[laughalot01]

for a very long time now we have had problems with our son he is 7 years old his anger an temper an how he can just switch from being good to bad an stuff we have spoken to many offical people about advice an help an been told he is fine no problems well he has just frieghtened to kill me with a knife an they say nothing is wrong im gobsmacked i cant believe it i now dont know what to do we know he has problems with anger you can see it in him when he starts i feel so sorry for him an feel useless that i cant take the anger from him. please tell me children dont come out with things like that normally what can i do any advice please no sarky comments because this is hurting me an i dont know what to do

[Venables]

"Show me the boy of seven, and I will show you the man"

Not sure who you have seeked help from, but if you havn`t.....do.

[*Peaches*]

this sounds like what is happening with my brother. He's been to see specialist after specialist, they all just shrug their shoulders. He set fireworks off in the Odeon, causing 15k worth of damage, he's tried to set fire to fences, fields, the kitchen ceiling, thrown stones at fast moving trains, you name it he's done it.

He can switch and change his moods from one minute to the next, he can be the nicest kid one minute and spawn of satan the next. He's almost 14

[cgksheff]

Children do come out with things like this quite often.

Other than that there is no real answer as we don't know the ins and outs of your family circumstances etc.

[mel77]

any traumatic events (family crisis, bereavement, seperation, rows etc) in his life that could contribute to post traumatic stress?

does he sem better/worse before/after food? E'numbers can make some children's behaviour very different and aggressive

x

[Saff]

Is there anything else you worry about or is it just his anger? How's he getting on in school- maybe he just saves his outbursts up til he gets home where he feels he can relax a bit. Does he have difficulty understanding some things and is it from frustration, or is it because you are not allowing him to do something?

[discodown]

Either he is somewhere on the autism spectrum toward aspergers, has potential problems with food allergies, has anger management issues, a hormonal imbalance, some sort of trauma he is trying to deal with or is just a bad kid. I seriously doubt its the latter

[laughalot01]

peaches he is like that sweet 1 min then the next just flip trash things lash out alsorts i just dont know what to do i feel iv failed him so much i just wish i knew the anger an take it away for him he tries punching himself kicking glass doors tries smashing them an he is only 7 i dont know how much more i can take or he can take before he hurts himself or some1 else

[Rich]

Not wishing to be picky, but from what I can gather, the OP's son shows all teh classic signs of a possible case of asperger's syndrome.

I know this from experience as I was the same (and to a lesser extent, still am sometimes), I'd get in touch with Prof Digby Tantum at St George's Hospital and get him tested for asperger's or some form of autism.

[funkymiss]

Have there have not been any big upheavals or upset in your lives recently? He could just be reacting to this. However, if not, it's even more important that you push for a full assessment for him. There are different types of disorders he may have and it's really important that these things are ruled out or otherwise helped.

Is it the doctor/school you've sought help from?

[Saff]

Originally Posted by *Peaches*

this sounds like what is happening with my brother. He's been to see specialist after specialist, they all just shrug their shoulders. He set fireworks off in the Odeon, causing 15k worth of damage, he's tried to set fire to fences, fields, the kitchen ceiling, thrown stones at fast moving trains, you name it he's done it.

He can switch and change his moods from one minute to the next, he can be the nicest kid one minute and spawn of satan the next. He's almost 14

That reminds me a bit of bipolar disorder- Stephen Fry has it and he sounds a bit like that!

[mel77]

Originally Posted by laughalot01

peaches he is like that sweet 1 min then the next just flip trash things lash out alsorts i just dont know what to do i feel iv failed him so much i just wish i knew the anger an take it away for him he tries punching himself kicking glass doors tries smashing them an he is only 7 i dont know how much more i can take or he can take before he hurts himself or some1 else

we'd need to know how he is in other areas of his life, whats he like in school, any learning problems? whats he like socially? just naughty at home?

[*Peaches*]

I know what your talking about, my brother has been like it since I can remember. He's never had any "tests" though, my mum doesn't believe in that sort of stuff

[funkymiss]

Originally Posted by laughalot01

peaches he is like that sweet 1 min then the next just flip trash things lash out alsorts i just dont know what to do i feel iv failed him so much i just wish i knew the anger an take it away for him he tries punching himself kicking glass doors tries smashing them an he is only 7 i dont know how much more i can take or he can take before he hurts himself or some1 else

It's not your fault at all, laughalot. Sometimes there are chemical/hormonal imbalances at work. You're right to be concerned about his behaviour, it's important you are listened to. have teachers mentioned any problems at school, what's he like with friends?

I know a bit about developmental disorders but not an expert... All sorts of things are possible. Or it could just be he's reacting to something at school or another type of worry.

[discodown]

Originally Posted by Rich

Not wishing to be picky, but from what I can gather, the OP's son shows all teh classic signs of a possible case of asperger's syndrome.

I know this from experience as I was the same (and to a lesser extent, still am sometimes), I'd get in touch with Prof Digby Tantum at St George's Hospital and get him tested for asperger's or some form of autism.

Agreed, what he said. If the test turns out negative then at least you know

[laughalot01]

he has had temper since was a baby but as he is getting older they getting worse just been an thrown his school shoes at me im trying my hardest not to show him its getting to me but how do you deal with it without them thinking they can get away with it

[Rich]

Don't go through the School for any kind of diagnosis, not sure what they're like now but in my day they tended to bury their heads in the sand over this kind of issue, they labelled me "dumb" and a "difficult" child 20 odd years ago when I was going through problems at School relating to anger etc.

[discodown]

Originally Posted by laughalot01

he has had temper since was a baby but as he is getting older they getting worse just been an thrown his school shoes at me im trying my hardest not to show him its getting to me but how do you deal with it without them thinking they can get away with it

By not letting him get away with it? My son is on the autism spectrum and can be agressive, destructive and violent. That doesn't mean that he shouldn't be told off and punished when he does wrong

[Halibut]

Originally Posted by Saff

That reminds me a bit of bipolar disorder- Stephen Fry has it and he sounds a bit like that!

With respect Saff, I disagree. Bipolar illness tends to manifest itself in much longer cycles of mood - e.g. months of depression followed by several weeks/months of manic behaviour - than the OP is describing.

[laughalot01]

he is like it at school aswell but they say they havnt the resources to deal with him an its a small school