After reading another thread I thought I'd ask this question.

Lots of us are parents and we were all kids at one time, there have been many discussions about the freedoms we had as kids.

Parents gave us trust to run amuck and play out all day. There wasn't the mobile phone (tracker) ringing constantly with a parent asking where you were.

The chances we took with tree climbing and river walking and jaunts to rivelin or grindleford on our own!

Is it really too dangerous to allow our kids the same freedoms we had.

We know what scallywags we were, the chances we took when our parents let us wander. Is that what stops us from allowing our kids out, because we know that the curiousity of youth may land them in hot water once in a while.

Is it just that crimes are more reported that frightens us? The child snatchers and molesters were still around when we were kids, its just that it wasn't highlighted or spoken about then.

Is parent paranoia stifling our kids and causing us to put them under house arrest?

With the possible exception of the roads being worse i.e. shedloads more cars, I dont believe it's significantly more dangerous now than when I was a kid (30 years ago). OK as I'm sure some riskfreaks will point out there are occasionally tragic cases of children who fall into the hands of paedophiles and the like ( and if anyone is going to bring up "little Jamie Bulger" can we please dispense with the "little" and remember that his family called him "James" - "Jamie" was the doing of the Currant Bun ).
I think we are raising a generation of lardy kids who spend to much time watching TV and playing crummy computer games and that parents are indeed way too paranoid about the risk of abduction etc.
It's a well documented fact (and no, factfreaks I don't have a link to prove it) that your kids are much more likely to be touched up by their own brother,Uncle, Granddad or "Uncle"Charlie next door than the semi mythical pervert in a dodgy raincoat....
Let them out, let them free, let them get up to mischief, let them enjoy being kids......

The Newspapers make a killing on printing stories of child molestation stories and it is often very exaggerated, leading parents to be more and more paranoid about what their children are doing, where and who with.

As most people know on this forum, 99.99% of people meeting on the internet do so successfuly and make new friends/partners. But when that 0.01% of bad meetups happen, the newspapers are all over it like the plague, making the the whole thing be frowned upon.

The world isn't that black and white and people should make their owns minds up from experience and not believe everything they read in papers such as The Sun.

I don't want people to get hung up on the 'pervert issue'. I honestly think parents are just fearful full stop.

The fact that if a kid is out of sight of the parent they will most likely come to some harm.

Don't go near the river/stream (fear of drowning)

no tree climbing allowed (broken bones)

no going to the park (fear of gangs and bullies)

God forbid they would be allowed to WALK :o to school alone.

I told a family member that I was allowing my 11 yr old the freedom to walk himself to school and she went ballistic, with tales of all the hideous things that may happen to him on the 10 minute journey. From being run over to the the obvious one of he will be kidnapped by a psycho killer pervert.

I was made to feel like a neglectful parent for allowing it.

We were talking about this yesterday actually. My other half was born in a tiny country village and he/his parents thought nothing of letting him cycle miles to see friends, explore area etc

I'm a born townie and from the age of about 11 regularly took buses to meet friends and go shopping on my own in the next big town. Both of these cases were before the days of mobiles.

Both of us had the stern talking to, be careful, don't talk to strangers etc, but without the scare tactics. In fact OH was saying when his Mum was young there was a known pedophile in her Scottish home town who used to hang around , but the children were told about him and he was treated as a figure to laugh at and and scorn rather than fear. The children knew who he was knew to keep away but weren't afraid of him. (Not saying this was right, just pointing out how things have changed).

There have always been murders, always been sex crimes, always been terrorists, always been some serious lunatics about. But they are the minority.

Its the press that has got bigger and more sensationalised, and there are more ways of getting news on a global scale, so its obvious that you are going to see more cases like this. Anyone interested in the darker side of history will be able to quote cases just as grusome as todays crimes but in days gone by news was unlikely to go out of the town/village you were in. So they were isolated incidents.

My children have as much freedom as they can for their age. There are children on the estate who go to the same schools so they tend to choose someones house or garden and play there.
We all keep and eye on each others kids so I think i am lucky. It may be the environment/estate that kids are living in that determines whether or not the parents let them out more or not.

