I note with interest that our not so beloved Executive Director of Children's Services, Dr Sonia Sharp is off to Australia to champion anti bullying:

http://www.ncab.org.au/Assets/Files/Fact%20Sheet_NCAB_Conference%202012_FINAL[1].pdf

I am delighted she is leaving the city but I am concerned for the children of Australia. I am unsure why Dr Sharp is considered a world expert in the field of anti bullying. I have two teenagers and my experience is that bullying is common in Sheffield schools. There have been some well publicised incidents in the past. Not only does it seem to be common but it's a problem that many schools ignore. Having a bullying problem is seen as a badge of shame in the profession so it is covered up as much as possible. Dr Sharp appears to be instrumental in the covering up.

I know there are many parents and education professionals on this forum so I would be interested to hear views and experiences. I have looked through some previous threads and there is some evidence that bullying is a problem in some schools. The last thread deteriorated into a comparison of performance tables so let's try and avoid that.

I am not so interested in how to deal with it. I've been through all that myself. I am more interested in finding out if my experience is rare or not. You don't have to name schools just say if you have a problem or not. From the professionals is there any evidence Sonia Sharp has had any beneficial effect in reducing bullying?

I would say every school in the country has some bullying ...the degree of which will vary.

Well, if Sonia is better at anti-bullying, than you are at posting links, that would be a good start!

I was bullied in school, only by the same people because our 'groups' didn't get along. But the teachers would be the first to try and cover it up and tell me I was lying about it..

Example, we used to sit in name order in one class which put me next to someone I really didn't get along with as they used to constantly say stuff to me. I told the teacher this, and she told me to sit there anyway and she would 'monitor' it, now, most of the lesson she ignored it happening until I got upset and walked out, at which point she moved me.

Then, in another lesson a teacher would laugh when one girl used to shout names and verbal abuse at other girls in the class.. She was on tv the other year on a BBC Three programme discussing teaching problem children. It was very annoying to watch knowing how crap she was.

I've got to say at least half my teachers were aware that people were bullying and being bullied, and just chose to ignore it.

I also don't know many people who weren't bullied, from different schools and I think they all had the same experiences as me.

I've got to say though, I'm soooo glad I was bullied, it's made me such a strong person now and there's no way I'd put up with what I did then.

I think the only teachers who are good at dealing with bullying, are the ones who have been bullied.

Oh, and I left school 7ish years ago. It has got worse from what I know.

I was bullied in school, only by the same people because our 'groups' didn't get along. But the teachers would be the first to try and cover it up and tell me I was lying about it..

Example, we used to sit in name order in one class which put me next to someone I really didn't get along with as they used to constantly say stuff to me. I told the teacher this, and she told me to sit there anyway and she would 'monitor' it, now, most of the lesson she ignored it happening until I got upset and walked out, at which point she moved me.

Then, in another lesson a teacher would laugh when one girl used to shout names and verbal abuse at other girls in the class.. She was on tv the other year on a BBC Three programme discussing teaching problem children. It was very annoying to watch knowing how crap she was.

I've got to say at least half my teachers were aware that people were bullying and being bullied, and just chose to ignore it.

I also don't know many people who weren't bullied, from different schools and I think they all had the same experiences as me.

I've got to say though, I'm soooo glad I was bullied, it's made me such a strong person now and there's no way I'd put up with what I did then.

I think the only teachers who are good at dealing with bullying, are the ones who have been bullied.

Oh, and I left school 7ish years ago. It has got worse from what I know.

Teachers expect people to deal with bullies themselves,and learn a little autonomy rather than become dependent.Given you are now such a strong person as a result, is bullying a character-building experience?Perhaps you should applaud those teachers who let you work out your own solution rather than condemn them in their absence.:)

I would say every school in the country has some bullying ...the degree of which will vary.

Any school which claims to have eradicated bullying is either foolish or dishonest and probably both.

Any school which claims to have eradicated bullying is either foolish or dishonest and probably both.

Agree completely.

http://www.ncab.org.au/Assets/Files/Fact%20Sheet_NCAB_Conference%202012_FINAL%5B6%5D.p df

Teachers expect people to deal with bullies themselves,and learn a little autonomy rather than become dependent.Given you are now such a strong person as a result, is bullying a character-building experience?Perhaps you should applaud those teachers who let you work out your own solution rather than condemn them in their absence.:)

Hmm, I suppose. I do believe that there is a limit though, and it was ignored on more than one occasion. I did say in my post that its made me a stronger person, much more than people who I know who weren't bullied but I would have liked an easier school experience in general.

The teacher who has recently been on tv was a horrible person in general though, and I do not think she should be a teacher. I just never went to her lessons after a while.

I also think I could have done a lot better in school if I hadn't been bullied. The only lesson I ever enjoyed and did well in was english and that was purely because I could get on with it and there was nobody in that class who said stuff.

Teachers expect people to deal with bullies themselves,and learn a little autonomy rather than become dependent.Given you are now such a strong person as a result, is bullying a character-building experience?Perhaps you should applaud those teachers who let you work out your own solution rather than condemn them in their absence.:)

This is something very important and personal to me, and sorry to say that I couldn't disagree more.

According to my Mum I started school as a happy, cheerful and confident child, who laughed and sang all of the time. Due to the constant bullying from Junior school up I left school as a painfully shy (to the extent that I physically could not speak to people other than my family) closed down, depressed person, with no confidence or self esteem, all that was left was a fear of people and agonising self doubt.

