all - we are individuals first and foremost.

 

After coming out of a 6 year relationship, which was my first, I can't help but feel I wasted my years. It stunted my growth. It's only after truly being on my own for a period of time that I realised "what exactly AM I missing?"

 

Nothing of real importance in the grand scheme of things.

[*Turbo* 10]

I know this is a really easy thing for me to say but... have you ever considered that it might not be a problem being on your own? Like you say, you have friends, and good friends are hard to find in today's superficially moulded society.

 

It saddens me that people feel like they need someone to legitimise their existence, yet they may not even truly know themselves deep down (please don't take that as a bold assumption - just a thought).

 

I've often felt like there's this invisible pressure on me to "find someone" and "be with someone", which is when I did the whole dating site thing, out of curiosity. I just don't understand the logic behind this feeling. To me it seems more like an irrational inhabition that won't necessarily better myself. That may seem selfish, but there's a difference between selfishness to satisfy the outer ego and selfishness to satisfy your inner being, and I think it's very important to have a meaningful relationship with the latter. Far more important than any external relationship can do to validate your existence.

 

It also saddens me that people lament their age. I'm 25 at the end of this month and I have changed so much in the past 4 years. If I can keep growing and learning (more spiritually than academically), then age is but a blessing. A lot of the handrails we THINK we need in life, we don't at all - we are individuals first and foremost.

 

After coming out of a 6 year relationship, which was my first, I can't help but feel I wasted my years. It stunted my growth. It's only after truly being on my own for a period of time that I realised "what exactly AM I missing?"

 

Nothing of real importance in the grand scheme of things.

 

hmmm, feels as though i wrote this:thumbsup:

 

rather be on my own than settle for someone who wont make me happy. selfish? dont think so, done the unhappy in relationship bit:hihi:

[epiphany 10]

hmmm, feels as though i wrote this:thumbsup:

 

rather be on my own than settle for someone who wont make me happy. selfish? dont think so, done the unhappy in relationship bit:hihi:

 

Absolutely.

 

It does sound rather sad, in this day and age, for one to have a meaningful relationship "with themselves", and it can make you feel, or be seen as, bitter to reject social convention and be alone, but these relationship norms to me suggests how dependent we have become on emotional "handrails" and external validation of our own being.

 

When someone says, or even thinks "I need you", it's not a healthy thing IMO.

[KTHFB 10]

Can't say I've ever needed anyone. But a good cuddle from someone other than a mate would be nice from time to time

[kebab69man 10]

I'd post again on here - but I'm steering clear of men now! Last one put me off for a good while yet.

 

I think i must have that effect on woman. :hihi::hihi:

[EdnaKrabappe 14]

I know this is a really easy thing for me to say but... have you ever considered that it might not be a problem being on your own? Like you say, you have friends, and good friends are hard to find in today's superficially moulded society.

Yes but being single gets expensive! What can i say? I'm a person who is touchy feely, sociable and enjoys sharing stuff.

There's only so much you can share with your mates.

[KTHFB 10]

I think i must have that effect on woman. :hihi::hihi:

 

Don't worry, it doesn't last for long!

[kebab69man 10]

Don't worry, it doesn't last for long!

 

Mrs Vodka, if you want the cuddle let me know. But it has to be naked :)

[KTHFB 10]

Mrs Vodka, if you want the cuddle let me know. But it has to be naked :)

 

Do I know you?