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daverity

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Everything posted by daverity

  1. I was working in Leeds a few months back and was watching the local news on telly there one night and half remember seeing something about this too. If I remember correctly they were going to relay a long disused track through the Pennines and use it to get HGV's and other goods vehicles off the trans-Pennine roads. Seemed like a good idea to me:)
  2. Dear oh dear yet another example of a totally successful sense of humour by-pass operation performed on a member of Sheffield Forum BTW as you use 'positives' in the plural, your sentence should read 'are no positives' If it gets much worse though I might have to abandon the family home because we are rather too close to the River Mersey for comfort :help:
  3. Surely if you have an open mind then you would be described as being agnostic? Anyway I see God and religion as a completely man-made concept so I'll put myself in the atheist camp.......it is after all a non-prophet organisation.
  4. Financial crisis, I would say most definitely Guderian. We're used to most clubs running with deficits but I don't know of any with one of 630 million like Man U. In recent years it's been obvious that things haven't been quite as a rosey as you would believe even before the Glaziers arrived. You had Chief Exec. David Kenyon jumping ship to Chelsea something I always thought strange and the fact that when they bought Rooney off us they could only stump 12 million in cash for the deal: the rest was on the drip over 12 months or so and this nearly scuppered the deal because we wanted something like 19 million straight off. Ferguson I would say most definitely now has his hands tied behind his back in the transfer market but he forgot his principles when after the Americans took control he agreed to stay on after being a vociferous opponent of the takeover bid.
  5. The only madness Angelus is in the topsy turvey world down at the 'Bridge' which means that somebody is prepared to pay 35 million for a 30 year old striker. Just because Chelsea did it, doesn't mean it's right. No club in its right mind would pay that kind of money for such a player but when you're backed by Abramovich common financial sense goes out of the window it seems. As far as RVN going to Madrid, maybe they could have got another couple of million out of the Spanish but no more and they risked Real walking away from the deal when they clearly needed the money to finance the Carrick purchase. I suppose when you're 630 million in debt and the whole world knows it, you lose some of your bargaining power in negotiations? :suspect:
  6. Moving slightly off subject but still on the theme of American dating, I wonder why the good old drive-in movie never really took off here? In fact I'm not sure if we have ever had them here in the UK at all. They always struck me as quite a good idea, being able to sit in the comfort of your own jallopy watching a film and not having to worry about complaints of excessive noise or flatulance from other cinema goers during the screening. Also quite good I would have thought for 'dating' if you know what I mean! They also could perform a vital use when closed during the day as venues for criminal gangs to conduct shady drug deals or have a good old Hollywood style gun battle between rivals.
  7. I’m very surprised that so far no mention has been made of Harris’s part in the shameful rebel cricket tour of 1977. Harris and the sinister Dr Benaud, were approached by the late Australian media tycoon Kerry Packer, to organise a breakaway tour of the then Apartheid South Africa. Harris’s scorn for the South African regime meant that he refused Packer’s invitation and embarked on organising his own rival tour. Harris, believing the regime of P.W Botha to be far too democratic and liberal, then oversaw the infamous series against the Cambodian President’s XI. Being a personal friend of the then leader of this South East Asian country, Pol Pot, he arrived with the tour squad in the capital Phnom Penh to a rapturous welcome. Pot himself was purportedly a keen cricket fan and rumoured to have been a competent middle order batsmen and possess a devilish leg break in his youth. During the tour Harris and the Cambodian despot would, according to eye-witnesses, engage in net practice using human skulls instead of cricket balls and Harris was often heard to quip ‘Bet yer can’t do a flipper with one of those Pol me old mate’ . On non-playing days the two would, accompanied by two Thai lady-boys, take a boat up the Mekong River using automatic weapons to ‘bag a water buffalo for the barby’ or sightseeing in the ‘Killing Fields’. It was on one of these trips, whilst listening to the ‘Doors’ and heavily under the influence of opiates, that Harris penned the 1977 12 inch Cambodia re-mixes ‘Thai Mai Kangaroo Goes Down On Me Sport’ and ‘Two Little Thai Lady-Boys’. All went seemingly well for the world’s unofficial roving ambassador of evil until tea on the third day of the second test at the Phnom Penh Oval. With the visitors enjoying a commanding lead over the Khmer Rouge XI, Harris decided to treat the local spectators to an example of his artistry. Armed with his trademark pots of paints and brushes, he made his way to the pavilion end of the ground and commenced painting one of his famous murals. He apparently had the crowd in stitches, occasionally shouting out in his pidgin Cambodian what he thought was ‘Can yer guess what it is yet?’ but what was in fact ‘the President likes to dress up as a French maid at weekends’. Pot who had been visiting the sponsor’s hospitality tent during Rolf’s impromptu shenanigans emerged and seeing Harris daubing paint over the Pavilion End sightscreen and make lewd suggestions about his sexuality, immediately had the game abandoned. Harris and the whole tour party were promptly arrested and then immediately deported from the country as ‘persona non gratis’ due to their perceived counter revolutionary behaviour. To this date, amongst Cambodian society, the whole incident is often referred to in hushed and embarrassed tones. One leading luminary and Phnom Penh socialite was recently heard to say that the odious creature Gary Glitter’s behaviour in the country paled into insignificance compared to the shameful visit of the sociopathic and hedonistic Harris all those years ago.
