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My Dad used to work at Peats (butchers) next to the Wednesday ground on Penistone Road in the middle to late sixties. On match days he would take the pies round to the ground and the doorman would take my autograph book into the visitor's dressing room and I got the whole team's autographs. Unfortunately my mum threw my autograph books away years later.

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My Dad used to work at Peats (butchers) next to the Wednesday ground on Penistone Road in the middle to late sixties. On match days he would take the pies round to the ground and the doorman would take my autograph book into the visitor's dressing room and I got the whole team's autographs. Unfortunately my mum threw my autograph books away years later.
I got Pele and several other santos players to sign theirs while they where staying at the Hallam towers after they had played wednesday in the early 70s

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Collecting Autographs 5.

 

Further to When you meet a player (3). I pointed out face to face full frontal can be a dangerous business, because you could meet up with a player who might be the type to karate chop you á la cybernaut style from The Avengers.

I remember one Saturday being at Bramall Lane at a Central League match atween United and Liverpool. I went to this game because I needed to get some pictures signed. All those years ago the Liverpool reserves always seemed to win that league because the team was always star studded. Anyrooad, when the Liverpool coach (us) arrived at the players entrance there was a bit of a crush and one young lad (9ish) got himself advertently into the face to face full frontal position. Within seconds the young lad landed on his backside sat in a puddle of water…tut, tut Mr Toshack!

 

 

8. Jackie Bestall.

 

Mr Bestall, who originated from a one dog dead end village called Beighton which is now in the clutches of Sheffield City Council, was a footballer who later became a manager. This little bloke played a few games for Rotherham and several hundred for grim Grimsby. He later managed Blackburn and Doncaster (twice). In 1968 he managed again at Donny in a caretaker capacity until Lawrie McMenemy took over. In about 69-70? He was given or granted a testimonial match at Belle Vue where a load of allstar players would perform. The evening of the match was cold, blowy and rainy and I was soaked to the skin. There were plenty of autographs to be gotten and I did get some , but I forwent most opportunities because I didn’t want to get me annuals etc soaked. The game I saw (got in by forcing a corrugated iron sheet) was quite drab but it did have it’s bright moments because of three players from my team who were there. Hugh Curran, Derek Dougan, and my favourite Wolves player Dave Wagstaffe.

The match referee was Mr Maurice Fussey of Retford who always made me laugh, and not just by his decisions. During matches he had a strange shuffling gait which was quite amusing, but when he started to sprint the crowd would be in hysterics. His legs and arms would go 10 to the dozen. He was worth the admission price alone if you paid it. He once in the mid 60’s blew for time 10 minutes early, I think it was at Blackburn. There must be footage somewhere surely.

 

After the game I got some more autographs and had a short chat with the Wolves trio which was very enjoyable…for me too. Time had flown by and I realized I would miss my train back to Sheffield and that meant me mother would send out the police and army to search for me. It occurred to me the only way to get out of being in trouble was to phone home and tell me mum I would be staying at a friend’s house who lived on the Charnock Estate. I then thought I’d have to sleep on a Downy station bench ‘til the morning then bunk it back to Sheffield then go straight to work/school. (I can’t remember if I was at school or work at the time. I started to work summer 1969. I can’t recall what year this Bestall match was…sorry).

 

I had a stroke of luck though because I’d just recognized a face. The face belonged to a man with a ruddy complexion that made him look as though he was constantly embarrassed. He also had slightly reddened hair and I knew (don’t know how) he lived somewhere on or near to Prince of Wales Road. The man was leaning with his back to the wall and he had his hands tucked into the pockets of his knee length dark blue raincoat. He was obviously waiting for someone.

 

I sidled over to him and greeted him with “Up the Owls”. He looked at me with a small smile but with a look of unrecognition, understandably. I did the statement / question thing by saying, “You’re Kenny Burton, aren’t you?” That pleased him, footballers like to be recognized. It must be the ego thing. I explained I had missed me train to Sheffield and I was stranded, than I asked him in an imploring way if he could give me a lift. He told me he didn’t drive and that he had come with somebody else in their car. I then asked him to ask the other bloke if I could have a lift back to Sheffield. He said he would ask him but he couldn’t promise I would get a lift.