Far from finding bullying to be character building it destroyed mine, it also set me up for years of being a "yes" person, afraid to show any personality and relationship abuse.

The teachers at the school where I went I hold responsible for so much of my misery, I was bullied by children then as I began to close myself off from the world I was ridiculed/ignored/laughed at by the teachers, which obviously the kids loved and there I was helpless and fair game for all, and what a brilliant game it was for all of them. Then I discovered the joys of running away from school which initially got me physically dragged back crying from my home by a member of school staff, later I made sure that wouldn't happen by running off further afield where of course I was then in real danger.

My one saving grace which I am forever so so grateful was a personal development course provided by a charity called Scoop aid when I became a single parent, it gave me the tools that I needed and the "clear sight" to know where I had been, where I was going and what I needed to do to imrove myself and my life, so in my 40's I became a real person, a person that dared to have personality, say no and to deal with issues in my life...thank God for Scoop aid that scared little girl is gone, and I am now a happy and confident Human being.

We give schools our precious children, how dare they allow them to be damaged and sit back doing nothing, or laugh at the child thus enforcing that it is the childs own fault in some way? we are allowing these people the care of our precious children, our future...we need to make sure that they are up to the job,and if they are not we need to know why and that things are going to change.

Sorry that got a bit longer than I intended but anyway... :hihi:

This is something very important and personal to me, and sorry to say that I couldn't disagree more.

According to my Mum I started school as a happy, cheerful and confident child, who laughed and sang all of the time. Due to the constant bullying from Junior school up I left school as a painfully shy (to the extent that I physically could not speak to people other than my family) closed down, depressed person, with no confidence or self esteem, all that was left was a fear of people and agonising self doubt.

Far from finding bullying to be character building it destroyed mine, it also set me up for years of being a "yes" person, afraid to show any personality and relationship abuse.

The teachers at the school where I went I hold responsible for so much of my misery, I was bullied by children then as I began to close myself off from the world I was ridiculed/ignored/laughed at by the teachers, which obviously the kids loved and there I was helpless and fair game for all, and what a brilliant game it was for all of them. Then I discovered the joys of running away from school which initially got me physically dragged back crying from my home by a member of school staff, later I made sure that wouldn't happen by running off further afield where of course I was then in real danger.

My one saving grace which I am forever so so grateful was a personal development course provided by a charity called Scoop aid when I became a single parent, it gave me the tools that I needed and the "clear sight" to know where I had been, where I was going and what I needed to do to imrove myself and my life, so in my 40's I became a real person, a person that dared to have personality, say no and to deal with issues in my life...thank God for Scoop aid that scared little girl is gone, and I am now a happy and confident Human being.

We give schools our precious children, how dare they allow them to be damaged and sit back doing nothing, or laugh at the child thus enforcing that it is the childs own fault in some way? we are allowing these people the care of our precious children, our future...we need to make sure that they are up to the job,and if they are not we need to know why and that things are going to change.

Sorry that got a bit longer than I intended but anyway... :hihi:

I was questioning the suggestion that bullying is character-building;it is likely to erode rather than develop resilience.However the bullied person,and their parents need to develop a strategy to combat this behaviour and avoid a victim mentality.You have been highly critical of your teachers.Did your mother approach the school with your observations,and if so what happened?

I was questioning the suggestion that bullying is character-building;it is likely to erode rather than develop resilience.However the bullied person,and their parents need to develop a strategy to combat this behaviour and avoid a victim mentality.You have been highly critical of your teachers.Did your mother approach the school with your observations,and if so what happened?

If you mean you was questioning me on it being character building, I am aware that for many it can make you back off from situations in life and be much less confident. But fortunately, after years of this being the case for me I ended up surrounded by people who pretty much forced me to confront the bullies and learn not to let them walk all over me. Also, I think I changed a few years before I left school, I got the chance to stand up to people that could have otherwise have affected me for the rest of my life.

Also, my parents contacted the school numerous times, which got us nowhere, I ended up being put in a room with other pupils who were destructive during classes went and one of the helpers then decided to point out infront of everyone why I was there. I can assure you that teachers are to blame for a lot of bullying and infact do a lot of the bullying on occasion.

It actually took me accidentally doing something quite drastic for people to stop saying things to me. Don't get me wrong, I feel bad that it happened and would never do it on purpose but I suppose that person just got bit on the ass by karma. I'm also not going to go into that was.

I do want to say that some teachers were lovely, and really helped and understood and didn't point it out and make it obvious like some did. So that's amazing of them.

I am also thankful that it happened because I'm now hyper aware of bullying, which means I can tell when people need to talk or just sit and be quiet. I'm aware of others feelings all the time too. I'm also completely intolerant of any form of bullying, and will stick up for anyone.

If you mean you was questioning me on it being character building, I am aware that for many it can make you back off from situations in life and be much less confident. But fortunately, after years of this being the case for me I ended up surrounded by people who pretty much forced me to confront the bullies and learn not to let them walk all over me. Also, I think I changed a few years before I left school, I got the chance to stand up to people that could have otherwise have affected me for the rest of my life.

Also, my parents contacted the school numerous times, which got us nowhere, I ended up being put in a room with other pupils who were destructive during classes went and one of the helpers then decided to point out infront of everyone why I was there. I can assure you that teachers are to blame for a lot of bullying.

