[CheesiNibbla]

Picture the scene. Man who has never done a day's work in his life meets girl of 19 and has a child to her. Man gets fed up of woman and child and leaves them to fend for themselves. Three years pass and single mum is told by DWP that she must start looking for work. Single mum has bright idea. She only wants to have another child with the loser man so she doesn't have to work.


Now is it me or is something very wrong with a system that allows people to do such ridiculously selfish things? I have nowt to say really. Just wondered what you thought.

Surely something needs doing. If you can't support the child don't have one. Is it that hard?

[Shiesh]

loser child then copies Mam and Dad.....yeah you have a point!
At least they might be able to sell their stories to 'Take a Break' for some beer money!!

[Ouija]

I think one of them should work to support the child/ren. A lot of people seem to focus more on blaming the woman though. In a situation like that, they're both to blame. I think either one should work full time or they could do part time between them.

[melthebell]

dont want to work? dont work

?

sounds easier to me

[*bobcat*]

Originally Posted by Shiesh

loser child then copies Mam and Dad.....yeah you have a point!
At least they might be able to sell their stories to 'Take a Break' for some beer money!!

Who do you think keeps Jeremy Kyle on air

[ContraryMary]

The flaw in your debate is that a single mother would not be forced to look for work when the child is 3.

[CheesiNibbla]

Originally Posted by OuijaMan

I think one of them should work to support the child/ren. A lot of people seem to focus more on blaming the woman though. In a situation like that, they're both to blame. I think either one should work full time or they could do part time between them.

I agree entirely and I'm not directly blaming the woman. Though the decision to have another child is hers. There's not much chance of the father getting a job. He's 36 now and hasn't worked a day in his life and commits a lot of small crimes. More than anything I blame us muppets for putting up with such crap. Sure I believe in a welfare state but not a welfare life.

[CheesiNibbla]

Originally Posted by melthebell

dont want to work? dont work

?

sounds easier to me

No. Want kids, support them. Sure don't work if you don't want to but whilst millions of workers are supporting you then no, share the load.

[jen13kd]

what about maternity leave though????? surely you're not against this?

[CheesiNibbla]

Originally Posted by ContraryMary

The flaw in your debate is that a single mother would not be forced to look for work when the child is 3.

I'm not aware of the facts regarding the age a child has to be before the mother is asked to work. In fact I may have been a little out on age, I believe the child starts some form of school soon. Maybe September. I don't have kids so I don't know. I was concentrating on the attitude of the parents rather than the age of the child. Sorry.

[Plain Talker]

Originally Posted by ContraryMary

The flaw in your debate is that a single mother would not be forced to look for work when the child is 3.

That's never stopped him (her?) yet....!

[CheesiNibbla]

Originally Posted by jen13kd

what about maternity leave though????? surely you're not against this?

Maternity leave would suggest the woman works. I have no problems with maternity leave or as said before the welfare state. I do have a problem with the attitude of 'I can't be arsed so I'll just prolong it for a few more years by having another'.

Is it right to have another child when you can't support the one you have?

[fox20thc]

Originally Posted by CheesiNibbla

I'm not aware of the facts regarding the age a child has to be before the mother is asked to work. In fact I may have been a little out on age, I believe the child starts some form of school soon. Maybe September. I don't have kids so I don't know. I was concentrating on the attitude of the parents rather than the age of the child. Sorry.

I am of the understanding that a single parent is not obliged to seek employment until the child is either 10 or 11. I personally have worked since my youngest was 3 mths and up until recently was a lone parent. I still work but its alot easier now I have a supportive and understanding OH.

I continued to work after my relationship broke down because I didn't want to get stuck in a trap of not having a job. Work brings many rewards, not just financial.

[Heyesey]

Originally Posted by CheesiNibbla

Is it right to have another child when you can't support the one you have?

We had about 18 pages of this debate, not a month ago - here.


The example you post is at one extreme of the possible spectrum. I'm curious to see if anyone supports it.

[Berberis]

Originally Posted by ContraryMary

The flaw in your debate is that a single mother would not be forced to look for work when the child is 3.

Not at 3, only once the child is in full time education, but the mothers benefits will be cut if she does not attempt to obtain paid work.

[CheesiNibbla]

Originally Posted by fox20thc

I am of the understanding that a single parent is not obliged to seek employment until the child is either 10 or 11. I personally have worked since my youngest was 3 mths and up until recently was a lone parent. I still work but its alot easier now I have a supportive and understanding OH.

I continued to work after my relationship broke down because I didn't want to get stuck in a trap of not having a job. Work brings many rewards, not just financial.

I agree with what you say about work. Some just don't see that. Let me make it clear. I'm not slating single parents. My mum was one and she worked all her life with us. That's my point. What's gone wrong that makes people have that attitude? Is it because we allow it?

[CheesiNibbla]

Originally Posted by Heyesey

We had about 18 pages of this debate, not a month ago - here.


The example you post is at one extreme of the possible spectrum. I'm curious to see if anyone supports it.

That new search thing isn't doing its job then. You're right it is extreme, hence the thread.

Now I could delete the thread or let it just dwindle away. Which would you prefer?

[Ouija]

Originally Posted by CheesiNibbla

I agree entirely and I'm not directly blaming the woman. Though the decision to have another child is hers. There's not much chance of the father getting a job. He's 36 now and hasn't worked a day in his life and commits a lot of small crimes. More than anything I blame us muppets for putting up with such crap. Sure I believe in a welfare state but not a welfare life.

No I wasn't referring to you. I was just saying that some people do seem to find the woman more to blame in that situation, which I think is unfair as it takes two and all that! Although I misunderstood your original question, I thought it was just hypothetical.

I do think that one of them should work/attempt to find work. It doesn't have to be the bloke but in the early days it sometimes makes sense for the woman to do childcare and the man to get a job.

[mr_busdriver]

To be honest, I am getting sick of the Jeremy Kyle contestants and it seems in this day and age they are not a rareity.

I personally have nothing against someone who is down on their luck, and is recieving benefit to tide them through the bad times, this happened around 15 years ago when people lost their jobs.

However, many of these benefit scroungers are the scum of the earth, they get a free house, breed like rabbits and then make noise until 3am in the morning, keeping their working neighbours awake at night. The ones who drive around in the fast cars at 3am in the morning with their BOOMCHI BOOMCHI music going off

Accepted if someone falls pregnant once, fair comment, to me we all are allowed one mistake, however when its 5 kids to 5 fathers (and the fathers are as responsible too) then to me, there has to be a cut off point..... to me 2 kids out of wedlock is enough for anyone.

I have to convince my son, that its worth him getting off his backside and doing a days work in about 5 years time. If he does an minimum wage job for 50 hours per week, then sadly he won't be able to afford a home, however get a few girls pregnant, and he can have a dozen free houses

[Heyesey]

Originally Posted by CheesiNibbla

That new search thing isn't doing it's job then. You're right it is extreme, hence the thread.

Now I could delete the thread or let it just dwindle away. Which would you prefer?

Let it stand - this is a less general question than the one asked by Cyclone.