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  1. I generally just whip a few Choirboys.
  2. They have my name incorrect on my passport - which is their tough luck since I have a criminal record.
  3. Do they still sell Pegs, or am I a little behind the times ?
  4. Right, so are they going to change the advert against piracy from "knock off Nigel" to "knock off Numtaz " ?? Yeh right.
  5. The decision in 1997 to cease allowing Pension Schemes to claim back Tax Credits on dividends had a comparatively small effect. The main reason that Pension Funds are in the brown stuff is that the FTSE 100 should be at circa 15,000, not 5,000.
  6. There used to be a blind man who wandered around the fish market. He just kept muttering " morning ladies" for some reason.
  7. So it's OK if it has a bit of straw floating in it then, and it gives you the trots ?
  8. Ask him if he is for, or against, a sixth terrestrial television channel. Also, count your fingers after shaking hands with him.
  9. It is a pity that you didn't report it, these people could do it again. Obviously your reasons are appreciated.
  10. Did the Police do anything about the rape ?
  11. I dislike being told to " get off and milk it ".
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