It actually took me accidentally doing something quite drastic for people to stop saying things to me. Don't get me wrong, I feel bad that it happened and would never do it on purpose but I suppose that person just got bit in the ass by karma. I'm also not going to go into that was.

Was Karma in your class -she sounds a right handful?Why did your parents not contact an external agency,the governors,the local councillor or an MP?

Was Karma in your class -she sounds a right handful?Why did your parents not contact an external agency,the governors,the local councillor or an MP?

:hihi: hmm.

I don't think I'd have wanted them to, I just wanted to hide most of the time and forget it was happening. It was bad enough when they contacted the head of year etc.

I also think it's weird how both Moonbird and myself have had experience of teachers bullying.

At school, it was a nightmare.

When I look back on it, if I got it now i'd burst out laughing at some of it.

And yes, I've come across one or two heads who have declared there is no bullying in their school.

It's so sad to read your posts moonbird and nataliie.

Bullying is awful and has driven people of all ages to self harm or suicide! I think everyone has suffered from bullying of some sort and to a degree, it is character building. but there is very soon a point where it should be dealt with before it starts to cause permanent damage to the victim.

Serious action would be taken if someone was punched or kicked but bullying does far more damage and nothing is done about it, or it is made worse by teachers or parents. I would rather take a beating than suffer from bullying. And bullying doesnt stop in schools, it continues in employment. It isnt acceptable, period.

The only school I have recent involvement with is Forge Valley and bullying seems to be endemic there from the stories I get brought home. Fortunately mine have always been untouched by bullying and I hope it stays that way.

This is something very important and personal to me, and sorry to say that I couldn't disagree more.

According to my Mum I started school as a happy, cheerful and confident child, who laughed and sang all of the time. Due to the constant bullying from Junior school up I left school as a painfully shy (to the extent that I physically could not speak to people other than my family) closed down, depressed person, with no confidence or self esteem, all that was left was a fear of people and agonising self doubt.

Far from finding bullying to be character building it destroyed mine, it also set me up for years of being a "yes" person, afraid to show any personality and relationship abuse.

The teachers at the school where I went I hold responsible for so much of my misery, I was bullied by children then as I began to close myself off from the world I was ridiculed/ignored/laughed at by the teachers, which obviously the kids loved and there I was helpless and fair game for all, and what a brilliant game it was for all of them. Then I discovered the joys of running away from school which initially got me physically dragged back crying from my home by a member of school staff, later I made sure that wouldn't happen by running off further afield where of course I was then in real danger.

My one saving grace which I am forever so so grateful was a personal development course provided by a charity called Scoop aid when I became a single parent, it gave me the tools that I needed and the "clear sight" to know where I had been, where I was going and what I needed to do to imrove myself and my life, so in my 40's I became a real person, a person that dared to have personality, say no and to deal with issues in my life...thank God for Scoop aid that scared little girl is gone, and I am now a happy and confident Human being.

We give schools our precious children, how dare they allow them to be damaged and sit back doing nothing, or laugh at the child thus enforcing that it is the childs own fault in some way? we are allowing these people the care of our precious children, our future...we need to make sure that they are up to the job,and if they are not we need to know why and that things are going to change.

Sorry that got a bit longer than I intended but anyway... :hihi:

good on you!:thumbsup: good post

If you mean you was questioning me on it being character building, I am aware that for many it can make you back off from situations in life and be much less confident. But fortunately, after years of this being the case for me I ended up surrounded by people who pretty much forced me to confront the bullies and learn not to let them walk all over me. Also, I think I changed a few years before I left school, I got the chance to stand up to people that could have otherwise have affected me for the rest of my life.

Also, my parents contacted the school numerous times, which got us nowhere, I ended up being put in a room with other pupils who were destructive during classes went and one of the helpers then decided to point out infront of everyone why I was there. I can assure you that teachers are to blame for a lot of bullying and infact do a lot of the bullying on occasion.

It actually took me accidentally doing something quite drastic for people to stop saying things to me. Don't get me wrong, I feel bad that it happened and would never do it on purpose but I suppose that person just got bit on the ass by karma. I'm also not going to go into that was.

I do want to say that some teachers were lovely, and really helped and understood and didn't point it out and make it obvious like some did. So that's amazing of them.

I am also thankful that it happened because I'm now hyper aware of bullying, which means I can tell when people need to talk or just sit and be quiet. I'm aware of others feelings all the time too. I'm also completely intolerant of any form of bullying, and will stick up for anyone.

another good'n:thumbsup:

I was questioning the suggestion that bullying is character-building;it is likely to erode rather than develop resilience.However the bullied person,and their parents need to develop a strategy to combat this behaviour and avoid a victim mentality.You have been highly critical of your teachers.Did your mother approach the school with your observations,and if so what happened?

Oh I see, people did used to think so, its horrible to think how many children have suffered be cause of that belief both in the past and also still suffer now :(

I agree the bullied person and their parents do need to work out a strategy to combat the bullying, sadly mine were not really able to do so, they did go down to school on many occasions but were more or less laughed at by the teachers, who even tried to say that the bullying was my fault because I was so shy :confused: I don't really think that teachers have a clue how to handle bullying, sadly I don't think that people in general don't, and when people can't find a way of dealing with it they often blame the victim because thats easiest.

So basically nothing happened, the head teacher just used to laugh at me and my parents felt intimidated, they came from a generation that has respect for authority, ...no one helped!

