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Tarquin

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Everything posted by Tarquin

  1. The Verve - The Drugs Don't Work The Stranglers - Golden Brown (not legal but a drug none the less)
  2. Take Up Thy Stethoscope and Walk- Pink Floyd Brain Damage- Pink Floyd One of My Turns -Pink Floyd
  3. How many songs are there with a medical link? Could this be one? The Beatles - While my catarrh gently weeps
  4. A Welshman buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination. The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant. The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself. So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the Land Rover again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed exhausted. Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round. Try again.' he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods He spends all day shagging the sheep and upon returning home, falls knackered into bed. The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. . . . . . 'No,' she says, 'they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn.'
  5. 4 operations now;good to see that he is stable:thumbsup:
  6. Would loved to have been there;will have to be content with the"Love tattoo" cd in the meantime:cool:
  7. Where is the "one place/situation" where you you wish "time would stand still" ?
  8. Surely they wouldnt do that ? If that happened, any "Tom,Dick or Harry" would then get in :hihi:
  9. Do you think we will ever see "Peace in our time" ? What with 30+ wars going on at the moment, maybe a bit off "peace" or at least a bit of a truce like the football match during World War One on Xmas day 1915 wouldnt go amiss. Ok,I need therapy;) Play those "Pipes of Peace"
  10. You could always take your Granny:hihi:
  11. I cant hear the first one but can hear the second one:o
  12. Let me know how you get on.I sadly cant make the gig tonight:(
  13. No,she waited for the Pete & Katie show for that;)
  14. She's just a very weak imitation of Jordan:loopy:
  15. Ruth out & Eoghan stays:huh:
  16. Its on after X factor .It starts at 9.15:thumbsup:
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