a woman will reluctantly stand in front of the mirror, chewing her lip, frowning and searching for wobbly bits until she finds one (even though she probably looks utterly gorgeous!), ignore the fab bits, phone her friends to discuss diets, then have a glass/bottle of wine.
a man will sashay up to the mirror, lovingly caress his beer belly (years of practise and hard work), wink at himself (i wrote wink!) whilst thinking `sexy beast` and strut off to the pub!

she,d kill me if i went off to the pub