 

I got distracted for a couple of minutes because some more stars were coming out, then I heard Kenny Burton call me with, “Hey up, come on.” And beckoned me over to follow them. I had been granted a free ride back to Sheffield. Due to the darkness in the car park I didn’t get to see the other man’s face. I sat in the back and soon nodded off, perhaps missing out on scandalous gossip from within S.W.F.C, if the driver was a Wednesday player.

 

Soon after I woke up, Kenny Burton was dropped off somewhere near half way up Prince of Wales Road (I just knew it). I was dropped off at that school on the left at Manor Top. The driver spoke to me for the first time by saying, “Goodnight son.” Then he drove around the roundabout and went down City Road. I got home 20 minutes later at Crossland Drive. Thanks Mr Burton you saved my life. Me mum woulda killed me.

 

If anybody knows Kenny Burton please ask him who drove him to and from the Jackie Bestall Testimonial Match, and report back ASAP. The driver could have been a Wednesday player. If it was, it certainly wasn’t David Ford.

 

Zakes.

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I was standing outside Hillsboro' after a match near the players entrance when a young fan came over and asked me for my autograph. I told him that I wasn't a player and he said "It doesn't matter I collect anybodies". Nough said!!

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Collecting Autographs 6.

 

9. Paddy Buckley.

 

It wasn’t long after I’d started collecting autographs of footballers, when my schoolmate Len and me were at United’s training ground behind the Ball Inn at Lower Arbourthorne. We had wagged it from school (Hurlfield) and we were both excited about the prospect of getting loads of autographs. I had never played truant at my previous schools so this was all new to me and I felt reight nervous about it.

 

I don’t know how we two found out, but after training was finished the players would be going to the ground at Bramall Lane. Whether it was for a team talk on tactics or whether there was a gym at the Lane I didn’t know. At the time I was only collecting signatures in an exercise book but Len had annuals and pics cut out of knocked off football magazines. We decided to get more autographs at the Lane and so we tried to cadge a lift down.

 

Our attempt to cadge a lift was successful and we would be very soon travelling down to Bramall Lane in a red coloured Morris 1100 (?) The seating was also in red. The driver would be Patrick Buckley and sat next to him would be Anthony Currie, with Len and me in the back. On arrival in John Street we all got out, the two players went into the ground, and we lads stayed outside. We did get some more signatures then got fed up of waiting and decided to go home. At the 51 bus stop on Charlotte Road Len was in panic because he couldn’t find his house key. He searched his pockets but to no avail, we both came to the conclusion it was in Mr Buckley’s car.

 

We went back to John Street to look through the windows of the car but we couldn’t see Len’s key. We waited for ages and eventually Paddy Buckley came out as did the other players to go home. The car interior was thoroughly searched and the key wasn’t found.

Paddy then asked Len if it was so important for him to have the key (daft question), Len replied yes because he wouldn’t be able to get in when he got home, because his mum was at work (Bernie Inn, Exchange St.) and she’d kill him later.

We drove back to the Ball Inn ground and the key was soon found. We gave our thanks to Paddy and said our goodbyes and my last memory of that day was the large dust cloud created by Paddy Buckley’s spinning car wheels.

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Collecting Autographs 7.

 

10. Lew Clayton.

 

Mr Clayton was trainer of Cardiff City, the Bluebirds of Ninian Park.

I had seen him in previous seasons when Cardiff had stayed at the Grand Hotel on Balm Green next to the City Hall. I always found the Cardiff players to be friendly and loved collecting their signatures. My favourite personalities were Don Murray, Mel Sutton and Jim Scoular the manager who was a big rugged bloke, but with kind eyes.

 

On this occasion it was 1973 outside the Grosvenor House Hotel, when Mr Clayton asked me to do him a favour as he didn’t know his way around Sheffield. I agreed to his request and took the one pound note he proffered. He wanted for me to get him a record that had recently stormed the charts. ‘Tie a yellow ribbon round the old oak tree’ by Tony Orlando and Dawn, was the title.