  8. Timo, I’m saddened to see that a normally rational mind such as ‘Cycleracer’ has shown himself to be nothing more than an apologist for the demonic Harris. The Simon Weisanthal Centre in Vienna, an organisation that of late has been faced with short-time working and the prospect of lay-offs has taken up the cudgel against Harris and some of the members of his ‘axis of evil’ I am led to believe. They are seeking to make the practice of ‘Harris denial’ a crime in itself and errants after trial by International Law subjected to some of the condign punishments served up by Harris himself, such as being ‘happy slapped’, I believe that is the current nomenclature, with a wobble board to within an inch of their miserable lives.
  9. Dear oh dear Freddie Garrity as controversial in death as he was in life! :rolleyes:
  10. Try saying that after a few drinks! On the subject of Waitrose, aren't they supposed to be one of the few supermarkets that actually pay producers and farmers decent money for their products?
  11. Perhaps emboldened by Timo’s brave exposure of the evil Harris but more likely by several pints of Stella this afternoon, I feel perhaps it is time to lift the lid on some of the more unsavoury goings-on in his world. Harris organised his followers on military lines and I was a member of his elite bodyguard the ‘Leibstandarte Rolf Harris’ and as such was privy to many of the high level decisions made within the higher echelons. One such decision was made in the function room of an Earls Court pub one evening back in the late 80’s. Harris had recently been turned down by the BBC, for a children’s art programme; preferred, much to his chagrin, by the convivial and popular Tony Hart. I was used to seeing the nasty side of Harris but this snub by the BBC had made him the worst that I think I ever saw him. Driving him back from Broadcasting House he had ranted, at one point almost foaming at the mouth, shouting ‘I’m the daddy of children’s arts, that ******* Hart is going to be sorry for this.’ His mood grew steadily uglier throughout the day as he continually drank ‘Bundy’ rum and after several more outbursts he hurriedly convened a meeting of his closest allies, or the’Junta’ as he liked to call them, at the pub. The ‘Junta’ consisted of Clive James, Paul Hogan, the sinister Barry Humphries accompanied by his ‘constant companion’ Jason Donavan and the acknowledged mastermind of Antipodean evil Dr Benaud, a man whose cold gaze from behind his pince-nez spectacles could send shivers down the spine of even the strongest man. It was decided that Hart had to be taught a lesson and removed from Children’s BBC- this became what is now infamously known in televisual history as the ‘Night of The Long Palette Knives’. The Leibstandarte were dispatched along with Harris (by now hideously drunk), the thuggish Hogan and his para-militaries Combat 55 (the 5 stands for ‘E’ the fifth letter of the alphabet, in recognition of Edna Everidge) to launch an assault on Hart’s house and studio. The place was surrounded and I remember the chilling words of the callous Hogan when he said ‘At my signal unleash hell’. What followed was a savage attack as poster paints, crepe paper, toilet roll tubes, Rowney drawing pads and other art materials were thrown onto a pile and ceremoniously burnt. I thought to myself then ‘We’re burning artists materials now, we’ll soon be burning little plasticine people.’ Harris was like a man possessed during the attack jumping on empty cornflake packets, snapping pencils, intoxicated not just on the ‘Bundy’ but with the adrenalin of this orgy of wanton destruction- the look in his eyes epitomised pure evil. Hart, understandably, was heartbroken and had to flee to safety claiming refugee status with an ITV company, he never worked I believe again for the BBC. I, sickened by the whole incident, fled Harris’s evil web and took up life under an assumed name two streets away from my old house (well I’d miss my local!). I had vowed never to reveal the intimate details of this shameful chapter of my life but I think now after 20 years it is time that the public know the truth behind these cuddly Australian personalities that grace our TV screens, the shadowy underground world that they occupy and their nefarious schemes.
