Padders

Why Bournemouth.. Send them to Cleethorpe's, it could do with some improvement...

Reminds me of Edwina Currie, she finished up with egg on her face.

There's a big plus to sitting down. Another person can pee between your legs, saving time and water...

Yeah, I've got both state and occupational pension. I just cough up with a grimace..

Mines K712. God knows what it means, more tax I presume. 😑

YES! Lets have em Hung, Drawn, and Quartered.

Well done "Dan" its a start, Keep it up and don't push yourself too hard. Remember it's not about winning in life, is about taking part. You can do it pal

So we've got Brexit done and dusted, and it seems to me that isolationism is very popular at the moment, not just with with England but the Scottish too, and the Cornish, in fact everyone. So if you gave the people of Sheffield the chance to form their own government and their own state, I bet you any money a majority would say "Ooh, yes please" Certainly the idea of Sheffield breaking free from the shackles of Westminster is very appealing, we could form our own police force to reduce crime, even a small army! We could issue our residents with a firearm, so we could easily hold out if were attacked by Barnsley or Rotherham. We have meat, trout and vegetables, we could trade jam for oil, and we have wind power. Taxes would be very low, since we'd need fewer schools, fewer doctors, and fewer fire stations.. And we could introduce new laws relevant to our way of life.. We could ban cyclist's and Horse riders, on the face of it, then, life would be very peachy. But would it work? I ask. To understand where this might end, we have to go back to the "Dark Ages" This was a time when British explorers stumbled on a tribe living on the tranquil shores of Lake Victoria, people had been living there for tens of thousands of years, assuming that they were the only people on earth...They had never met anyone from another tribe, let alone an Arab or a white man. And it's interesting to see how their society had developed.. They had not invented the wheel or the plough, but they had invented beer, and they would carry it around in vessel's woven exquisitely from reeds, they also had fine cloth and knew to wash their hands in the lake before eating, but they had also come up with the idea of extreme violence.. If a child was making too much noise over lunch, it would be beheaded, if it got up without clearing it's plate, that would be a beheading offence too.... Beheading was their society's equivalent of the naughty step, It was also a cure for snoring, nagging, or looking at someone in a funny way. And it gets worse, you could end up as one of the Kings wives, bound to the floor and forced to drink milk for eight hours a day, non-stop. This ensured that when the head honcho fancied a spot of rumpy-pumpy , the girl selected would be nice and fat, then she would be beheaded! Now remember, this was in the dark ages, elsewhere in the world there were steam engines and ladies with parasols taking tea in the park, people in India wore clothes made in Huddersfield, people in Louisiana drank tea from Ceylon, and yet this was a civilization in which you could be beheaded for talking with your mouth full.. What stopped this was other people arriving, people that said "Yes, cutting your daughters head of is certainly one way of teaching her not to use her fingers at meal times, but have you tried a stern word, or a smacked bottom, because where we come from that works quite well too" This argument is still relevant today, why have American police forces stopped waterboarding pretty much everyone they take into custody? The answer has nothing to do with the the inner goodness of their souls, it's the sure-fire knowledge that other people are watching. Why was Robert Mugabe a monster? Because Zimbabwe was cut off, allowing him to do as he pleases, and no one ever said "Are you sure" It's the same closer to home, we have the Isle of Man which is not really part of the UK. and people from abroad are viewed by the locals as Romulan stormtroopers, it was 1992 before they stopped birching gays in front of a baying mob, come on, birching is so last week, maybe one day soon their idiotic government will also learn it can't go around confiscating peoples gardens. It's the same with the death penalty, most people want it reintroduced, but what for, at first it would be for premeditated murder and rape, but how long before were hanging people for having a beard, or for looking like Boris Johnson? or for shouting at mealtimes, child molesters and bell ringers would be hung from lamp posts by lynch mobs. Take the case of Abu Hamza, every fibre of your being wanted him gone and you didn't really care where, if he'd ended up becoming part of a flyover on the M1 you'd have been relieved.. So should Sheffield become a Republic? have our own government, do as we please without outsiders keeping an eye on us. Would it be a good thing? think carefully...........

I can remember "Candid Camera" repossessing a STD. bus at Ecclesall terminus. They told the driver that the bus company had fallen behind on the payments

Will it affect my Curried King Prawn?

She used to present the "Weakest Link" television show up to 2012. Not seen her since...

Mafya talks a lot of sense Hackey....

It's a Drain Cover H. Please don't use the word "Manhole" Padders Bar clientele find it very offensive!

Not for Rotherham.

Yep, right on cue..