I have to post this question after being inspired by another thread.

It is never wrong to act or react or be selfish..... that is what makes us human and more importantly an individual...... as long as you are selfish for the right reasons and you can live with the consequences of your actions.

I Think you need to look after no 1...but at the same time consider the feelings of others who will be effected by your choice/decision...and then come up with a balance...e.g. my next door neighbour is a tree loving 88 year old that would not agree to me chopping down that tree that’s blocking my sun light ...so I invite her for afternoon tea and the best cakes I can buy...then comment on how dark it is in here...if she agrees I would then talk her into getting my chainsaw out and cut the f***er down(I would show her how to use the chainsaw) He presto were both happy :D :D

ps I know what your all thinking...that poor fragile 88 year old lady...trust me she's a tough old bird...and she's cleaning up as we speak :thumbsup:

Just ignore me ...I’m drunk…happens every Sunday(at the meet)…my neighbour is in fact 88 and very sweet and if I saw her lifting more than 2 shopping bags I would rush to help :P

Originally posted by ukgun
Just ignore me ...I’m drunk…happens every Sunday(at the meet)…my neighbour is in fact 88 and very sweet and if I saw her lifting more than 2 shopping bags I would rush to help :P

So you wouldnt help her if she had 1 or 2 bags? How selfish of you :o

:rolleyes:

Originally posted by wayne72
I have to post this question after being inspired by another thread.
This one? (http://www.sheffieldforum.co.uk/showthread.php?s=&threadid=71445) :D

Well i've voted "Yes", reason being because by natural selection, our genetic programming as made us to be selfish!

Originally posted by wayne72
Well i've voted "Yes", reason being because by natural selection, our genetic programming as made us to be selfish!
Animals and human beings also 'cooperate' for the sake of survival....

Originally posted by Strix
This one? (http://www.sheffieldforum.co.uk/showthread.php?s=&threadid=71445) :D

LOL no not that one. I put the PC away and gave up my Peak Oil fight following that post. Then my GF read it (yes she reads this forum, but she doesn't post) and asked me how could I just give up on somthing I feel so strongly about.

When I explained that I felt I was neglecting her, she just replied "I'd tell you iof you were".

So what else could I do :thumbsup:

This was the Thread http://www.sheffieldforum.co.uk/showthread.php?s=&threadid=75652

I married a couple of extremely selfish men - but now I'm rid of them both. I was the complete opposite but my experiences have made me a little wiser.

It also depends on what type of relationship you have. If one of you is working then the other should take care of the domestic side of things. I do know a couple of wives who always have it their own way - the husbands work then come home to clean up and take care of the kids. I couldn't do that!

Originally posted by spyro2000
So you wouldnt help her if she had 1 or 2 bags? How selfish of you :o

:rolleyes:

She is a very independent lady and i would not want her to feel totally useless...no i think 2 shopping bags will do.....unless she's been buying concrete lead or something similar:D :D :D

Originally posted by tiffy
I married a couple of extremely selfish men


Is this not illegal:D..

Originally posted by wayne72
I have to post this question after being inspired by another thread.

There's no answer appropriate if you live in a world that isn't monochrome.
Sometimes you need to look after your interests first as no one else is going too, othertimes you need to consider other people, be that a small group, 1 person or the whole world.

There is nothing wrong with being a bit selfish.

OCCASIONALLY it is good, make it the habit of a lifetime & you will have very few friends to see you off.

Everyone is selfish to some extent but in some cases it can be wrong.

In most instances in life I think that it is ESSENTIAL that everybody is selfish to a small extent.

If you love and look after others you first have to love and look after yourself. You may be able to let yourself slip from your own priorities list for a short while, but you can't do it for long without there being implications on your mental and physical health, rendering you useless to the people that are on your priorities list, so it is in their interests for you to be sufficiently selfish to look after yourself even in a time when you're spread pretty thin in your life.

There's a difference between putting yourself first in this way and only considering your own needs when interacting with others, which I hope I never do.

That's interesting Medusa.

I assume you're speaking from experience, but do you think that that rule doesn't need to apply if the people you're putting first are not selfish themselves ;)

Well, it's generally misguided to devote yourself to somebody who never gives anything in return anyway (I know that bit by experience).

If all people involved are unselfish it can still be necessary to redraw the priorities list with yourself at the top occasionally (for health reasons or at specific times). Unselfish people will never hold that against you as they will recognise that sometimes these things become important.

I was thinking of caring for children specifically- for the most part you put them first in all things, but if you neglect yourself to the point that your caring for them becomes impaired then you're doing them no favours at all, so the core in the middle must maintain self-care (selfishly, if necessary) or you're no good to the child.