  12. Is perhaps the fact that you're only 5 foot tall something to do with that? :hihi:
  13. Timo, It is usual I know for many people to pay tribute to your towering intellect but on this occasion having read this thread I wish to pay homage to your undoubted bravery in facing up this unsavoury individual and ‘going public’ as I believe is the current terminology. I can only wish that I had not kept quiet about Harris for so long but your relentless pursuit of the truth about this man, has inspired me to tell what I know. Harris has for years now been involved with a secret sect devoted to devil worship and the corruption of youth throughout the world. I provide photographic proof HERE which clearly shows Harris in the guise of sect leader. I’m ashamed to say that I came under the spell of this sect many years ago when I was presented on my birthday with a contraption called a ‘Stylophone’. Little did I know that this innocent looking device was actually programmed to pass subliminal messages to the user, whenever you attempted to play any of the seemingly harmless ditties that ‘Rolf’ had presented as examples in the accompanying literature. Once under the spell of ‘Rolf’ or as he prefers to be called within the sect ‘Grand Wizard Dunny’, what had been a promising primary school career degenerated into a misspent youth as I became embroiled in Rolf’s sinister organisation and its nefarious aims. As this is a family forum, I will spare some of the lurid and salacious parts of the sect but Harris used his popularity to further his other desire, that of world domination and the establishment of a new world order. Witness HERE his neo-facist sympathies as he addressed his faithful, whipping them into hysteria at a rally, and THIS PHOTOGRAPH secretly taken as he cavorted with other meglomaniacs at a clandestine conference back in 1986 at the Moscow Conservative Club. I feel sure that if the UN Inspectors had turned their attentions on Harris sooner, they would have found all Hussein’s Weapons of Mass Destruction right there in the potting shed at the bottom of his garden, not as they believed in Iraq- such is his stature amongst the world’s evil elite. I count myself one of the fortunate ones in that I was able to escape the sect, others I don’t believe were as fortunate. There was that hideous commercial of the 70’s, ‘Teach Kids to Swim’ when he was sharing a swimming bath with a dozen or so children and gleefully telling us how he had nearly drowned when he was a child. Thirty years on what has become of those children, has anybody ever bothered to check? No, of course they haven’t, yet more irrefutable evidence of the evil that is Rolf and his insidious grip on the media. I have to go now as I fear for my own safety and I’m due to go out for a pint with me old mate David Icke and I need to iron my turquoise shell-suit but keep up the good work Timo old chap, just watch your back though because Rolf’s disciples are everywhere!
  14. Back when I had one of those silly curly perms we were talking about a few minutes ago, we were the best....the early 80's. I often bore my kids rigid telling them about it and making them watch the videos. :hihi:
  15. I'm not playing this game there's no Everton teams in it!
  16. Being out of the country for the past 6 weeks, I honestly didn't know until I saw this thread that he had been jailed. Just what you'd expect from the arrogant little sod though to lodge an appeal; as someone mentioned in a previous post what happened to 'do the crime do the time'? I'm surprised also that he's not been made to do some kind of retest after his bans finished, I thought most people had to these days? Will he be referred to now as the 'Convict formally Known As Prince'?
  17. Brilliantly subtle Meaksy PMSL :hihi:
  18. Being married to a Catalan, I haven't got much choice in the matter if I want to keep the peace in this house......... It's Arsenal all the way for me, she's an Espanyol fan and hates Barça!
  19. I'll speak to Mrs V and see if she's going to Tesco's but normally she's shops at Morrison's I think. I know a character or two though that could probably kit your lad's school and your house out dead reasonable though! :hihi:
  20. Hang on Kiddick, is this some ruse to get a new PC in your house to replace that gas-powered one that doesn't work anymore? :suspect: :hihi:
  21. If this was a Welsh Forum he would be considered a hero! Anyway how do you know that the goat wasn't up for it, a Welshman I once knew reckoned they could be right little temptresses, you know they look at you a certain way................ :hihi:
  22. Sky Sports 3 mate, coverage starts at 8.30 game at 9pm
  23. Right see what you mean but the prints do return (I've worked in the construction industry a lot too). Was reading an article a few months ago about the software they are wanting to use to digitally record prints and they identify apparently 40 odd different points- even if you have rough hands they will still be able to pick out enough points to recognise you-from memory (of what I read) the police only need about 12 or 13 points on a print to be able to make a positive match.
  24. Totally agree Don, he's an odious and arrogant little sod
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