People I’d like to thump

Luckily for them and me

they’re mostly faces on TV:

spouting politicians,

over-hyped musicians,

the unfamiliar name

with mystifying fame,

some new bizarre

reality star,

those patronising wily brains

behind annoying ad campaigns.

I like to think that all of those

deserve a boffing on the nose.

Whilst some deserve a seeing to

for what they say or what they do,

I sometimes spot a special case

who simply has…. That Sort of Face

- a soppy, smug or blameless air

or a hipster dude with stupid hair.

Though clearly they’ve done nothing wrong

the urge to thwack is still as strong.

This shameful urge exists in me

I can’t explain why this should be.

For such a deed would bring disgrace.

And they can’t help their silly face.

I know I’m just a testy grump

but these are who I’d like to thump.

Also, anyone on a unicycle.

Well done Sir Nigel. Same sharp humour and inimitable style

Brilliant, made me laugh.