 

I went to Bradley’s, Canns and Wilson Peck’s but each shop had sold out and were waiting to be re-stocked. I went back to the Grosvenor Hotel red faced and breathless. Some time later Mr Clayton came out again and I gave him his quid note back along with the bad news about the record. He stuck the pound in his wallet gave me a ten bob bit and said:-

“Thankyou for trying anyway.”

 

Mr Clayton wasn’t just a trainer, he also coached and did physio. He played a big part when Cardiff City were very successful in Europe toward the end of the 60’s. People like him deserved better recognition than they got.

 

Some other ‘trainers’ who were worthy in my time as a autograph hunter were:-

 

John Mortimer – Southampton – under Ted Bates

Ken Fish – Oxford – under Arthur Turner

Harry Med Hurst – Chelsea – under Dave Sexton

Jack Blackman – Millwall – under Benny Fenton

Pat Malloy – Watford – under Ken Furphy

Harry Hubbick – Preston – under Alan Ball Snr.

Jimmy Gordon – Derby – under Brian Clough

 

The list is almost endless. Good loyal people.

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Did go down south to get Attila The Huns Auto but he was on his way to sacking Rome so he was to busy, well thats the way I remember it??

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Collecting Autographs 8.

 

I started to collect autographs when I was in my 14th year in 1968. I stopped collecting at the end of 74-75 season when I was 21. I had set my heart on wanting to hitch hike around the world and nothing was gonna stop me. I had started collecting autographs because it was something to do, and I enjoyed the idea of meeting the stars. The autographs were of footballers, and cricketers in the summer. In 1969 I left Hurlfield School and started to work. I had tried to pack up autographing but it was difficult because the hobby had become an addiction. I tried not to take jobs that included Saturday, if I did I didn’t stay long. I made more dosh working overtime during the week as there was plenty of overtime to be had in the late 60’s, early 70’s. This extra money paid for boozing, birds, fags and autograph stuff, like annuals and magazines. I learned some tricks from 2 other autographs’ hunters who had been at it a while longer than me. I was a willing learner and it wasn’t long before I was a dab hand at it. A proper PRO. Lol.

 

One of the first things I learned was how to get in to matches without paying. Every ground (I think) in the country had an area where supporters (usually older ones) had a medallion or pass or keyring permitting them to take a guest or two with them into the ground. Were these people shareholders? At Wednesay it took me into the stand on the same side but higher up from the players entrance. At United it took me into the Terracing on John Street. There may have been other areas I didn’t know of.

 

I (sometimes we) would stand at the appropriate gate (turnstile) and say “Take one in Mister?” It usually took no longer than ten minutes before one of these generous men said, “Alright son.” We never stayed with the person at the match, and neither did they expect us to. Just a nice gesture.

I don’t wish to extend this part too long suffice to say I stayed in the stand at Hillsboro’. At the lane I often climbed over the railing into the Away end then walk around the Pavilion to the Kop end. It was because I loved the smell of Bovril and Parkie’s. Lol.

 

---------- Post added 21-05-2013 at 05:28 ----------

 

Collecting Autographs 9.

 

Bunking it.

 

The football annuals and mags contained loads of photos which we obviously wanted signing. Both Sheffield clubs couldn’t possibly be in all 4 divisions at the same time which meant during the season many clubs wouldn’t be visiting Sheffield. That meant we had to travel to other towns and cities for signatures, usually by train for FREE (bunking it).

 

When I first started collecting autographs the lads who had been at it longer than me showed me the ropes, which they no doubt had learned from others. Although you may think it to be impossible, I can assure you I never paid for a train journey in almost 8 years of collecting autographs. Most of us respected our working class background, and for that reason we never took advantage of the situation by travelling first class. I (we) would be collecting autographs on Friday evenings, Saturday mornings and evenings and often on Tuesday and Wednesday evenings. It seems the ticket inspectors of British Rail (BR) in those days perhaps had instructions on when to check tickets. E.G. 1, the journey from Sheffield to London. The inspector always checked tickets after Leicester. E.G. 2, the journey from London back to Sheffield the inspector always checked tickets after Leicester. This is only an assumption because in all the many times I’d travelled to Leicester and back I never once saw a ticket inspector. More about dodging ticket inspectors in a later post.

