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Social Justice - How Far Do We Go?

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Caught a bit of this story on GMB this morning, and it prompted me to start a thread:

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-5287789/GMB-guest-says-children-not-best-friends.html

 

Apparently, kids having 'best friends' at school makes them 'possessive' and 'territorial'. She also mentions that boys have 'mates', but girls have 'best friends' (am I right to think this is another 'patriarchy' stab...?). Parents have called it ridiculous, but she's still managed to get it out in to the media which means it will be talked about.

 

How far are SJWs going to take it to create this utopia of inclusivity where everyone must be the same and get on with everyone? It's OK not to get on with everyone and have people in your life that you don't like. It's OK to have a different view of topics.

 

We are not all the same. We all have different emotional needs and desires, yet we seem to be at a part of human evolution where a person is no longer expected to have to strive; everything should be laid on a plate for them without the need to build a level of resistance to the bad things in this world.

 

How far do we think 'Social Justice' can be taken before the world turns in to '1984'?

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Its easy to get sucked in to the headline of "schools ban children having best friends", and at first I thought, here we go, more do-good'ing nonsense, but actually I have three school age children myself and I can see that when left to their own devices exclusive cliques do develop in class rooms and in the playground, and so I do see the sense in intervening and trying to make sure that they mix more broadly; that could be done by simply rotating the seating arrangement regularly in the classroom for instance.

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Social Justice - How Far Do We Go?

 

well, we could start? and take it from there...

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Its easy to get sucked in to the headline of "schools ban children having best friends", and at first I thought, here we go, more do-good'ing nonsense, but actually I have three school age children myself and I can see that when left to their own devices exclusive cliques do develop in class rooms and in the playground, and so I do see the sense in intervening and trying to make sure that they mix more broadly; that could be done by simply rotating the seating arrangement regularly in the classroom for instance.

 

But, by allowing children to choose their own friends, we're teaching trust and loyalty. By saying they must be friends with everyone, this is removing the need to learn decision making based on experience.

 

I was bullied a lot at school - why would I want to be friends with those people? And it wasn't because of the person I was, it was because I was different. What that taught me is how to learn to trust and what to look for in the kinds of people I wanted around me.

 

There's nothing wrong with 'cliques' if a few people gravitate towards each other based on their interests and personalities. We do it in adult life, why would we teach children any different?

 

---------- Post added 19-01-2018 at 12:46 ----------

 

well, we could start? and take it from there...

 

'Social Justice' started a while ago, hence many of the discussions on this forum.

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Assuming its the same Liz Fraser "parenting expert":

 

She is the glamorous former TV presenter who has just written a handbook for mothers who want to look gorgeous in the playground. The Yummy Mummy's Survival Guide recommends a pedicure before going into labour, stomach crunches after the birth and Jo Malone linen spray to rid the bedroom of baby smells.

 

Roll up, roll up, get your huge pinches of salt to go with this story here.

 

She's an "expert" because she's had experience. She's also a self-proclaimed expert in bulimia and nervous breakdowns because they also happened to her.

Edited by alchresearch

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I don't see what this story has to do with social justice. It's just bad parenting.

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I don't see what this story has to do with social justice. It's just bad parenting.

 

Maybe it was just my interpretation of what social justice is - the need to all play nicely and get along otherwise you'll hurt someone's feelings. The 'everyone gets a medal' for taking part types.

 

I'm surprised that 'safe spaces' weren't mentioned in the story.

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But, by allowing children to choose their own friends, we're teaching trust and loyalty. By saying they must be friends with everyone, this is removing the need to learn decision making based on experience.

 

I was bullied a lot at school - why would I want to be friends with those people? And it wasn't because of the person I was, it was because I was different. What that taught me is how to learn to trust and what to look for in the kinds of people I wanted around me.

 

There's nothing wrong with 'cliques' if a few people gravitate towards each other based on their interests and personalities. We do it in adult life, why would we teach children any different?

 

---------- Post added 19-01-2018 at 12:46 ----------

 

 

'Social Justice' started a while ago, hence many of the discussions on this forum.

 

Forcing children into uncomfortable situations is a good thing. Having to socialise with someone you wouldn't usually can break down barriers. Lets say the chief school bully finds themselves sitting in the class with a group of victims. Now that bully feels uncomfortable and vulnerable now they are out numbered amongst their victims. Now they experience the same feelings of isolation. Either that or they have to start mixing with others they never even contemplated. That's where the barriers should come down.

 

As for everyone being equal and none should feel worst or better off than another. I definitely think every person should have a level playing field when they first start out in life when it comes to access to education a stable home etc. It's a shame that as a society we can't seem to get this bit right. But if everyone had a good start in life, whatever they do with that start is their business after that.

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I’m not sure why the OP is so upset by the notion that schools should teach kids to get along with each other. It seems like a very good idea to me.

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I’m not sure why the OP is so upset by the notion that schools should teach kids to get along with each other. It seems like a very good idea to me.

 

Do you get along with everyone in life?

 

---------- Post added 21-01-2018 at 01:14 ----------

 

Forcing children into uncomfortable situations is a good thing. Having to socialise with someone you wouldn't usually can break down barriers. Lets say the chief school bully finds themselves sitting in the class with a group of victims. Now that bully feels uncomfortable and vulnerable now they are out numbered amongst their victims. Now they experience the same feelings of isolation. Either that or they have to start mixing with others they never even contemplated. That's where the barriers should come down.

 

As for everyone being equal and none should feel worst or better off than another. I definitely think every person should have a level playing field when they first start out in life when it comes to access to education a stable home etc. It's a shame that as a society we can't seem to get this bit right. But if everyone had a good start in life, whatever they do with that start is their business after that.

 

'Forcing children...'? Is that a good thing. Surely we should just allow children to be just that... children.

 

And children should be friends with everyone? Will you be saying that when it's birthday party time and you're having to pay for 30 kids because you don't want to force your child to whittle down the amount of friends they're allowed to invite?

 

And agreed, it's not how you start the race, it's how you finish. However, children need to learn from making mistakes. Forcing them to be friends with everyone puts them in a vulnerable position for later in life. I would think that they'd learn to trust everyone, instead of showing caution when meeting people who are unfamiliar. Without trying to be hyperbolic, i'm getting at, say, young girls believing that they should automatically trust any man who approaches them because they've been taught that everyone is friendly.

 

In a perfect world, you would have a point. But with human nature being as it is, and that we don't live in a perfect world, our children need to be prepared and that preparation comes from learning.

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And agreed, it's not how you start the race, it's how you finish. However, children need to learn from making mistakes. Forcing them to be friends with everyone puts them in a vulnerable position for later in life. I would think that they'd learn to trust everyone, instead of showing caution when meeting people who are unfamiliar. Without trying to be hyperbolic, i'm getting at, say, young girls believing that they should automatically trust any man who approaches them because they've been taught that everyone is friendly.

 

In a perfect world, you would have a point. But with human nature being as it is, and that we don't live in a perfect world, our children need to be prepared and that preparation comes from learning.

 

Quoted for truth. Training children to implicitly trust everyone (children), then telling them to trust no one (adults) is a recipe for confused children and unexpected poor outcomes.

 

Jamie Bulger.

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