Teachers expect people to deal with bullies themselves,and learn a little autonomy rather than become dependent.Given you are now such a strong person as a result, is bullying a character-building experience?Perhaps you should applaud those teachers who let you work out your own solution rather than condemn them in their absence.:)

That is the worst pile of 1970s crap which allows teachers to wriggle out of any responsibility for dealing with bullying and blame the victim whilst telling them they should be grateful for their inaction and grateful for the bullying itself.

Bullying is not 'character building' it doesn't necessarily lead to strong characters but can often lead to real psychological damage with scars they'll carry into adulthood.

Thankfully the vast majority of teachers don't subscribe to this attitude these days and a hell of a lot of effort has gone into eradicating this kind of attitude from schools.

I find it bizarre that adults would never tolerate the kind of abuse and attacks victims of bullying face at school in their place of work but are happy to dismiss children facing the same problem as facing something 'character building' or accuse them of having a 'victim mentality'.

Well, if Sonia is better at anti-bullying, than you are at posting links, that would be a good start!


Sorry, something came up as soon as I posted the thread. let's try again.


http://www.ncab.org.au/Assets/Files/Fact%20Sheet_NCAB_Conference%202012_FINAL.pdf[1]

This is something very important and personal to me, and sorry to say that I couldn't disagree more.

According to my Mum I started school as a happy, cheerful and confident child, who laughed and sang all of the time. Due to the constant bullying from Junior school up I left school as a painfully shy (to the extent that I physically could not speak to people other than my family) closed down, depressed person, with no confidence or self esteem, all that was left was a fear of people and agonising self doubt.

Far from finding bullying to be character building it destroyed mine, it also set me up for years of being a "yes" person, afraid to show any personality and relationship abuse.

The teachers at the school where I went I hold responsible for so much of my misery, I was bullied by children then as I began to close myself off from the world I was ridiculed/ignored/laughed at by the teachers, which obviously the kids loved and there I was helpless and fair game for all, and what a brilliant game it was for all of them. Then I discovered the joys of running away from school which initially got me physically dragged back crying from my home by a member of school staff, later I made sure that wouldn't happen by running off further afield where of course I was then in real danger.

My one saving grace which I am forever so so grateful was a personal development course provided by a charity called Scoop aid when I became a single parent, it gave me the tools that I needed and the "clear sight" to know where I had been, where I was going and what I needed to do to imrove myself and my life, so in my 40's I became a real person, a person that dared to have personality, say no and to deal with issues in my life...thank God for Scoop aid that scared little girl is gone, and I am now a happy and confident Human being.

We give schools our precious children, how dare they allow them to be damaged and sit back doing nothing, or laugh at the child thus enforcing that it is the childs own fault in some way? we are allowing these people the care of our precious children, our future...we need to make sure that they are up to the job,and if they are not we need to know why and that things are going to change.

Sorry that got a bit longer than I intended but anyway... :hihi:



Thanks for that and you are spot on. I have got one child whose life has been blighted by bullying and I know of another who tried to commit suicide several times after being forced out of two schools. Sonia Sharp knew about both cases and did nothing to help the children.

These wretched teachers bleat on about their pensions and pay freezes when some of them are lucky to employed at all given they way they behave towards children and parents.

That is the worst pile of 1970s crap which allows teachers to wriggle out of any responsibility for dealing with bullying and blame the victim whilst telling them they should be grateful for their inaction and grateful for the bullying itself.

Bullying is not 'character building' it doesn't necessarily lead to strong characters but can often lead to real psychological damage with scars they'll carry into adulthood.

Thankfully the vast majority of teachers don't subscribe to this attitude these days and a hell of a lot of effort has gone into eradicating this kind of attitude from schools.

I find it bizarre that adults would never tolerate the kind of abuse and attacks victims of bullying face at school in their place of work but are happy to dismiss children facing the same problem as facing something 'character building' or accuse them of having a 'victim mentality'.

Can you explain why some children are bullied and some are not?Why mention the 1970s?Why assume that teachers take no responsibility-you are generalising rather,and you sound a little bitter about the system.Perhaps you were bullied and found no-one to help you?You certainly seem over -assertive now.

I agree the bullied person and their parents do need to work out a strategy to combat the bullying, sadly mine were not really able to do so, they did go down to school on many occasions but were more or less laughed at by the teachers, who even tried to say that the bullying was my fault because I was so shy :confused: I don't really think that teachers have a clue how to handle bullying, sadly I don't think that people in general don't, and when people can't find a way of dealing with it they often blame the victim because thats easiest.


Well said

The problem is that parents trying to deal with bullying require support from schools. Too many schools see bullying as a badge of shame and ignore it or cover it up.

I know of one recent case of a girl repeatedly bullied and the school refusing to help so she refused to go to school. She was thrown out of the school for non attendance. That's how Sharp deals with bullying. It's an absolute disgrace.

So basically nothing happened, the head teacher just used to laugh at me and my parents felt intimidated, they came from a generation that has respect for authority, ...no one helped!


And the consequence of that is today's lack of respect for authority. Teachers constantly moan about parents but they bring it on themselves by failing to deal with serious problems.

Well said

The problem is that parents trying to deal with bullying require support from schools. Too many schools see bullying as a badge of shame and ignore it or cover it up.

I know of one recent case of a girl repeatedly bullied and the school refusing to help so she refused to go to school. She was thrown out of the school for non attendance. That's how Sharp deals with bullying. It's an absolute disgrace.