 

Saturday evenings was the busiest time for us when teams would be going home having played away. If a team had won we would get loads of ‘graphs’, if a team had lost then it was difficult to get many signatures, which made it into a challenge which I relished, because it gave me the chance to play mind games with the difficult players like :-

 

John Radford – Arsenal

Eamomn Dunphy – Millwall

Martin Chivers – Spurs

Paul Reaney – Leeds

Brian Dear – WHU

Peter Bradbrook – WHU

Terry Paine – Southampton

Gordon Banks – Stoke

Gordon Harris – Sunderland

John Ritchie – Stoke

Emlyn Hughes – Liverpool

And others. More about mind games in a later post.

 

Regardless of win or lose many footballers travelling long distances by train would be quite boozed up, and usually playing in card schools. In late 1968 one lad and me made the big mistake of travelling from Doncaster to York with the Sunderland team after they had been hammered at West Ham 8-0. Geoff Hurst had scored 6 goals, a hat-trick in each half. He later admitted to hand ball for the first goal (Francis Lee at Man City also did a similar thing (handball) away at Spurs on another occasion). Martin Harvey, Ian Porterfield and Charley Hurley signed for us but the others wouldn’t. We even got shouted at by Gordon Harris (ex-Burnley) who was my bogey player (I autographed at Burnley).

The evening had started okay because we had earlier travelled down from York to Donny with QPR and Fulham (on the same train) who had played at Newcastle and Middlesbrough respectively.

If we were travelling by train on Saturdays our regular journeys would often be:-

 

1. Sheffield to York, to travel to Doncaster or sometimes Retford with Southern teams returning from the North East. We would then wait at Donny or Retford for North Eastern teams returning from London (if any played that day) or…

2. Sheffield to Doncaster, then wait to travel with N.E. teams to York. This depended on whether any Southern clubs were playing in Sheffield that day. These clubs would generally travel to Sheffield by train Friday evenings arriving on platform one and stay either in, Hallam Towers, Grand Hotel, Grosvenor or Royal Victoria Hotel. After the match they would catch the 18:00 train on platform 6 to return home. It was all about timing, we couldn’t fly you know. If a Southern team was in Sheffield and we needed the ‘graphs’ then it wouldn’t be possible to get to York in time to catch the southern teams coming back from the North East. This means option 2 would come into play, then we’d travel with the southern team(s) from Donny to Retford. We would then wait at Retford Station for North Eastern teams to return and we would board the train and travel to York with them (but sometimes Doncaster), Simple. We tried to keep away from small stations like Retford and Wakefield Westgate because there was never big crowds of people to mingle with, making it possible for a rail worker to nab us having got off a train. Masses of people were of great import for us, to hide behind.

 

To confuse the issue further, Leeds United would arrive at Doncaster about 20:00 on the Yorkshire Pullman if they had played in London. If Leeds were home to a Southern team, then we would travel with them (Southern team) from Leeds to Doncaster or Retford or from Wakefield Westgate to Doncaster or Retford depending on how many ‘graphs’ we needed. The more you need, the longer the train journey you need. Simple. More about Leeds on later post.

 

Anyway, we’d be done for the day about 21:00 usually in York. From York we would catch the ‘mail train’ at 21:25 to be back in Sheffield at 22:38. This train didn’t take the usual route but went through Pontefract and other lost places along the way. It was like being on a ghost train because we seemed to be the only passengers on board. The only money we spent was on cups of tea or cans of pop at railway stations whilst waiting in all weathers for trains to arrive. British Rail sandwiches and mini pork pies were also available to lads with long sticky fingers.

 

At each new station we went to we always nipped out of the Royal Mail or National Carriers (BR) gateways. If this wasn’t possible we’d walk to the platform’s end and walk down the lines until we found a gap or scaled a wall or fence. We would then return to the station and buy a platform ticket to get us off the station at any future date. We were always casual in our way and easily passed for local trainspotters. Some of us had quite large collections of platform tickets at home.

 

We travelled to other places too, but I can see you’ve had enough for today. Lol.

