the only driver in our house
how can I convince my boyfriend it would be quite practical for him to learn to drive as I dont want to be the only one who knows how to drive
he grew up in London so never saw the need but I really think he should
so any help or suggestions would be appreciated thanks

Stop giving him lifts and make him do the weekly shopping on foot... Oh, and withhold sex.

jb

Stop giving him lifts and make him do the weekly shopping on foot... Oh, and withhold sex.

jb

having a really good laugh at this Barley cheers :hihi: :hihi: :hihi:

I think you need to ask yourself why dont you want to be the only driver in your house.

the only driver in our house
how can I convince my boyfriend it would be quite practical for him to learn to drive as I dont want to be the only one who knows how to drive
he grew up in London so never saw the need but I really think he should
so any help or suggestions would be appreciated thanks

I think if hes okay with it, you shouldnt stress. Unless, you are the taxi for him to get to A to B. If thats the case, the least he should give you is a share in the petrol costs.

I gave up driving when I moved here and been glad I did. No more road rage, petrol, insurance and maintenance costs to put out of pocket to. My license, from where it was issued, expired earlier this year. If I wish to go back, Ill need to drive and have my UK license. Though, thats a problem for later than sooner. If I was to pass, I still wouldnt have a car

I've been the non-driver in two long-term relationships and nothing on earth would have persuaded me. If he doesn't want to drive and there's no really pressing need (i.e. multiple children to transport, you live in the depths of the countryside, etc) then you may be on to a loser.

If he's taking advantage of your good nature in terms of lifts, though, then just tell him straight that's not acceptable. And get petrol money.

Tell him how you feel. That's the first step.

Lessons are not cheap. Perhaps this is what's putting him off learning. You could help him out with this.

If he is using you as a taxi just stop - he will either learn to get alternate means of transport or will learn himself.

the only driver in our house
how can I convince my boyfriend it would be quite practical for him to learn to drive as I dont want to be the only one who knows how to drive
he grew up in London so never saw the need but I really think he should
so any help or suggestions would be appreciated thanks for a start stop being sexist :hihi:how many men on here whos other half dont drive yet take them shopping/taxiing there kids/etc yet dont complain :huh:

I was really intrigue to look at this.

but forgive me why dont u go and find something better to moan about if the bloke wants to drive he will if he dont he wont?
what makes you think you have the authority to try and convince him he needs to drive if you feel like a taxi dont do it, etc if hes managing without a car whats the incentive? Alot of my friends drive but i dont and to be honest it hasnt really bothered me i dont need a car yet.
seriously just leave him to it.

All that will change is that he'll drive to the pub, have a few drinks while you drink coke and then you'll drive back!
Story of my life......

You could try to encourage him to drive pointing out all the positives but it really is up to him whether or not he wishes to learn to drive. Have you actually asked him why he doesn't want to learn to drive?

Some people can get quite anxious just at the thought of having to drive a car and decide that it really isn't for them.

Try and find out why he is so reluctant to drive before trying to convince him that he should.

I dont see what the issue is with him not driving.

My brother is older than me and has always said he is not interested in driving - as public transport is decent enough and he tend to walk places.

I am currently learning to drive and at £22 a lesson (1hour) its not cheap and if you go with big companies like BSM/AA its about £30 an hour!

If you feel he is taking advantage of you being a driver and constantly wanting lifts etc tell him no or make sure he contributes to the petrol. My B/F does drive me about when he can and he knows I appreciate him taking me shopping/work etc but I do contribute to the petrol so its fair x

I suppose looking back on my OP it was more of a rant then anything else really cos he honestly does not take advantage he uses his 2 feet and heartbeat to get to work,pub etc but we drive to do our shop as we do live together I just thought it would benefit him but I was wrong as it is quite expensive to learn how to drive and at the moment the money could be better spent elsewhere
cheers for your replies they have helped me see things differently

i've been driving 35 years now,and honestly if i had to start again i wouldn't bother,roads these days are crowded ill maintained and the cost of running a car is extortionate,if i didn't need mine for work i wouldn't have one so if he can do without i wouldn't encourage him to drive,just my two pence worth....

I was wrong as it is quite expensive to learn how to drive and at the moment the money could be better spent elsewhere


On you, you mean ;)

On you, you mean ;)

lol we are actually going to buy a
house together lol but my birthday is in a couple weeks

lol we are actually going to buy a
house together lol but my birthday is in a couple weeks

BINGO.... you can do a lot worse than a boyfriend that doesn't drive, just shut up and spend his money :D

hahahahahaha he makes more he
can splash the cash a little lol

hahahahahaha he makes more he
can splash the cash a little lol

:) All the best to both of you.

:) All the best to both of you.

thank you Murphy:)

How long have you been driving, little boots? I was in the same position as you and as I had been driving for more than 3 years and was over 21, decided just to add my bf to my insurance (for a surprisingly small amount!) so he could 'have a little go' and see whether he really did hate it (he was convinced driving wasn't for him but had never tried)... He loved it! I ended up teaching him (not always the best idea I know) but it saved alot of money and he just ended up needing a few lessons with a qualified driving instructor to learn a couple of things I had missed. He passed his test with just 1 minor first time!! One year on he has his own car, is a fantastic taxi service and doesn't let me drive anywhere :-)

Oh and just to add, my car is still in one piece too

the only driver in our house
how can I convince my boyfriend it would be quite practical for him to learn to drive as I dont want to be the only one who knows how to drive
he grew up in London so never saw the need but I really think he should
so any help or suggestions would be appreciated thanks

Threaten to give him the elbow. If you are worth going out with, you are worth being driven home occasionally.
I’ve come across these types of guys before. They just want to be chauffeured around, and having a driving licence would get in the way of that, and very likely get in the way of their drinking.
You are going to have to face up to this one day unless you want the permanent chauffeur position. Better to do it sooner than later.