I totally concur-it was a disgrace for the girl to absent herself,and the school took the appropriate action.However I do not see why you refer to Ms Sharp as she has no direct say in what individual schools do;they decide through their board of governors.

I totally concur-it was a disgrace for the girl to absent herself,and the school took the appropriate action.However I do not see why you refer to Ms Sharp as she has no direct say in what individual schools do;they decide through their board of governors.



I assume you are childless. If not I pity your kid(s).

Sharp has everything to do with it when parents have to resort to complaining to her because the schools are doing nothing. Her responsibility is to ensure every child in this city has the best possible outcome from the education tax payers pay for. Given that Sheffield is 131st in the country for education I suggest it's a responsibility she is totally unsuited for.

The worst bullying I have ever seen was in High Stoors. What did the headmistress do at the time? Suggest the victim move schools after he was physically attacked. Bullying needs to be addressed more strictly with more sever consequences.

My daughter was bullied and was given a mentor to help her out, who addmited hidding from her so he didn't have to deal with it, i even have this in writing in his report's, he also told me to take her out of school and he would arrange home schooling,but when he found out there where no fund's left for this he denied this and arrived with the attendence officer and threatened me with prison. After lot's of meeting's with year head's and other bodies of the school i was phoned at home and more or less threatened by the headmisstrss who was told by my legal aid she could not contact me again. I have lot's of written reports that i took to a solicitor and was advised to sue for the lack of education my girl had but she just wanted it over and forgoten. It still makes me so mad that they all got away with treating my girl this way but have to respect her wishes.

I am 58 years old and will always remember the bullying, verbal and physical violence I was subject to whilst at grammar school. I clearly remember the names of the two boys who bullied me (I am female) and wonder if they remember me, and what they did to me. I think not. What would they would think and how would they feel if a daughter of theirs was bullied at school by boys. I ended up having to change schools as nothing was done about it. Bullying affects a child for life and needs to be stamped out. I dont think bullies realise the life long effect their bullying has on others.

I assume you are childless. If not I pity your kid(s).

Sharp has everything to do with it when parents have to resort to complaining to her because the schools are doing nothing. Her responsibility is to ensure every child in this city has the best possible outcome from the education tax payers pay for. Given that Sheffield is 131st in the country for education I suggest it's a responsibility she is totally unsuited for.

Your pity is misplaced-save it for yourself as you clearly have problems.Sharp has indirect responsibility which is devolved to schools,and cannot be held liable in person.somewhere has to occupy place 131 in the tables,why not Sheffield?You seem to think all solutions lie with the school rather than assume responsibility.On economic matters you advocate liberty,but now you want the state to micro-manage your personal problems.This is highly contradictory and and it seems you are confused,and make random comments to agitate your audience.

I am 58 years old and will always remember the bullying, verbal and physical violence I was subject to whilst at grammar school. I clearly remember the names of the two boys who bullied me (I am female) and wonder if they remember me, and what they did to me. I think not. What would they would think and how would they feel if a daughter of theirs was bullied at school by boys. I ended up having to change schools as nothing was done about it. Bullying affects a child for life and needs to be stamped out. I dont think bullies realise the life long effect their bullying has on others.

The last point made is accurate but remember bullies are also children.

My daughter was bullied and was given a mentor to help her out, who addmited hidding from her so he didn't have to deal with it, i even have this in writing in his report's, he also told me to take her out of school and he would arrange home schooling,but when he found out there where no fund's left for this he denied this and arrived with the attendence officer and threatened me with prison. After lot's of meeting's with year head's and other bodies of the school i was phoned at home and more or less threatened by the headmisstrss who was told by my legal aid she could not contact me again. I have lot's of written reports that i took to a solicitor and was advised to sue for the lack of education my girl had but she just wanted it over and forgoten. It still makes me so mad that they all got away with treating my girl this way but have to respect her wishes.

You have chosen not to pursue this matter which does suggest you find the way ahead too much trouble.Your solicitor was presumably likely to benefit from litigation,why did you fail to act on their advice?you have a grievance against the school but have allowed them to fail others by your inertia.

You have chosen not to pursue this matter which does suggest you find the way ahead too much trouble.Your solicitor was presumably likely to benefit from litigation,why did you fail to act on their advice?you have a grievance against the school but have allowed them to fail others by your inertia.

My daught was ready for leaving school at this time and just wanted it all to be left behind her. It was not upto me to persue this the solicitor said it had to be her and she did not want to even with my support.

My daught was ready for leaving school at this time and just wanted it all to be left behind her. It was not upto me to persue this the solicitor said it had to be her and she did not want to even with my support.

I am surprised that you did not have the right to pursue this matter,given you were threatened by the head.It would seem both you and your daughter had separate issues meaning either or both could have taken some action.What is your daughter doing now,is she fine?

My daughter is fine now thank's.

This is something very important and personal to me, and sorry to say that I couldn't disagree more.

According to my Mum I started school as a happy, cheerful and confident child, who laughed and sang all of the time. Due to the constant bullying from Junior school up I left school as a painfully shy (to the extent that I physically could not speak to people other than my family) closed down, depressed person, with no confidence or self esteem, all that was left was a fear of people and agonising self doubt.

Far from finding bullying to be character building it destroyed mine, it also set me up for years of being a "yes" person, afraid to show any personality and relationship abuse.

The teachers at the school where I went I hold responsible for so much of my misery, I was bullied by children then as I began to close myself off from the world I was ridiculed/ignored/laughed at by the teachers, which obviously the kids loved and there I was helpless and fair game for all, and what a brilliant game it was for all of them. Then I discovered the joys of running away from school which initially got me physically dragged back crying from my home by a member of school staff, later I made sure that wouldn't happen by running off further afield where of course I was then in real danger.

My one saving grace which I am forever so so grateful was a personal development course provided by a charity called Scoop aid when I became a single parent, it gave me the tools that I needed and the "clear sight" to know where I had been, where I was going and what I needed to do to imrove myself and my life, so in my 40's I became a real person, a person that dared to have personality, say no and to deal with issues in my life...thank God for Scoop aid that scared little girl is gone, and I am now a happy and confident Human being.

We give schools our precious children, how dare they allow them to be damaged and sit back doing nothing, or laugh at the child thus enforcing that it is the childs own fault in some way? we are allowing these people the care of our precious children, our future...we need to make sure that they are up to the job,and if they are not we need to know why and that things are going to change.

Sorry that got a bit longer than I intended but anyway... :hihi:

Thank you for posting that - I can't think of anything else to say in context to the thread - But your story moved me and I wanted to say so.

The last point made is accurate but remember bullies are also children.

quite so, but still old enough to know that what they are doing is very wrong, just as I and others knew

quite so, but still old enough to know that what they are doing is very wrong, just as I and others knew

I take it you were one of the bullies then given your use of the plural.

gnvqsos - try reading the thread, including my first post no 31 before you add your stupid little comments

Your pity is misplaced-save it for yourself as you clearly have problems.Sharp has indirect responsibility which is devolved to schools,and cannot be held liable in person.somewhere has to occupy place 131 in the tables,why not Sheffield?You seem to think all solutions lie with the school rather than assume responsibility.On economic matters you advocate liberty,but now you want the state to micro-manage your personal problems.This is highly contradictory and and it seems you are confused,and make random comments to agitate your audience.



Your support of Sharp and acceptance of Sheffield being 131st shows a lack of judgement and a lack of ambition. If Sharp isn't responsible for the performances of schools why does she go to such lengths to trot out her increasingly implausible excuses every time the league tables come out? Sharp can and has been held responsible for the actions of schools and her own abysmal Multi Agency Support Teams.

Thank you to everyone who has posted informative and constructive comments. I have also had some depressingly familiar PMs. Please feel free to PM me if you have a story to tell but don't want to tell it out loud.

The worst bullying I have ever seen was in High Stoors. What did the headmistress do at the time? Suggest the victim move schools after he was physically attacked. Bullying needs to be addressed more strictly with more sever consequences.


I've heard High Storrs is still really bad for bullying. Some of it being down to the characters they bus in from the other side of the city in the name of equality. I know two girls who had to leave through bullying and worse from "ethnic minorities"

It was High Storrs where the head teacher was "retired on the grounds of ill health" (yeah, right!!) within a week after complaints about bullying were sent to OFSTED.

Your support of Sharp and acceptance of Sheffield being 131st shows a lack of judgement and a lack of ambition. If Sharp isn't responsible for the performances of schools why does she go to such lengths to trot out her increasingly implausible excuses every time the league tables come out? Sharp can and has been held responsible for the actions of schools and her own abysmal Multi Agency Support Teams.

Is she responsible for academies?I thought they were no longer under LEA control,but you seem to be the expert.

I've heard High Storrs is still really bad for bullying. Some of it being down to the characters they bus in from the other side of the city in the name of equality. I know two girls who had to leave through bullying and worse from "ethnic minorities"

It was High Storrs where the head teacher was "retired on the grounds of ill health" (yeah, right!!) within a week after complaints about bullying were sent to OFSTED.

It is great to see you are an inclusive type and believe in fairness.

It is great to see you are an inclusive type and believe in fairness.

School kids should sit down, be quiet and do as they are told.

Why should schools tip toe around those that won't do this, all in the aid of equality and fairness?

It is the good kids, the ones who sit down and be quiet, who suffer and are the ones not being included.

Stop making excuses - if these kids can't behave, if they bully other children then they should be moved.

School kids should sit down, be quiet and do as they are told.

Why should schools tip toe around those that won't do this, all in the aid of equality and fairness?

It is the good kids, the ones who sit down and be quiet, who suffer and are the ones not being included.

Stop making excuses - if these kids can't behave, if they bully other children then they should be moved.

Is this Mr Gradgrind speaking?

It is great to see you are an inclusive type and believe in fairness.


"Inclusive" being a euphemism for "Our schools are horrible but there are some nice schools on the other side of the city so let's send a load of yobs over there and trash them as well". That's what the vile Sonia Sharp believes is equality and fairness.

"Inclusive" being a euphemism for "Our schools are horrible but there are some nice schools on the other side of the city so let's send a load of yobs over there and trash them as well". That's what the vile Sonia Sharp believes is equality and fairness.

You definitely ought to become an Ofsted inspector with your well thought out and synthesised evaluation.Its a consequence of the free market where the better off gravitate to areas of higher status,leaving other areas depleted of wealth and talent.Naturally you will oppose the workings of a free market,being a socialist and all.Greetings comrade Jim!

Bullying is a problem with human beings in general, its how our species sorts out the pecking order and pier groups and clicks. Schools just artificially compound it and take it to the extreme compared to the real world.

