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lifegoeson

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About lifegoeson

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  1. hi ime doing ok up to now thanks,hows yourself x
  2. worlds AIDS day today...This morning TV brings the risks home to everyone any body seen it xx
  3. Some people can be so hurtfull with what they say with comments about HIV. People like me with HIV and on medication and regulary monitored do not get AIDS... So why do people say hes got AIDS when they know nothing about it this is what came out in conversation one night while me and my family were With a group of friends... I so wanted to tell them just to see there reactions but wasnt the time or place **** em all and thanks for putting me on a total downer !!!!
  4. Thanks for all your advice and kindwords to everyone .... sat chillin we a glass of Red wine lol... the bottle will follow xx
  5. crimewatch tonight just shows Rape can be reported years after, I just not sure if im'e ready or ever will be.. then theres that policewoman on corrie ide hate to get someone like her.
  6. thankx salsafan i think mens health could be a good choice, does anyone know how i can contact then to see if there interested xx
  7. I think a book would really bring things out for everyone, Its just something i wouldn't knowhere to go for help or for publishing if it was thought to be good enough... plus i aint that good we the writing context either lol but something i may do.. would like to thank everyone for all there support and kindness to my post,took a lot for me to do it but i am so glad i did xx
  8. are comments still being able to be left on here ? i aint had any sinc i added my last reply x
  9. I had not even seen the guys while i was out or even nodded my head at em or anything I had been out with a group of mainly women from work and I as i always did made sure they got there taxis so i new they were gonna be ok. It was not a late night so i decided on a kebab and walked while i ate it we a friend,he went one way and i went the other to then try flag a taxi myself to no avail. I got to the top of rutland road and turned left uptowards shirecliffe. I was half way up when i first saw the guys bit rowdy but dint think owt of it at the time and carried on walking, next thing i new they wer behind me i couldn't see there faces or anything. I was then being shoved in to side were its open ground we trees don't know what its called, i was then in a headlock shoved to the ground and held there by there feet and raped by each of them. thats about as much detail i can and want to go in to. Did i ask for it i think not ...
  10. When i posted this i wanted to get people aware of HIV and try give more understanding about it if that makes sense. yes the assault did take place in sheffield
  11. i was assaulted on 28th november 2008 which is when i got infected,i had to wait 12 weeks as this is how long it can take to show up. I then got my results on the 5th of march 2009,,
  12. At the time when it happened i couldn't report it i felt so DIRTY and HUMILIATED. And knew i couldn't cope we all questions. The guys who did this i never knew them or ever met them before in my life, It was just a random attack which was quite vicious at times. I Wish i could make them pay for infecting me and for putting me through all of this hell. Things still go through my head now did one of them know they had HIV ? lf so how could you knowingly risk infecting someone else. I hope one ot them is reading this you destroyed my LIFE but now its slowly getting better as i have all i need round me...
  13. thankyou so much mrsmozzy.it looks and reads far better,you got a job when i draft my book lol....xx
  14. SOMETHING i thought would not effect me,how do i find myself here writing this,iv'e seen articles on here and the contempt they get off narrow minded people,just really need to see my story wrote down how a then 41 year old married guy with kids and grandkids getting infected with HIV 2 years ago... I can imagine what you’re thinking reading this. I got sexually assaulted by 3 guys after a night out which totally changed my life forever – it was 2 years ago, March 5th at 11.13am 2009. Yeah, exact time and date, I remember it that well...getting a phone call from the GUM (sexual health) clinic from the nurse, while getting ready to take my wife to work for her shift. She said that I needed to get antibiotics as I had chlamydia as a result of the RAPE. I knew I needed to get myself checked out for my wife’s health too; imagine after 25 years of marriage worrying about having sex with your own wife for 16 weeks, as I could not get a HIV result till after 12 weeks. I got accused of going elsewhere, having an affair, as in her words she knows I “cant go without SEX”. I couldn’t tell her why, as I never told anyone about what happened, only my counselor and doctor at the clinic. Going back to the phone call: I thought RELIEF! In a week I will be FINE. Five minutes later I get another call from the same nurse, saying I really needed to come in ASAP to see the doctor. My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach; I felt SICK. I JUST KNEW I had AIDS AND THAT WAS THE END OF MY LIFE! Yeah, my own narrow-minded view too. And yes, my WIFE was still there in the room: I couldn't think straight. I dropped my wife at work, came home, rang the clinic straight back and asked them if I had AIDS. The reply was “I’m sorry, I can’t discuss this over the phone. Come in for 2pm.” I put the phone down and fell on the bed, thumping the mattress, kicking my legs and crying, thinking “How long have I got to live?” I had just over 2 hours to wait to go to clinic, which was like forever (I cant even remember driving the 20-minute journey) but I got there. I waited 1 hour and forty five minutes to get called in from the waiting room to see the doctor. I went in and sat down. There was a female doctor who just looked at me. I said “I’m HIV POSITIVE.” She nodded, saying “yes”. I went to jelly, even though I knew already. I asked how long I had, as I thought (as people will do NOW) that I’d be dead in few years. When she told me I could and would live a normal life and still reach my 80s and more, and had more chance of dying from cancer or a heart attack than an AIDS-related illness, I was a little relieved. I’d see my grandkids grow up and get married; that was a good thought. She also told me that it could be between 5 to 15 years before I needed to be medicated - it all depended on my CD4 count and VIRAL LOAD, which would be tested over the coming weeks and months. I got infected with HIV on 28th November 2008, which was 4 months previously. Over the next few weeks months my bloods were monitored. It got to July: yet another row over sex as we were still not having it. My wife walked out. I cried and was really down. I wanted to end things so I got some tablets which I knew would do it, and went for walk. I ended in up in the woods as I didn’t want to take a chance on being found before it was over. I was seen walking in distressed state, and my wife was told. She then came home and found the tablets were missing. I was on anti-depressants already and so was classed as vulnerable, so the police were informed. I eventually got found and was sectioned for 37 hrs at the NGH. After I was released I was under Edmund Road for 6 weeks with home visits as well as going to them – talking, talking, talking all about how best to tell my wife, who still did not know. I was ashamed and embarrassed: how did I get RAPED? WHY ME!!!???? Eventually I let my health advisor arrange for my wife to come in for testing. I took her, still not being able to tell her I was positive. I had taken the coward’s way out a few nights before and texted her, saying I couldn’t tell her to her face that I’d been RAPED and I needed her now more than I ever needed anyone. We’d been married at 17: how could I not talk to her about this??? When she came out after her tests I asked if she was ok and what had been said. She said she was ok. I didn't know and she didn't say whether she had been told I was HIV POSITIVE till a few weeks later. We were alone and had a drink and heart to heart; she told me she knew. I said, “knew what?”; her reply was “You’re HIV. I’ve known since my test.” I couldn't say anything else. She said, “I’m here for you.” I told her I’d been scared to tell her; we both cried and cuddled. It felt GOOD; the weight on my mind lifted. She came to my appointments from then on; she got her own health advisor counselor too, and we would chat at home later. By August I was advised to start taking retrovirals, which were four tablets to be taken at same time everyday for the rest of my life. I wasn’t expecting this so soon; it had only been 10 months since I’d been infected and only 5 months after my diagnosis. Eventually my CD4 count is rising and my viral load is now at ZERO. That’s it for NOW - sorry for going on and on! xx A BIG THANK YOU FOR MrsMozzy for taking the time to sort out my post
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