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COLLECTING AUTOGRAPHS 10.

 

 

7 teams.

 

"OH! Dr Beeching, What have you done?

There once were lots of trains to catch,

But soon there will be none!

I'll have to buy a bike,

'cause I can't afford a car,

OH! Dr Beeching!

What a naughty man you are!"

 

The date Saturday 27th December 1969. Time 08:40 approx.

 

4 autograph collectors (grapher's) meet up on platform 6 at Sheffield Midland Station, Rick, Maurice, Len and Zakes. This was going to be one of the most successful days ever for us, because 3 of us would be getting signatures of 7 teams on this cold day, and one lad would get 6 teams. It would take us over 12 hours to achieve this. We had spent days getting our magazine cuttings and annuals prepared for this day, and we were champing at the bit.

 

Rick was the one who knew about when inspectors checked tickets, and he assured us we cold sit back and relax today. He turned out to be right apart from one slight hiccup later on. This game of cat and mouse was a continuation of my earlier years on Hackenthorpe, Birley, Frecheville and Gleadless Townend with local bobby's and school teachers, now it was the turn of British Rail officials and hotel porters.

 

The teams of the day would be: Notts Forest, Leicester, Millwall, Derby, West Brom, Orient and finally Newcastle Utd.

 

Our train journey would be as follows:

 

Sheffield to Leicester (via Nottingham)

Leicester to Derby

Derby to Sheffield

Sheffield to Doncaster

Doncaster to York

York to Sheffield. Start 09:00- Finish 22:40 approx.

 

The train pulled into platform 6 at 08:50 and the first thing to do was to check for the white oblong stickers stuck to the windows. The found stickers confirmed that Notts Forest had reserved compartments, and would be travelling on this train from Nottingham to London, where they would be playing against West Ham. The next thing to check (if possible) was where the ticket inspector (not guard) was situated. Will be detailed in a later post.

 

At Nottingham, the Forest players boarded. We gave them 5 minutes to settle then we pulled out our folders and annuals. We were busy with one lad to a compartment then swapping over 'til we had all done the compartments. We didn't have a "difficult" player, with all of them willing to sign our stuff. Amongst them were: J. Winfield, B. McKinlay, B. Lyons, L. O'kane, H. Newton, R. Rees, S. Chapman etc.

 

We alit at Leicester feeling we had done well. Maurice hadn't got a Leicester platform ticket in his collection, but that was soon remedied. Us other 3 handed in our platform tickets at the barrier, but not as a group. I then bought 2 platform tickets from the machine (2 old pence each) and went back onto the platform in a casual way. A short while later Maurice and I had handed our platform tickets in too. We easily passed as trainspotters.

 

At Filbert Street we got autographs of Leicester players coming to the ground, amongst them were: P. Shilton, L. Glover, A. Clarke, A. Woollet, G. Cross, D. Nish, D. Gibson etc.

 

You may find this next part hard to believe, but I promise you it is true.

 

The Millwall coach arrived at the ground and we 4 got loads of "graphs". It was always easy to get Millwall signatures because the players never rushed into the stadium. They always hung around and had a good chat with their fans before going in. In my 8ish years of collecting "graphs", I had never seen such a rapport atween a team and it's fans like with Millwall. I have witnessed this on 5 occasions at least, it must be seen to be believed.

 

The big surprise was when at least a dozen of these fans led by a lad called Keith Locker, came over to me and spoke my name. They shook hands with me and asked me if I was well. I was fully overcome with this attention. The rogue's gallery and the Krays were nothing compared to these lads.... well almost. LOL. I had met these lads almost 2 months prior in Huddersfield, in a strange situation. At a later date I will explain to you how I knew them. I will also tell you of my other Millwall experiences including a lift to Hills'boro from the Royal 'Vic' Hotel with the team in October 1973, an evening match. If I had to support a London team it would be Millwall, without doubt. Millwall players included: B. King, B. Kitchener, H. Cripps, D. Possee, D. Burnett, E. Dunphy etc

 

Having calmed down having again met the Lions fans, we 4 went with the help of "shareholders" (them with medallions) into the ground. We watched the game for 15 minutes or so, then it was time to go, to Derby.

 

At Leicester Station 4 platform tickets were purchased and without 15 minutes or so we were on a train Derby bound. We arrived at the Baseball Ground in time to see the last 10 - 15 minutes of play. After the match we went to the players entrance to get the "graphs" of the Derby and West Brom players. We didn't get as many "graphs" as we would have liked, but some you win and some you lose. Players who signed were: Derby - J. O'Hare, L. Green, D. Mackay, A. Durban etc. WBA - D. Fraser, J. kaye, J. Talbot, C. Clark, T. Brown etc.

 

We made our way to Derby Station, and didn't have long to wait before the Orient team arrived to catch their train back to London. They had come by coach from Mansfield where they had been stagnated by the rampant Stags. They were friendly though and granted us our wishes. Players there were: T. Mancini, D. Rofe, M. Lazarus, D. Plumb, P. Allan, M. Bullock etc.

 

Not too long after Orient left, we 4 went for our train back to Sheffield. It was on this journey we almost become unstuck. We somehow had got it stuck in our head we were on a London to Sheffield train. We were in fact on a train that came from Devon/ Cornwall or Wales, we had never taken this train before and we were almost caught off guard. Due to our always keeping the compartment door open (to listen for ticket inspectors) we heard further down the corridor somebody loudly saying "tickets please" (thanks for the warning mate). We were mortified. We left the compartment and went along the train away from the voice. We were heading for a toilet where us 4 would hide together, but with the lock showing vacant from the outside. We needn't of worried though, because the train started to slow, and two minutes later it stopped at Chesterfield. We jumped off the train and slowly walked down the platform to the end of the train where the inspector had already checked. It had been a close call and we were much relieved when we arrived in Sheffield. We had done this walking back along the platform thing before, but not in such a panic as this time, phew!

 

At Sheffield Rick decided to go home, leaving Maurice, Len and myself to catch the train up to Doncaster. At Doncaster we got the Green 'Un and studied the results, then soon the Eastern Line train from Kings Cross pulled in.We saw the white oblong stickers which confirmed Newcastle Utd were on board. The train set off and we found some players reclining in compartments, and we found others in the restaurant card somewhat sozzled. The players were good to us after their draw at Arsenal and we had some good conversation with them. Joe Harvey the manager was really intrigued with our story of the day (all what I've told you) and we had a good laugh about it. he or his coach Dave Smith? (ex Owls coach - 1966) bought us three a can of pop each plus a wafer biscuit. Newcastle players including: A. Burton, D. Elliott, G. Marshall, W. Davies, B. Robson, T. Robson etc. We met Lord Westwood the Newcastle chairman too. Moshe Dayan's double. LOL.

 

We detrained at York Station and caught the "mail" train at 21:25 back to Sheffield, arrival time 22:35ish

 

Results that day:

Leicester 1 Millwall 1

WHU 1 Notts Forest 1

Arsenal 0 Newcastle 0

Derby 2 WBA 0

Mansfield 4 Orient 1

 

Stick that in your report Dr. Beeching, trunt!

 

---------- Post added 03-10-2014 at 09:37 ----------

 

Collecting Autographs 11.

 

It was always sensible to have 3 graphers together, because that way you can hold up the players. If a grapher is on his own and 4 players arrive on the scene having been in a hotel, sarsaparilla bar or perhaps a bordello, you can ask one of them to sign your pics. You can't realistically ask them all to sign because they wouldn't be prepared to form an orderly queue. With these players being in a group, they would find it easy to refuse you and perhaps tell you to bog off.

 

If 3 graphers would have been in the situation described above, then each one of them could have tackled a player apiece. As most of us know, the British have the herd mentality, which means the fourth player wouldn't have strayed away. It is guaranteed he would have waited nearby, safety in numbers. When one of the graphers is finished getting signatures from one of the original 3, he can then turn to the fourth man and bring him into play, by asking him to sign. Seconds afterwards, one of the other grapher's could then switch to the now spare player for him to sign. If the graphers have rehearsed properly and don't start to get hectically giddy, they can calmly keep rotating until all their pics have been signed.Simple. If you are worried a player might escape by walking off, you must try to engage him in conversation. There are a vast amount of things you could talk about, but my favourites always worked for me :

 

1. How is your garden coming on this year?

2.Do you know about the principle of a barometer?

3. How many beans make five?

4. Did you know that your club is about to sell you?

 

This should confuse him enough to keep him onside and glued to the spot. Job done. It is of the utmost importance to be friendly and polite at all times. Never ever give the impression that you know that most footballers are thick overgrown schoolboys, who belong in a borstal. Steve Heighway, Brian Hall, Steve Coppell and Chris Galvin were also overgrown schoolboys, but they certainly weren't thick. They all had degrees, when degrees meant something.

 

There isn't always harmony among autograph collectors though, because they all have ambition, and will try to get more signatures than the others. It was the same with me, I had my little tricks too. Having become the main [and best] grapher in Yorkshire and the East Midlands, it was important to impress upon my underlings that I was far better than them. Given time they would learn these tricks to become better themselves, and eventually take up the mantle when I packed up graphing altogether. I genuinely believe [know] these boys looked to me for the lead.

 

When Brighton, Southampton, Portsmouth or the London clubs played in Sheffield, they'd come up on Friday evening, usually by rail. We graphers would be usually waiting for the train to arrive at platform 1 but sometimes platform 2 or 5 at 20:00ish. This is about autographs and not the Master Cutler, so I'll give that a miss. The players who carried their own personal sports bag were quite reluctant to put them down to sign for us. This meant we didn't get a great deal of autographs at the station on Friday neets.

 

The trains from London to Sheffield would call at Leicester, Nottingham, Chesterfield then Sheffield. The next train [1 hour later] would call at Derby instead of Nottingham, and the next one through Nottingham etc. They always called at Leicester and Chesterfield.

 

 

The other graphers tended to be happy getting a few autographs, but I wasn't. Having spent many hours during the week sorting out pics, annuals and folders I expected to get everything signed. Reality says it's not possible to get everything signed but I was determined to give it a good go. If I had 12 pics of a player, I would want them all to be signed, and wouldn't be satisfied if only 3-4 were signed.

 

 

One Friday in the early 70's I bunked it on the train down to Derby without telling the other graphers, and arrived there about 18:00ish. I didn't have to wait long and caught the train back up to Sheffield with the Arsenal team on board...at my mercy. I got loads of stuff signed and the only difficult player was John Radford, which wasn't a surprise. Radford always seemed to be a misery guts, and he didn't sign this time either. I was determined to get Radford signed this time and I wasn't gonna give up on this poker faced barm cake who originated from Pontefract. I could try again on platform 1 in Sheffield or at the Hallam Towers Hotel tomorrow (Sat) morning or afternoon when they set off to Bramall Lane. My last chance would be at Midland Station when Arsenal go back to London at 18:00 from platform 6.

 

After having a nice natter with Bob McNab and some other players I alit the train at Sheffield. The other graphers were surprised to see me (must of wondered where I had got to) as they were running about the platform like headless hens trying to get a graph or two. I knew the Arsenal coach (bus) wouldn't be setting off straight away because the king sized hamper basket with the Arsenal kit in it had to be retrieved from the guard's van. This gave me the opportunity, which I took to zip over the main road opposite the stationto catch the Nr. 60 bus up to the hotel.

 

I was stood directly at the front entrance of the hotel when the Arsenal coach arrived. Although I had still a few pics of others to sign I was only interested in collaring John ruddy Radford. I was going to badger him and I didn't care if he lamped me one or not. I'd met po faced bad tempered footballers before. I need'nt have worried though because when he got off the coach then saw me I saw the surprised look on his face, followed by a very faint quick smile. I had been preparing myself for the "please sir, just one please", begging thing but he came over to me and dropped his bag on the steps and said (something like) "you don't give up easily, do you?", he signed me 4 or 5 of me 15 pics or so then walked off (not smiling). I thought to myself, "thanks pal, you can sign me the rest tomorrow."

 

Other players there were:- P. Marinello, G. Graham, P. Storey, P. Rice etc

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Collecting Autographs 12.

 

Hotels.

 

If team Z is coming to Sheffield and you would like to get their autographs, you will need to know at which hotel they would be staying. This means you may have to refer to the Yellow Pages telephone directory to obtain the contact numbers of hotels. Once you have written out a list of likely hotel numbers, you will have to make calls to these hotels, because if you don't, you will most likely not find out where the team is staying.

 

Dial [or type in] the number of the first hotel on your list, and when the mini skirted receptionist eventually responds to the ringtone and says, "Hotel X, what's tha' bleedin' well want?" You must NOT say, "Is team Z stopping at your hotel?" The hotel will not wish to have uninvited guests [autograph hunters included], so the receptionist will respond by saying either.

 

a. We cannot issue information about guests

b. No

c. What's it gorra do wi' thee?

 

What you MUST say is,. "At what time will team Z be arriving?" or "Has team Z arrived yet?"

 

This last example will make it sound a foregone conclusion, that you know team Z will be residing at hotel X. The mini skirted receptionist will then either say :

 

a. Yes, they have arrived

b. They will be arriving soon [later]

c. No, they are not staying at this hotel.

 

If the receptionist with the sexy pins utters [or mumbles] option c, then you must cut the call short by hanging up, because you now have the bad news, and further talking will only cost you more money.

Beware! the receptionist with the tight tail piece may be an habitchual liar!

 

If you are a child, you will have a child's voice. Hotel receptionists will then tell you the team isn't staying at that hotel, because they will suspect you to be a 'grapher', and 'graphers' are seen as pesky pests. Try to speak in a deep voice or ask your Dad, uncle or big brother to make the call for you.

 

Now try the second number on your list...

 

---------- Post added 03-10-2014 at 09:59 ----------

 

Collecting Autographs 13

 

1) Continuing from last time [collecting autographs 12]. If you didn't ascertain where team Z were staying after going through your list of hotel telephone numbers, you would have had another chance to have found out.

 

By going to the hotels in person and checking the car park to see if a coach [charabanc] is parked there. 10:00 to 13:00, Saturday morning.

 

If you failed to find the team, you will need to know for the next time team Z plays [stays] in Sheffield.

Go to the to the football ground, and whilst a player is signing for you [someone will sign], ask him where they had stayed. Do this quietly and secretly, because you don't want other's to hear. When the player gives you the info you require, keep it to yourself. Store it in your head for the next time. If a team have travelled by train, always ask when the train arrived,questions bring answers. The more info you have, the more successful you will be, then in years to come, you can tell everybody including your grandchildren, how you were nearly as good as Zakes at 'graphing'. The info you glean will put you in good stead for the next season.

 

Always be pally with the coach driver. They have bags of information as to the movement of football teams. As a sweetener, offer the driver a Mint Imperial or a Butter Dainty, they are suckers for them, and will give you all the info you need. It worked for me, it will work for you. Guaranteed.

 

Every Saturday evening when you get home, you must write down on paper what you have learned on that day. You will learn more as each week goes by, about the arrivals and departures of teams at hotels and railway stations. Just be pleased Sheffield doesn't have an airport, sea port or a hover port, because that would confuse the issue somewhat.

 

 

2. During my 8 years of 'graphing' I made at least 2 train journeys [there and back] most Saturday's. I didn't pay for my train travels as I said before, but I didn't have feelings of guilt about this. The situation is this....If a train journeyed from A to B and it had empty seats, it wouldn't make any difference if I was to sit in one of the seats,or not. Nobody from British Rail would know I was there, so no one could say I was defrauding, thieving or whatever. In fact, it would be a win, win situation for BR and for me :

 

1. I would have free travel

2. BR would have someone [me] testing their security and also testing their seats forcomfortableness. They don't charge me, I don't charge them. Everybody happy.

3.I couldn't be blamed for fare increases, because nobody from BR knew I was travelling or had travelled for free. No loss to them. Fare increases stem from pure unadulterated greed.

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Zakes this is one of the best posts I have read. You should have it all made into a film.

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Zakes this is one of the best posts I have read. You should have it all made into a film.

Who would take the lead part.

Edited by dafodil

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