Yes it's a problem in every school and in fact in every work place pretty much. It does seem to be part of the human condition that some people are vile to others for a variety of reasons. Which doesn't make it ok, after all I think a decent society is judged by the way the weak and vulnerable or different are treated. I can assure you that there are always lots of us who do take it very seriously indeed, with varying degrees of success. I still have emails sent by parents grateful for bullying spotted and sorted. We can't however always get it right especially when the children of warring families bring it into school. But we do our best. Any school which says it doesn't have a bullying problem is deluding itself. It's how it's dealt with, and everyday, I see lots of school staff doing their best to educate and inspire young people, and yes, deal with all manner of issues facing them, including bullying.

Thank you for posting that - I can't think of anything else to say in context to the thread - But your story moved me and I wanted to say so.

I only just got round to checking this thread again, thank you Blinks for your kind comment, I have to say that I was a bit unsure after I posted all of that about what comments it would receive but all is well (up to now :hihi: ).

The main reason for saying what I did is that we need to push for our teachers to have some training to deal with bullying, people generally just muddle through life, doing the best that they know how, teachers are no different...but this subject is so important for the future generations, teachers need to be able to help children to reach their potential and if that means helping the child to have confidence the teacher needs to have the training to do that.

I would say every school in the country has some bullying ...the degree of which will vary.

agree all schools have got bullying issues some worse than others

Get the victims to kick boxing classes to learn how to defend themselves. Bullies only understand one kind of langauge and it isn't having a finger wagged at them and someone saying, "naughty"

Just don't make the mistake of taking your kids to a martial arts class where all the bullies go. Can't believe my dad made that sodding mistake. Bless him, he wasn't blessed with brains.

Seriously, anyone thats the victim of repetative physical attacts needs to learn hot to look after themselves. If your going to get hurt, at least give them some pain in the process. It may make them think twice next time.

agree all schools have got bullying issues some worse than others


No they haven't. That's the official line isn't it?

Schools can't admit they have a problem because head teachers see that as a badge of shame and that's why it doesn't get sorted out. Billions have been poured into anti bullying schemes and it hasn't made any difference. All it has done is sweep it further under the carpet.

i dont think theres a school in the uk that doesnt have bullies

bullying is alive and kicking in sheffield schools - only yesterday i was on the phone to my 14yo daughters school about some girls picking on her.
the teachers response? -> the girls are known bullies who have done this before and i was to be assured that they would be dealt with quickly and appropriately. my daughter this morning asked me to drop her at the school gates as she was worried the bullies would be around.

if the girls are known bullies, why are they still at school :loopy::loopy:

Bullies only understand one kind of langauge and it isn't having a finger wagged at them and someone saying, "naughty".:thumbsup:

My Dad taught me this very simple maxim from a very early age: "an eye for an eye, and the whole face for a tooth". It's the Sicilian roots, y'see :hihi:

It's served me well, and it looks like it's serving my daughter well too, whom I have taught to always (i) ignore the first attempt, warn bully not to do again, and tell the teacher and (ii) respond to second instance of bullying disproportionately (no warning, get in there with both fists from the off, lay'em dead).

She's youngest in her class, always has been, by nearly a year due to her birthday date. There's been 2 or 3 'instances' in the past 2 years...and she doesn't get picked on anymore ;)

The headmistress of her school is really good, though, I'll give her that. Acknowleges bullying if and when it happens, promises to sort it - and sorts it. And does not give me any grief (not even a hint...but then she knows better than to do that :hihi:) about the black eye my daughter dispensed in self-defence. Must be why she consistently gets schools top-starred by OFSTED whichever school she goes to manage.

Thanks for all your contributions to this thread. Sheffield's dreadful education chief, Dr Sonia Sharp, claims to be an expert in anti-bullying and makes a name for herself telling other people how to avoid the problem. It beggars belief she is considered to be an expert in anti-bullying but, hey, there's one born every minute.

Sharp was due to speak at a conference in Australia as part of her profile raising in that country prior to joining the Australian government's education department. You may like to know a number of disgruntled Sheffield parents complained to the conference organisors about the inappropriateness of Sharp as a speaker and they were sent the link to this thread. As a result Sharp has been dropped from the conference and it seems that the Australian government may be having second thoughts about her as well.

Those parents of kids who have and are being bullied under Sharp's regime should be reassured that, thanks to your SF contribution, she has not profited from her hypocrisy. Small comfort but we'll take what we can get.

Speaking personally I cannot abide bullying but remember it's not just physical bullying that can hurt a child or, an adult for that matter. My 3 were only slight things at school & were bullied I got sick of the number of times I went up to school, but nothing was done.

Remember the old sticks & stones rhyme; well names hurt just as much, please remember that.

Our eldest daughter came home one day & would not go out as the lass that was bullying her was outside, my missus went barmy & told our daughter she was sick of this & to get it sorted. So out she went & to her credit knocked 7 colours out of this person, needless to say she was never bothered again.

Now I don't endorse this method but sometimes it's the only way, what we have to realise is that basically bullies are cowards who, get their bravado from hanging around in gangs, get them on their own & the result is what our daughter did to one.

Bullies are vermin but as people have rightly said it's not just in schools, it also happens in the workplace and, while ever schools or bosses for that matter don't act it will continue.

I don't know the answer I'm afraid; but one start would be that when a pupil reports it to a teacher then it is acted upon immediately, the main problem is the nanny state we live in that allows thugs to get away with anything.

