I have new neighbours..poor things!

They seem perfectly nice...though we all know they are bound to have hideous flaws and defects which I will share intimately with you all over the next few months before their "For Sale Again" board goes up.

However, old pervy neighbour has......not cut their grass before leaving even though he previously tidied it with nail scissors he was so prissy. Has turned off their Gas and not let them know where the tap is...and I don't know...i'm a girl and ...he didn't leave light bulbs.

He also left faeces in loo and a dead dog in the garage.

Well not the last bit but the other stuff was unfair!

So do I befriend this lot or tell you all the stuff they do that annoys me?

They seem perfectly nice...though we all know they are bound to have hideous flaws and defects which I will share intimately with you all over the next few months before their "For Sale Again" board goes up.

 

However, old pervy neighbour has......not cut their grass before leaving even though he previously tidied it with nail scissors he was so prissy. Has turned off their Gas and not let them know where the tap is...and I don't know...i'm a girl and ...he didn't leave light bulbs.

 

He also left a turd in the loo and a dead dog in the garage.

 

Well not the last bit but the other stuff was unfair!

 

So do I befriend this lot or tell you all the stuff they do that annoys me?

Both, you daft bat! We'll get far more entertaining detail if you get to know them!

My bold

 

Both, you daft bat! We'll get far more entertaining detail if you get to know them!

I know...but I could just twitch a bit and then make the rest up.....like usual!

I know...but I could just twitch a bit and then make the rest up.....like usual!

If a thing's worth doing, it worth doing well!! Your standards mustn't be allowed to slip - look at all the effort Mojo's making with stalking herself and try and imitate that level of professionalism.

If a thing's worth doing, it worth doing well!! Your standards mustn't be allowed to slip - look at all the effort Mojo's making with stalking herself and try and imitate that level of professionalism.

Slick has standards?

Slick has standards?

Yes. You wouldn't know what they are though having failed to meet them on soooooooo many occasions.

If a thing's worth doing, it worth doing well!! Your standards mustn't be allowed to slip - look at all the effort Mojo's making with stalking herself and try and imitate that level of professionalism.

You're completely right. i shall go and bake a cake with a tape recorder insided immediately.

Then eat it and go and ask them if I can have a cup of tea and a chat. Inspired!

Yes. You wouldn't know what they are though having failed to meet them on soooooooo many occasions.

Yet you never fail to repeatedly give me the opportunity.....

To this day the words "we can try again in the morning" continue to haunt me.

You're completely right. i shall go and bake a cake with a tape recorder insided immediately.

 

Then eat it and go and ask them if I can have a cup of tea and a chat. Inspired!

Don't forget to write 'welcome' on their front lawn with weed killer

if you want to get rid of the neighbours sooner rather than later you could always invite dozy round & let her stand naked in your window, that'll scare the whole street:gag: