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maidinsheff

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Everything posted by maidinsheff

  1. Hi Desperatedan I certainly remember goin fer a walk round t'lump - we used to race on our bikes round t'lump as well. I lived in Gleadless then and the 'lump' was from Seagrave Crescent, down the jennel and across the waste land, onto Welwyn Road and then Jaunty Lane and back up Seagrave.
  2. Another rejection slip hits the doormat! Somebody send me a smile......
  3. Hi Sir Nigel I loved this poem - made me smile I agree with Mantaspook about the name 'Westward Ho!' would be so tongue in cheek! I wish I could get to grips with the review blinking thing on my version of Word but I can't. I have made some suggestions which I think would help the poem to flow better. You can tell me to sod off if you like (I'm a Northern lass - I can take it!) If you read the poem out loud you may see what I mean. He’s calling his dog in the high moorland fog where folks climb the pathway to ramble and jog He’s shouting its name with growing despair his voice falling flat in the deadening air He comes across me; wonders, where can it be? and tells me the cost of this rare pedigree. Up here you can stroll and see not a soul. But you nod when you do ‘cos they’re up here like you. But this beer-bellied chap in his Adidas cap just lets the dog crap. Leaving copious piles over treacherous miles And you don’t get a nod from the ignorant sod. Somewhere out there where the track rises steep He let it go crapping and snapping at sheep. All Poop, No Scoop, and **** like pea soup. I tell him don’t worry but you may have to hurry your dog may alarm a cantankerous farmer. And likely as not could be callously shot. Now he heads west unsuitably dressed. Westwards is harsh - just tussock and marsh. I walk on with pride I helped him decide; “It’s that way.” I lied.
  4. Hi Coyleys Why do you only partially like my last remark? quote "I partially like the last remark" unquote Which bit of it didn't you like?
  5. Hi all - I've posted a piece for July (bit late I know) entitled Lottery http://sheffieldwriters.ath.cx/SFStoryArchive/1280780653.doc Maidinsheff
  6. Wow - American English! Figured that one out straight away with the use of 'period' instead of 'full stop'. Personally, I can't abide Americanisms. We have Bill Gates to thank for spreading it across the world and contaminating our every day lives. However, being a northern lass I shall stick to my English English - as anybody who truly loves the English language would. I also think punctuation can get in the way of creativity. Spending time fretting over whether to use a comma, a semi-colon, or a dash is something I wouldn't worry about.
  7. http://sheffieldwriters.ath.cx/SFStoryArchive/1270485244.doc I was going to write a piece of prose on the theme of Spring - a murder mystery but my OU assignments have been taking up most of my time of late. I did have a bash at a poem. I have had several goes at this one but it still comes out fairly stereotypical and not very original but I thought you may like to read it. My OU course finishes in May so hopefully I will have more time to join in then. Maidinsheff
  8. Hi Daveybee I enjoyed reading your poem – it has incredible rhythm and pace, almost like a drum beat, like a rap song – was this intentional? The rhythm falters in places but on the whole it works and has some good imagery. I think hypercritic should be hypo-critic. I was disappointed to see the reference to ‘slavery’ as it seems anything to do with blacks has to hark back to those days. I would have liked to have seen something more contemporary – eg the machete and gun wielding gangs which control most of Haiti’s neighbourhoods. The looting and lawlessness which is nothing new but which has impeded the aid relief and rescue efforts. This looting is not brought about by starvation as people would have us believe but by opportunism. These guys aren’t nicking food. There is no comment about the kleptocratic government or the dictators of the Duvalier/Aristide vein which have helped reduce Haiti to its present state. There is also already a very ‘healthy’ trade in fraud, trafficking, kidnapping and extortion going on in Haiti without the intervention of any well-meaning adoption agencies. http://travel.state.gov/travel/cis_pa_tw/cis/cis_1134.html I think your poem would be much much stronger if it dealt with the more pertinent problems in Haiti rather than finger pointing at ‘whites’. Set this against the spirit of those who hope for a better future for their kids – remember the image of the little boy who was rescued and handed to his mum? If not, go to: http://mommylife.net/archives/2010/01/haiti_toddler_b.html The look in his eyes says everything and crosses every language and cultural barrier on the planet. It gives us a glimpse of the ‘real’ Haiti if it were, as your poem suggest, ever allowed to blossom. Hope this helps. Maidinsheff
  9. http://sheffieldwriters.ath.cx/SFStoryArchive/1267281295.dot February subject of Politics and Religion - er don't know much about either - however it did inspire the uploaded poem. Don't know whether it is any good as I am not much of a poet. Any feedback most welcome Maidinsheff
  10. You may wish to take a look at Michael Rick's work as well. He's a Sheffield artist and does some fantastic work. Very atmospheric. By the way we use the word 'colour' in this country. Not 'color' as our mates over the pond are apt to.
  11. Speech. (Word 2007 .Docx file) GL Note If the above link doesn't work try > Speech. (Word 2003 .Doc file) I hope I am doing this right I failed miserably at the first hurdle as I could not come up with a speech (wedding, after dinner, or otherwise) but the challenge did inspire me to write a small piece - entitled 'Speech'. I would be interested to hear what other people think of it. I know it doesn't fit the bill but I can ask to be let off the hook this once, being a novice and all. Thanks MaidinSheffield
  12. The best thing about Yorkshire is South Yorkshire!
  13. Ooh another thought. There is no new water on the Earth. Oh god it has been recycled through dinosaurs!
  14. Oi Coyleys! I take it that Douglas Florian is/was an American with his meter 'as in gas meter'! I totally agree with you. You can muck about with the rules when you know them. Picasso trained as an artist long before he started his unique cubist style and although people insist that a chimpanzee could paint better they cannot. Poetry isn't about chucking words onto a page any more than art is about chucking paint onto a canvas - the artsy fartsy world may kid themselves into believing half a cow in formaldehyde is art but does it wash with you? I think ordinary people are an awful lot more discerning than 'Art Critics' ever are. I thought Sir Nigel's poem was great and has even greater potential if he pays attention to the metre and form (the lack of it would certainly be picked up on by any potential publisher) - learning the tools of the trade is the hard bit but worth every moment of study. I started from 'ground zero' to coin a phrase and I am passionate about the English language and have a profound love of British poetry in all it's guises. Poetry is like a bottle of scent or a good wine. You need to be captivated by it, by the idea, the feeling, the moment, whatever is being expressed. Whether the poem is sad, tragic, funny, ironic it doesn't matter but in the real world poetry has a hard time. Most people's eyes glaze over when poetry is mentioned. Ever heard Tennyson's droning voice? Geilgud could bore the scales off a fish when it came to reciting poetry. I am sure he put most people off poetry forever with his ability to render even the cleverest poem droll! That's why poetry has to be top notch; any imperfections are a complete turn off. I disagree with Florian - THERE ARE RULES - and I am damned sure he knows them inside out!
  15. Hi Sir Nigel I like the idea and context of this poem but felt that it lost direction and I am not quite sure what you were trying to achieve with it or of the point you were trying to make. The metre and form are wrong in some places and make it awkward to read as it does not flow - a bit like bumping over the cobbles -try reading it aloud and you will see what I mean. Water is something we take absolutely for granted in this country and we abuse it without thought - just find the nearest stream and have a look at the junk thrown into it. My god if we had to depend on such streams as the source of life! Maidinsheff
  16. Thanks for the picture Joan L - I can't imagine Newhall Road changed much between the 20s and 60s. I think I can remember my mum saying she caught the Millhouses tram to travel to work.
  17. Hi I'm the newest member of the group having joined this afternoon. I have always loved making up stories (this is before I realised it was 'creative writing')and not me just day dreaming again. I left secondary school with no qualifications and was just about illiterate. I have improved a bit since then! I love to read and have a pic-n-mix approach as I will tackle anything that looks interesting although I try to ignore the hype on the back cover and form my own opinions. Recent reads are 'What's Eating Gilbert Grape?, The Corum Boy, The Secret Life of Bees, Pig Heart Boy.' My favourite reads are Jane Eyre, The House on the Strand, The Time Machine, The Power of Three, and so on. I have my own library of several hundreds of books which are currently languishing in the garage as I don't have room in the house for them. I am looking forward to e-meeting you all and sharing the highs and lows of creative writing with you.
  18. Hi Magneteer both my brother and I worked for Twist Drill in the late 60s early 70s. He worked on one of the lathes and I worked in the warehouse packing the drills. I too remember the 'world's smallest drill' story but I remember it coming from America not Japan - unless it was an American company based in Japan. I remember the oily stink of the lubricant they used on the lathes - it looked like greasy milk. We had to wrap drills in waxed paper before boxing them. By the end of the day our hands used to be black and sore from all the little cuts you used to get from the metal and you could never get shut of the stink no matter how many times you scrubbed your hands and nails. I remember my brother Steve getting a metal 'splinter' in his foot, it went all the way through the sole of his boot and embedded itself in his skin.
  19. Hi - I am also tracing my ancestors. I am looking for Ada Wright (nee Matthews). My great grandad Philip Wright was living in Sanderson Street in 1911 aged 51 and is shown as a widow living with his five children. Family heresay has Ada dying from Yellow Fever which she caught when they lived in South Africa between 1900 and pre 1911. I know she made it home to Sheffield but the trail goes cold there. Any chance you could have a look to see if she is buried in Attercliffe or Tinsley?
  20. I did my BHS riding stages at Stubley Hollow - I remember I was always given an enormous 18 hh grey to ride - I think his name was Oliver but don't quote me on that. I remember the indoor school very well as we had all our lessons in there. I don't remember the owners being overly friendly - she was a little no nonsense woman and the husband seemed to always be making himself look busy. The grooms lived in a messy domitory above one of the barns. We had to get changed there once when doing the BHS exams.
  21. My mum lived at 25 Newhall Road - I am guessing that would be the opposite end of the road to where you lived. Is the Adelphi up near Attercliffe Road. I drive along there sometimes and seem to remember an old dance hall on the right hand side as you go into Sheffield.
  22. Thanks Kidorry - I never realised they were such substantial houses - can't imagine why they were all demolished - when you think what the 'replacements' turned out to be like.
  23. Does anyone remember when the grave stones in Christ Church Gleadless grounds were set into straight lines? It may have been in the early 1960s. I remember them being higgledy-piggledy and fallen over - sunk into the ground etc when I was very young and a member of the Sunday school there. Mr Sharp was the vicar in those days - he used to take his dog (a border collie or a sheepdog type) into church with him on Sundays.
  24. I'm currently researching my family history and have discovered my mother was born in a house on Newhall Road. I have just dowloaded Rick Mick's painting - which I think is brilliant and is just the sort of thing my mum used to reminisce about - especially the trams. Am I the only person here thinking that Sheffield has lost it's way in recent times and maybe it ought to ressurect the cutlery industry (I don't mean the steel industry)? I think 'Made In Sheffield' still oozes quality.
  25. Anyone have pictures of Newhall Road or Sanderson Street around 1920s? I can find plenty of images of Attercliffe but nothing specific for these two areas where my Grandparents lived. Thanks MaidinSheff
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