Backing down in arguments

laughalot01 · 05-05-2008, 15:29

well as most of you will know i have not spoken to my partner since thursday an we are both as stuburn as eachother an i have decided to back down an make up but still feel it shouldnt be me that has to .so when you have an argument do you find it easy to back down even though it isnt you that should do

SYorksDeano · 05-05-2008, 15:35

I never back down because like you I am stuburn. But if you want to put things right one of you has to make the first move

*binty* · 05-05-2008, 15:37

I don't back down. Only once have i ever backed down from an argument and that was because i was being stupid. I'm very stubborn. It's always D2J that backs down. I could go for hours/days without talking to him, being mardy etc etc

If i was really cross with him, mind.

raskel · 05-05-2008, 15:42

I'm very very stubborn, I can happily do the silent treatment, which drives most people mad. I know it doesn't help... but im to stubborn to back down.

shihtzumad · 05-05-2008, 15:46

life is to short to argue, but we all do it am afraid, make him a cup of coffee and talk about it.......good luck

SYorksDeano · 05-05-2008, 15:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by shihtzumad

life is to short to argue, but we all do it am afraid, make him a cup of coffee and talk about it.......good luck

Just don't throw or hit him with the cup or contents

bigthanks · 05-05-2008, 15:56

Like I said in your other thread my and my OH take it in turns to back down. I also agree with ****zumad, life is too short to fall out and argue with the ones we love (although sometimes a good ol' arguement is needed).

Savannah2 · 05-05-2008, 16:01

Had disagreements, but never had an argument. We just normally talk any problem over and easily reach an acceptable conclusion.
We are both so mellow to distance ourselves from each other by getting in heated arguments.

demoniac · 05-05-2008, 16:26

i back down if i feel i am wrong which is very rare

like savvy im more mellow that a sleeping hippie

lyndix · 05-05-2008, 16:33

I`ll back down eventually, but only on the understanding that I wasn`t wrong.
A sort of we`ll agree to disagree sort of thing!!

TheTwirler · 05-05-2008, 16:45

Ha,

Interesting topic, there's currently a bit of the old silent treatment going on in our house.

I've been really poorly and the girl i live with decided to get the lawnmower out and cut the grass earlier while I was trying to sleep, after being awake all night really ill.

Bloody women. I'll probably start talking again in a bit when I feel my point has been made..

lyndix · 05-05-2008, 16:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheTwirler

Ha,

Interesting topic, there's currently a bit of the old silent treatment going on in our house.

I've been really poorly and the girl i live with decided to get the lawnmower out and cut the grass earlier while I was trying to sleep, after being awake all night really ill.

Bloody women. I'll probably start talking again in a bit when I feel my point has been made..

But are you really poorly or is she just annoyed at you for pretending (men have a tendancy to do this)to be poorly?

fox20thc · 05-05-2008, 16:55

Now laughalot, I recall when you had major barnys with him before and he buggered off back to Sheffield. You need to sort this out and have a good old chat!

TheTwirler · 05-05-2008, 16:57

Lol lyndix.

I really am poorly. I'm not dying or anything, but poorly enough to be kept up all night and in bed all weekend.

And thats a bit of a sweeping statement lol..

JayneRay · 05-05-2008, 16:57

take the moral high ground be sooooo nice to him he will releaise how wonderful you are

depoix · 05-05-2008, 17:10

never back down....it's a sign of weakness, in the future any arguments that arise the fact you backed down will be thrown in your face and used against you,stand firm or lose the case,thats now or in the future as your partner will say that you admitted you were wrong last time,even if you werent and only wanted an end to the situation for peace and quiet,it will still be brought up next time ,if there is a next time

scarby · 05-05-2008, 17:11

It just kinda resolves itself after a while.

Tipex · 05-05-2008, 17:13

never backing down will cause more arguements. If this happens alot and you're not in the wrong, then i think he needs a rocket up his arse and out!

lyndix · 05-05-2008, 17:14

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheTwirler

Lol lyndix.

I really am poorly. I'm not dying or anything, but poorly enough to be kept up all night and in bed all weekend.

And thats a bit of a sweeping statement lol..

Hmmmmmmmmmm, I don`t believe you.

RosyRat · 05-05-2008, 17:47

Gosh, Laughalot, does it matter who was right or who was wrong in a quarrel? What matters is you and him and your lives together. Don't let pride mess up a loving relationship. Making the first move is a sign of strength, not weakness. It's the toughest thing you can do, as you're taking a risk that you can avoid, by keeping up the silent treatment.

Every moment you have together is precious as it'll never happen again. Go and tell him you love him and that you know there'll be quarrels like this in the future, but that you'll learn how to deal with them together. If you make the first move you've every chance of staying together. If you keep the quarrel going, you'll lose him. Do you really want that?