How long have you been driving, little boots? I was in the same position as you and as I had been driving for more than 3 years and was over 21, decided just to add my bf to my insurance (for a surprisingly small amount!) so he could 'have a little go' and see whether he really did hate it (he was convinced driving wasn't for him but had never tried)... He loved it! I ended up teaching him (not always the best idea I know) but it saved alot of money and he just ended up needing a few lessons with a qualified driving instructor to learn a couple of things I had missed. He passed his test with just 1 minor first time!! One year on he has his own car, is a fantastic taxi service and doesn't let me drive anywhere :-)

Oh and just to add, my car is still in one piece too

I have been driving since turning 17 was my mum and dad's birthday pressie that year he has had a go a few times but quite unsure if he wants to do it We talked bout it last night and he sez when we have kids he will for sure then I would have no worries starting him out by teaching him before he could have a few proper lessons with a qualified instructor so cheers for advice Tiger lily

Threaten to give him the elbow. If you are worth going out with, you are worth being driven home occasionally.
I’ve come across these types of guys before. They just want to be chauffeured around, and having a driving licence would get in the way of that, and very likely get in the way of their drinking.
You are going to have to face up to this one day unless you want the permanent chauffeur position. Better to do it sooner than later.

There's a message in there - somewhere.

My brother (who retired in August) never had a driving licence.

I once asked him 'Why not?' and he said 'Because I'm no bloody good at it!'

Fair comment.

I ride motorcycles. I enjoy riding bikes (well, not so much around here where it's flat and the roads go in straight lines.) Speed is not a factor. - My bike will do about 135, but I spent a chunk of my life doing about 600 50 feet above the ground, so speed on the ground is boring.

I jioned the IAM (bikes) (which is probably why I'm still alive to write this ... they taught me how not to kill myself.)

Eventually, somebody said: "Why don't you do the car test?" "Because I don't like driving a bloody car" " That's a good reason to do the course."

It was indeed. I learned to transpose the bike skills to the car; I learned how to make the car do exactly what I want and I began to enjoy driving a tin can.

I prefer to ride a bike - but when I drive a car, I try to do so as well as I can.

But if you (or anybody else) don't want to drive a car ...What's the problem?

Are there no taxis in Sheffield?

One year on he ... doesn't let me drive anywhere

Self preservation:D.

I prefer to ride a bike - but when I drive a car, I try to do so as well as I can.

But if you (or anybody else) don't want to drive a car ...What's the problem?

Are there no taxis in Sheffield?

There are indeed taxis in Sheffield. I quite often use them. There are also some very nice pubs and restaurants out in Derbyshire that I like to use too. I meet friends in them a couple of times a week. Now I'm sure a taxi driver would be happy to whip us out to the Monsal Head and back, and probably charge £80 or £90 to do so. But when we have a car that's the way we will be travelling. So when a boyfriend asks me out to the Monsal a few times I wouldn't expect him to land me with the driving each time whilst he landed himself with drinking the wine. It isn't going to be a problem if it occurs once or twice, but I could see it really starting to irritate after a year or two.

By the way I don't have a problem riding pillion on a bike, although dress code for dinner might be an issue.

If he don't want to drive then its his choice, maybe he feels better off without a car.

As a couple you should weigh up the pros and cons of him (and you both) driving.

The cost is a very big factor. Parking for two cars? Need for two cars?

Your insurance will most likely be cheaper, and unless petrol hits £5, maybe even £10 a Litre, insurance will quite likely be the biggest factor to consider.

the only driver in our house
how can I convince my boyfriend it would be quite practical for him to learn to drive as I dont want to be the only one who knows how to drive
he grew up in London so never saw the need but I really think he should
so any help or suggestions would be appreciated thanks

Everytime he asks for a lift give him the number of the local taxi firm lololol

Couldn't you pop some L plates on and let him have a go with you as instructor? You'd have to put him on your insurance, not sure how much that would be, but it would give him a taster and cut down on the number of lessons he'd need.

Having a driving license gives you options. He doesn't HAVE to use it, but it's there if he needs it, maybe for future jobs, perhaps if you moved out to the sticks, or (as you mentioned) if you have kids. Why not learn now, when there's no pressing need? You don't suddenly have to buy a second car and all the expense that comes with it, it just means he can share the responsibility of driving when the need arises.

I kind of look at it as shirking responsibility. He sees no need to drive as you do it. If you are happy to, then no problem, but will you always see it this way?

Driving is useful and can be fun, but can also be part of the long list of domestic chores, if it's necessary in your household. Would you feel the same if he felt there was no need to do the washing, put the bins out, mop the floor etc?

any help or suggestions would be appreciated thanks
My suggestion: he should find himself another girlfriend.

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My suggestion: he should find himself another girlfriend.

I agree, if it's that huge a deal dump him, and look for a boyfriend who can drive.