Teachers & police & parents for that have no powers; & if they get involved can end up being prosecuted, people will disagree but we do need a level of discipline in school, I'd bring back the cane & slipper & the good old clip round the lug hole.

Now I know people will be up in arms about that comment but remember this people in my age group & just a wee bit younger will know what I'm on about and, know that we grew up with something the scum of today don't have; respect for others & people's belongings.

People have to realise that there are children that by their nature are quiet & these appear to be the easy targets, & when they are bullied they regress even further until they do something they cannot come back from. That is a tragedy when a child takes their life just to escape bullying, that is the extreme but it happens.

Saying it is under control is as they say total cobblers; kids will always fall out that's acceptable but, bullying is not so lets stamp it now once & for all.

I was bullied in school, only by the same people because our 'groups' didn't get along. But the teachers would be the first to try and cover it up and tell me I was lying about it..

Example, we used to sit in name order in one class which put me next to someone I really didn't get along with as they used to constantly say stuff to me. I told the teacher this, and she told me to sit there anyway and she would 'monitor' it, now, most of the lesson she ignored it happening until I got upset and walked out, at which point she moved me.

Then, in another lesson a teacher would laugh when one girl used to shout names and verbal abuse at other girls in the class.. She was on tv the other year on a BBC Three programme discussing teaching problem children. It was very annoying to watch knowing how crap she was.

I've got to say at least half my teachers were aware that people were bullying and being bullied, and just chose to ignore it.

I also don't know many people who weren't bullied, from different schools and I think they all had the same experiences as me.

I've got to say though, I'm soooo glad I was bullied, it's made me such a strong person now and there's no way I'd put up with what I did then.

I think the only teachers who are good at dealing with bullying, are the ones who have been bullied.

Oh, and I left school 7ish years ago. It has got worse from what I know.

I was also bullied at school, 5 long years whilst at secondary school and like this person the teachers openly chose to deny it. 27 years on and I hate them for it, for doing precisely nothing... yet when I finally snapped in the final year at school apparently it was the first they'd heard about it and tried to blame me for retaliating in order to defend myself from bully boy Paul Castleton, Steven Spriggs and his cronies. Nowadays I can look after myself and if necessary I will....and in the words above "I've got to say though, I'm soooo glad I was bullied, it's made me such a strong person now and there's no way I'd put up with what I did then".


However in answer to the original question, yes bullying still occurs in Sheffield's schools and is actually quite rampant and still the teachers do sweet sod all about it. I think the're worse now than they were when I was at school as they know they have to fill in 47 forms to report it and its better to turn a blind eye. Speaking from experience I can only speak for whats happening at my son's school. They see it happening and the headteacher won't do a thing about it. If it continues I will be taking further action against the school in question via a solicitor and through the Sheffield Star if necessary, maybe then they will listen or maybe it will take the serious injury or death of a child to actually impliment something.

[QUOTE=randyblade;8878967]
Our eldest daughter came home one day & would not go out as the lass that was bullying her was outside, my missus went barmy & told our daughter she was sick of this & to get it sorted. So out she went & to her credit knocked 7 colours out of this person, needless to say she was never bothered again.

Now I don't endorse this method but sometimes it's the only way, what we have to realise is that basically bullies are cowards who, get their bravado from hanging around in gangs, get them on their own & the result is what our daughter did to one.

Bullies are vermin but as people have rightly said it's not just in schools, it also happens in the workplace and, while ever schools or bosses for that matter don't act it will continue.

QUOTE]

As mentioned in my previous correspondence I retaliated and as mentioned I was never bothered again, word got round faster than a ferret up a drainpipe!

Bullies are cowards in the highest form, they are scum!

I always tried to avoid trouble at school and maybe thats why I was picked on, avoiding rather than facing up to the bullies.

Give me 5 minutes with each of the two who made my life hell now... and lets see who's last man standing!
But then again i'd probably get locked up for assault....don't you just love justice!!

[QUOTE

Give me 5 minutes with each of the two who made my life hell now... and lets see who's last man standing!
But then again i'd probably get locked up for assault....don't you just love justice!!

Norseman I agree with you most heartily & that's what I said when I said about being powerless, in a nanny state.

I must admire the stand you made for yourself, but not all kids can do it, that's not a criticism of anything in your post either.

However in answer to the original question, yes bullying still occurs in Sheffield's schools and is actually quite rampant and still the teachers do sweet sod all about it. I think the're worse now than they were when I was at school as they know they have to fill in 47 forms to report it and its better to turn a blind eye. Speaking from experience I can only speak for whats happening at my son's school. They see it happening and the headteacher won't do a thing about it. If it continues I will be taking further action against the school in question via a solicitor and through the Sheffield Star if necessary, maybe then they will listen or maybe it will take the serious injury or death of a child to actually impliment something.


I wouldn't put too much faith in The Star. They are too close to the political elite (lol) and rely on them for information. They won't do anything to upset the council management.

Part of the problem is that Sharp is supposed to be an academic expert in anti-bullying. Her background is in Educational Psychology and she is in the National Lead on Educational Psychology for the Association of Directors of Children’s Services. Consequently, it doesn't look good for her if her own fiefdom is littered with cases of bullying. That's why there is a citywide reluctance to admit there is a problem. I can tell you that some kids have had worse than serious injury and it has been covered up to protect her reputation. The result is that bullies are being allowed to go unhindered and kids are suffering just to protect the reputation of Dr Sharp so she can prosper on her £120,000 a year.