Moon

Do children really stop in that much now? My second cousin is 9 and he loves playing in the street. He's got a Playstation which he plays on fairly often, but if there are other kids out in the street he'd much prefer to play with them.

I agree that FDU tabloids like the S*n and Mail are very guilty of scaring people with paedophile stories, but then that's their raison d'etre.

My kids do play out but I have to admit to wincing now that its dark so early.

Originally posted by fox20thc
My kids do play out but I have to admit to wincing now that its dark so early.

So were my grandparents...had to be home before or as the street lights came on well into my teens! Same for alot of my friends

Think it is just a thing about the dark.

It can be terrifying to be the parent of a ten year old but we have to swallow our fears, and be sensible, let the kids play out, while the weather's good and the nights are light, as long as you lay certain ground rules; staying in a certain area , letting you know if theyre going to a friend's house etc..

when winter draws on the dark nights are less of an issue than the generally foul weather, who wants the kids out in the driving rain and cold?


:clap:

Originally posted by sharpsinger
when winter draws on the dark nights are less of an issue than the generally foul weather, who wants the kids out in the driving rain and cold?:clap:

Kids want to be out in the cold and rain, I don't quite get it but they do. Come to think of it I would hang out with my friends under the streetlamp at the end of our road in the dark when it was snowing :D

Originally posted by fox20thc
Kids want to be out in the cold and rain, I don't quite get it but they do. Come to think of it I would hang out with my friends under the streetlamp at the end of our road in the dark when it was snowing :D

hehe so did we, couldnt wait to get outside when it was snowing , I dont know, physician heal thyself :heyhey:

Children need to be outside and feel the elements and the seasons. Children up until the age of around 7 operate from their senses. Routines are very important for children and the seasonal one is fundamental....................................... .........................I could go on and on as it is a pet subject of mine. It is also my vocation.

Childhood does need protection and play comes into this as it is a child's work. Protection of childhood does not mean locking them indoors though in front of a PC or TV (very damaging to young brains that are forming).

Anyway i'm going to stop there as my post will become too long.

Try looking up this though it is one of many articles on the subject
http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m0838/is_123/ai_n6038364

ok here is another

http://www.waldorfhomeschoolers.com/nursery-pre.htm

well I just let my kid come home on his own (IN THE DARK :o )

Surprise surprise... hes alive and no worse off for the experience.


( fox - waits for irresponsible parent of the year award hitting me around the back of the legs)

The problem is because not all parents let children have the freedom we had it is the ones who are out alone who are a target. I bet there are no less children missing now than 30 years ago.

If all children were out then the figures would probably not shift.

nursemaiding kids will just lead to a generation of ill adjusted kids who lack the ability to be independent and act on their own.

parents have always had the same worries. you just need to bite the bullet and let your kids have a childhood.

This one links in to a thread on 'I'm really bored'

http://www.sheffieldforum.co.uk/showthread.php?s=&threadid=73382&highlight=60s+70s

I really do believe that communication and media have improved so much over the years that the same number of incidents have a totally different effect on the population at large.

Everything from bike helmets to the sex offenders register have made the world a safer place for kids (the only thing going the other way is the quantity of traffic that kids on bikes and playing in streets have to deal with), we're just conditioned to react in a paranoid fashion and restrict risk wherever possible.

My Step Dad was very strict so I never had the freedom most young girls were allowed and wasn't allowed a boyfriend until I was 16 and I wouldn't dare go into a Pub until I was 18 cos I thought my Dad would find out and was scared of the consequences.

I do tend to let my kids expericence life more than I did and have taught them to be sensible in the fun they have.

My eldest daughter is 17 and has more freedom than I had but is sensible with it.

Yes she has come home a bit tipsy a couple of times but she is not clubbing every night and on drugs or pregnant.

I am not the perfect Mother but I have told my kids to make sure they experience life to the full, safely, before they settle down.

Maybe if I'd done that I wouldn't have got divorced!

Sayin all that i do worry about drinks being spiked and have lectured my daughters on this and I do worry about them getting into fights with other girls because it does seem a lot more violent than when I was younger, when I was in my 30's i had my drink spiked and not with alcohol. At the moment my first daughter isn't into clubbing but I am concerned about my other daughters but all I can do is warn and advise them.